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204,363 I've found that men who are single in their 40s either fucked around a lot or have a string of 4,5 month relationships. Idk no long term relationship? That says something. You either can't keep a girl, you get bored fast, or you're really stubborn and as soon as she shows imperfections you're gone


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204,362 When did beauty stop being a requirement for art?


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204,361 Guys, have you tasted your own semen?


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204,360 Do girls love guys who play guitar?


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204,359 I think my neighbor doesn't mow his lawn as a way of tormenting the rest of us. What a prick.


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204,358 I would like to have Game Of Thrones sex with my husband. No showers, raw, wicked, and dangerous.


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204,357 Before I become a boring house wife in a sexless marriage, I had sex in a lot of public places . I once play with my boyfriend dick while waiting for our food at the restaurant, had a quickie in the car wash , on a park behind a bush in plain daylight  haha my exes never had a dull moment with me .


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204,356 When did we become so spoiled. I grew up without air conditioning. We all did. I don't remember any houses having it. We would go to the beach to cool down, or play in the yard with the hose. We'd drink lots of Kool-Aid. It worked just fine. But these days everything is air conditioned. The end result is kids stay indoors all summer. They are missing out. We have raised a generation of spoiled whiny brats.


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204,355 I am so hungry. I had package of ramen a day for the past two days. I have one package left. Half today and half tomorrow. Then I get paid on Friday.


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204,354 My best friend from childhood asks me why I’m drinking such an obscure beer.

I say my mom bought it for me.

She says does your mom drink beer?

I say no, my mom doesn’t drink.

Then I am reminded of my old friends tragic and tumultuous childhood as both her parents slowly drank themselves to death. I think about how lucky I am just to say my mom doesn’t drink.

She replies, “yeah haha, I can tell by the beer she bought”


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204,352 I need to say good bye. I need to say good bye to the memories, to the thoughts of your touch, to the image of your face that night and every night. I have to figure how to let you go. I can’t keep crying over you. It’s so painful. I only wish I knew how.


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204,351 I would like to get married in winter. Winter is beautiful with snow failing and the fireplace roaring. I need to find a man who agrees.


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204,350 Is social nudism with your wife's knowledge but not permission cheating?


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204,349 My wife is on a diet. She eats minimally. But she continues to drink 4 glasses of wine every evening. Suggesting she stop with the drinking is like trying to take a bone away from a rabid junk yard dog. SMH.


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204,348 There’s a woman where I work who gets paid for a 40 hour work week but never works one.  This employee likes to tell everyone else how to do their job.

She has been the topic of a few rants and discussions at work, more so recently, since her constant criticism of everyone else has been full throttle lately.  


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204,347 I had a weird thought that I can’t tell anyone I know, so I’ll tell the internet.

Here I was watching some fun vintage porn videos, and one of the cars caught my interest (not like that lol, gag), plus the movie posters and appliances in the house.

It was the mid-1950’s. No surgical enhancements, no photoshop, au naturale, no ‘little blue pill’, and all sexier than modern porn, and damn that acting was horrible.

That’s when it struck me. Those 20-ish year old women are now almost all dead. The rest have to tuck their nipples into their pants and get their asses wiped at the nursing home.

Yeah, random, and weird to think of, but not exactly something I can chat with the neighbors about. But hell yeah I’m going to watch again. Thanks for being sexy and naked back then, gramma.

Bow-chicka-wow-wow


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204,345 I'm no business expert, but they are advertising their Wednesday half price movie matinees... on Thursdays.

Uhm...


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204,344 You think I don't know? Yes, I know.


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204,343 Years ago I used to have a crush on these guy we used to see a few times a year because of my husband business. He ended up selling and didn’t see him for a long time until 3 weeks ago while I was at the water park, we were waiting on line for a ride when I noticed these guy kept staring and smiling at me it took me a while to recognize him the whole time he kept flirting with me it was very tempting to walk up to him and say hi but I was with my daughter and he was with a few friends oh well at least I know what he looks like shirtless in swim trunks and he knows what I look like in a bikini. Maybe I will get lucky again and bump into him before summer it’s over.


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204,341 Sometimes I stay in bed all day. I watch movies on the laptop. I eat in bed. I take naps. I text friends. It might be my favorite kind of day.


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204,340 I stand with the idea that you shouldn't criticize me on the job I'm doing in the here and now, if you left a terrible mess in your past. Go back and fix what you conveniently ran away from. Show us how good you are. Then I will listen to your critique of what I'm wrong doing today.


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204,339 Want to be tarred and feathered? Live in a small town and suggest that house prices are falling. The townsfolk come out in force to saying to nastiest things about you. You are a liar. You are an idiot. Move the fuck out of this town. All for speaking the truth. People are in denial. They don't deal well with reality and have some serious anger issues.


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204,338 Back in 1969, just after Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrich landed The Eagle on the moon, they held a Catholic communion. You know, like prayers and eating a host. This strikes me as incredibly wrong. Nothing has fucked up the Earth as much as religion. And what do we do first thing on the moon? Introduce religion. It never should have been allowed, especially on a taxpayer funded project.


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204,337 My dick used to be thicker. Is this something which happens as guys age, our dicks lose some girth?


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204,336 So many people online act like experts. Yeh, I can google too. Sickening how you pretend to be something you are not.


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204,335 Roger Stone is a hero.


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204,333 i need someone to touch me...



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204,332 Has your tongue ever touched another person's anus?


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204,331 Sorry lady I don’t know a Danielle and have never called your number.


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204,330 I'll miss you, random pretty Chinese woman in the office.  I'm leaving this company soon.  We won't see each other again.

For the last two years I bet we barely said 100 words to each.  We passed each other in the halls and stood next to each other in the office kitchen and the elevator and sat a few feet away from each other while we ate our lunch.  

But we pretended not to see each other.  Oh, we could see each other checking each other out and quickly turning our eyes away.  But we hardly ever said a word to each other.

I don't know if you were crazy, a bitch, a self-absorbed brat, strange, or just shy.  Maybe a combination of all of these.  

I often wondered if your silence and glances were signs that you had a crush on me.

Maybe we just stayed quiet and pretended to ignore each other because we knew a relationship would be very inappropriate for several reasons.

I just wanted you to know that I thought you were very pretty and alluring.  I feel like we've had an entire romance based on silence, just knowing that we could never act on our feelings and be with each other.

We won't see each other again, but once in a while I might look you up on Facebook or Google search you, just to see how things are going.



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204,329 This is from just today.

She complains bitterly that I stopped by the bakery and bought cupcakes for her and the kids. It was meant as a nice gesture on my part. But she is angry because cupcakes contain sugar. I guess that's different from the sugar in all the ice cream she buys.

I went for a walk on this beautiful day. She complained I went the wrong way. It didn't know it was possible to go "the wrong way" on a pleasant walk. It's my walk. Don't I get a say in which way I go? Do I need to be ridiculed for taking a walk. Jeez.

She just wants to be angry.


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204,328 I'm the person that just got the job. Got a call today from another staffing service that didn't know I got hired. I was talking to them and mentioned that my interview went really well but the guy said several times he had had to let temps go because "they couldn't get along with anybody."

She said, "Yeah, they have a problem there."

"Really, what kind of problem?"

"Well, they have a high turnover. They have problems with the people that go there."

Uh-oh.

I told her to keep my resume on file in case it doesn't work out. She said, "I definitely will."

Uh-oh. God, I hope this isn't a repeat of my last job.


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204,327 In my younger years I lived in a run down walk up building. It was in a bad neighbor hood. I was woken up one night by a black guy in my bedroom trying to steal things. I started screaming. I threw my pillow at him. He climbed back out the window and left. I still have nightmares about it.


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204,326 I'm broken. I don't know how am I going to put myself back together, you loved me but are no longer in love / attracted to me. This is devastating and I feel so hollow. So many years together and we grew apart.  You forgot about me, your partner. You took me for granted and then simply stopped loving me, you forgot to tell me that part when I said let's really try!. I believed you when you said you were going to try, I wanted to believe you. I'm sorry for my mistakes, for being tired of feeling left out, alone. I have to let you go and I don't know how yet. You need to go please. My mental health can't take your friendliness. You were my husband and you no longer want to be. I hope you find whatever is it you're looking for. Good bye best friend, I hope you can find peace.


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204,325 ME: "You are spending too much money on yourself for trivial things. It's adding up!"

HER: "Can we talk about this after I get back from yoga class?"


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204,324 I'm not sure if I'm attracted to him, and he says he's not at least conversation wise... aka basically called me dumb without saying that word. But I miss him.


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204,322 My new-ish boyfriend is someone I could easily spend the rest of my life with.  Already I am very much in love with him, and he is so kind and open hearted and is also unequivically on my side. He lives, technically, across the country but hes here for a long while for work. I really hope he is truly getting a divorce like he says he will. I would like to marry him myself eventually. so I hope he is for real on that divorce thing...


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204,320 304. I'd be Jealous too! If I lived in the ghetto my whole life.


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204,319 313. Haha Told you I'd win. ;)


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204,318 I enjoy reading about pitbull owners mauled by their own dogs.


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204,317 I have a friend who bought a sailboat for $1. In the cabin she found $3. I love this.


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204,316 She blocked me. Damn. I wanted to block her first.


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204,315 My daughter is anorexic. I try to cajole her to eat. Like I bought a German chocolate cake. I told her it was delicious and she should try a piece. No. She didn't want any. But she did ask for my credit card so she could buy a new pair of running sneakers. I said okay, you can have my credit card. But only if you eat a slice of this yummy cake.

"You are a control freak! You are the worst Dad ever. You are manipulative. I don't want your stupid cake. I don't want a stupid pair of sneakers." Then she ran off to her bedroom.

I'm losing this battle. In fact, I'm losing the entire war.


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204,314 I’m going to create a paper trail of the psychosis. Of all of it.

I don’t think it will get rid of the alcoholic/addict renter, but it will do something for my sanity to write this crap out. Date, time, the tears the threats, etc.

Stay out of my life, you’re unbalanced!!!!!


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204,313 I work with a woman who randomly starts mentioning something of interest to her. She found a new recipe of kidney bean pie. Which is fine. I'm glad those things interest her. But the problem is, she always ends the conversation telling me she will send the link. And she does. I get an email with a recipe for kidney bean pie. I have no interest in kidney bean pie. I don't know why she thinks I do. It's some view she has that everyone thinks like her. She's interested in the recipe, so therefore I must be too. This sounds like a minor annoyance, but the catch is she does this over and over again. One day it's kidney bean pie. The next day she talks to me and sends a link about investing in crypto-currency. Day after that she sends me a youtube video on the proper way to fold a flag. I have no interest in any of these things. Yet she keeps doing this to me along with follow up emails asking if I made the kidney bean pie yet. No, I haven't made the pie and I never will. I'm actually thinking of quitting my job and working somewhere else to get away from her.


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204,312 I keep every photo people send me, i save them to my phone, email to an address I set up just got this purpose and then delete them from my phone.
I literally have thousands of photos saved, only problem is they aren't sorted or in any easily viewed format. Just by date.  I sometimes can't remember who sent them to me but I still can't let myself delete them



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204,311 SB fucked me on her couch, to my persuasion, with her daughter in the other room.  Sat on me, fucked me, with blanket over us. Then lubed my cock and stroked me. Edged me.  Then to completion.  I don't think I've EVER cum that much.  
Precum drips over her fingers, and then an explosion of streams of cum going OVER my head as I lay on the couch. Several!  It was so hot!


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204,307 These people who see a disaster, like a car wreck or a house fire, and pull out their cells phones to film it, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU????? Help the victims you assholes!


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204,306 I never wanted to be the boss. I hate being the boss. Why did they choose me? I will never do this again.


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204,305 I never liked Stephen King novels.


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204,304 Super rich woman in my town just posted to the community facebook page that the air conditioning in her pool house is not working and who should she call to fix it.

Air conditioning? Pool house?

Fucking die bitch.


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204,303 I'm the person who interviewed for the great job. Guess what, I just got the offer! I don't know when I start yet but probably next Monday.

I'm nervous like everyone is when they start a new job, but what a relief to no longer be unemployed! Yay!


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204,302 I went to a doctor's appointment two hours after having sexual intercourse. I took a shower but there was probably still some semen in my vj.


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204,301 People are so fucking argumentative about everything.


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204,299 The guy I went on a date with, I thought we could leave it amicable but apparently he's doing that has to have the last word- bye thing.  He went to kiss me and I guess I backed up a little but we kissed. So he feels rejected.  The guy just finished smoking cigarettes,  and didn't even pop a mint.  So he's picking out another part of the date, I said something that he wondered how I could think that. Calling it odd and not the only time. So he's trying to call me odd and dumb. He's just mad I rejected him in that moment.


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204,297 I watched a series of youtube videos showing random acts of kindness. It is so uplifting. I had forgotten people can be good.


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204,296 Not all villains wear black cloaks. Some wear t-shirts saying "World's Best Dad".


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204,295 I cant lose you  i care for you


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204,294 My husband been having a lot of health problems this year , I have begged him to go to the doctor and he refuses gets angry at me while he is an ahole towards me and has threatened me with denying me seeing our kid if I leave. I wouldn’t like our kid losing his father .


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204,293 I'm always looking at other women and imagining having relationships with them.  It's difficult to think like a married man when my wife of 15 years doesn't touch me, she threatens to take the kids from me, she never tries to change anything about herself (while I constantly try), and she always sides with her family when I have a disagreement with them.  It's like she's not in this family, she's still in her parents' family that she grew up in.  I get so little love from her that I'm always imagining myself with somebody else.


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204,291 My friend wants to hang out when I get home from vacation. I’m dreading this. She has terrible manners and general pubic behavior. If we go to the movies, she talks during the movie and argues over prices at the concessions area. If we go to dinner, she belches at the table and complains endlessly about the littlest things that aren’t to her liking. If my boyfriend joins us for drinks at our favorite bar, she traps him into a debate about politics which I refuse to participate in, and it ruins the atmosphere. She can be pretty condescending to him because she likes to act like she knows everything. Aside from this, she’s a good friend and fun to hang with at one of our places. But she likes to go out, and if I tell her my reservations she will take it very personally. By the time a person is in their 30s, I thought manners and basic public behavior wouldn’t be an issue anymore, good lord...


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204,290 When I was very young I vomited after eating peach yogurt. I have never had peach anything since.


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204,289 The Congo is currently experiencing the second largest outbreak of Ebola in history. It has been going on for a year. The reason no first world country has stepped in is because they are trying to see if the new vaccine works. In other words, they are running an experiment and letting people die.

I'll bet if the vaccine does prove effective, Ebola will magically spread to the USA and there will be huge profits for the pharmaceutical companies.


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204,288 I think mental illness is involved.


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204,287 Young woman I know posted a picture of her bed with her new comforter on it.  It's hard to look at the picture without thinking of the 30 guys she's fucked on that bed.


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204,285 I commented on a post earlier today.  I was saying how I can have everything perfect around here, but then my husband will find ONE thing wrong.  One little thing, and it's a blowout.

He's been working out of town per usual, and is home for a few days. leaving tomorrow.  It's been great.  We've had nice chats, laughs, got up early today to have coffee on the porch and then went out to breakfast.  Later in the day we decided to watch a movie.

Three quarters into the movie, he gets up to get a snack.  He comes back with a bag of chips, and I said, "Don't eat them all," which started out as a joke, because, you see - they are Ghost Pepper chips.  But before I could tell him what they were, he snapped at me.  "If I do, I'll just buy another bag!"  I then said, "Well I was lucky to find them because almost no one has them...and it was the last bag.  But they're Ghost Pepper chips, so they're super hot. I could only eat three."

With that, he jumped off the couch and went into the kitchen to find another snack, because yeah - they were too hot.  But he was making a lot of ruckus.  Then I hear, "Who lives here?!"  I asked what he meant, and he said, "Never mind!"  then threw something in the microwave and slammed the door.  I asked what he was looking for, and he yelled, "Something to eat!!!"  So I said, "What do you want?"  "CHIPS!"  "Okay, what kind of chips? You know I have other stuff downstairs."  "All these years together and you don't know what I like?!?!  All this stuff in here isn't what I like!!!"

He finally told me what he wanted, and I had it, but this devolved into a huge fight.  I told him if he just told me what he wanted in the house for when he comes home, I would have it.  I guess he wants me to just have everything he likes *just in case he wants something*, even if no one else eats it.  But see, he snacks randomly.  It may be potato chips one time.  Or snack cakes another.  Or Doritos another time.  I just don't know. "How about I just go somewhere where I feel peace!!!" and headed to the basement.  Obviously he was texting someone about our argument, as he's getting a lot of texts right now.  When he came upstairs he was just slamming things around and packing his suitcase in a very exaggerated way.

This is my life.  Everything around here is perfect.  But he found ONE thing to yell at me about.  All these years together and this is the first time he's screamed about not having a preferred snack in the house.


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204,284 I like to sleep with married women. They are wild in bed, willing to do anything you want and then you get to send them home to hubby.
I know it's bad but the sex is amazing and I don't ever have to worry about them trying to spend the night or change the way I live.


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204,283 I was talking to this guy for weeks before we met. We were both mentally attracted to each other and I had feelings. We finally went on a date and I don't think I'm attracted to him. He's sooo nice and I liked the time we spent. I'd hang out with him again as friends, I just don't think I can see myself sleeping with him. I feel a bit let down by the situation but this is why you meet quick I guess, so you know fast if there is physical attraction. He didn't really look like his pics though, I can't put my finger on it. Don't think they were old ones either.  I would definitely like to stay friends


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204,282 I've learned to fix my own car. Car parts are cheap! I spend under $50 instead of paying the mechanic $500 of more!


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204,280 Hate getting invited to events for people I honestly don’t care about. Baby shower? Don’t care. Don’t like people. Wedding? Don’t care. Commitment is a waste of time. Graduating? Ok, but unless it’s chemistry, history, or mathematics, does it matter? Are you going to change the world?

I am 25. It can’t be normal to be this bitter.


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204,279 Eventually we will split, because I don’t want children, and I know you do.
You think I’ll change my mind, but I won’t. I know that I won’t. Anyone else who experiences the same feelings can probably agree they knew within themselves that they didn’t want children.
Sorry, but I warned you. If you ever get me pregnant, I will do everything I can to get rid of it.
You’ve been warned.


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204,278 I'm on a new diet. I've been on starvation diets in the past. They work, but they are brutal. This new diet isn't too bad tho. I made it up myself. I eat no carbs, no sugar, nothing fatty. Mostly I have salads with plenty of veggies and a little balsamic dressing, and with a little tuna on top. The salads are large. I don't  limit the size. I eat as much as I want. They keep me full. I also drink lots of V8 for vitamins. It's been three weeks. I'm down 12 pounds. I have no hunger pains or cravings. This has been my easiest diet yet.


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204,277 As a kid I had three dogs that died. Each was hit by a car. It was a repeating pattern. We got a dog. The dog would become my best friend. By a year later the dog was dead. It crushed me every time.

My wife wanted a dog. I was skeptical but I went along with it because we have a fenced in yard. The dog became my best friend for 5 years. He died of cancer.

My wife wants to get another dog. This time I said no. Now she's not talking to me. I don't have the strength to explain anymore.

I wish she would understand that sometimes she should just accept NO as an answer. That's what marriage means. Sometimes you just go with what your partner says without causing World War III.


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204,275 I pray for you ..I asked for you ..you are one of the most valuable people that I know.i love the way you love others just give me some of that energy is it too much to ask.


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204,274 As my ideal setup, I picture myself working in the patio furniture department of Walmart by day, and being a secret ninja assassin by night.


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204,272 At the daycare I work at, I am interested in getting to know some of the moms. One in particular is VERY friendly to me. Friendlier to me than to my coworkers. I think it's because she sees how attentive I am with the kids and how much I care. But it could be something else. The fact that she treats me like a human being blows my mind. Maybe I have low self esteem and don't think I deserve to have people talking to me. When she comes to pick up her daughter at the end of the day I feel so happy when she talks to me, especially when I've been feeling discouraged all day. Is she being polite? Does she just notice how sad I am? Does she like how I treat her daughter? Is she just as lonely as I am? Is it appropriate to ask her to hang out? I just want to make friends, and some of these moms seem like perfect candidates. I wonder if they realize I'd like to be friends.


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204,270 No one is as dumb and lazy as my wife. No one. She was driving in a town about 30 miles from us to visit a store. When she needed to get back home, she entered our street address in the map app on her phone. She started following the directions. Ten minutes later the phone tells her she has arrived at her destination. She looks around. She doesn't see anything she recognizes. She gets out of the car, knocks on the homeowner's door, and asks if this is (I'll make it up here) 25 Elm Street, our address. The homeowner says yes. My wife tells the home owner it doesn't look like 25 Elm Street. I'm sure the homeowner was confused (and probably a little scared at this point). My wife calls me and says something is wrong. She explains the whole story. She says she's at 25 Elm Street but it's not our house.

I don't know how to deal with her any more. She's not old. She's not senile. She's just mentally lazy. She won't put in any effort to think about anything. I'm sure many of you have already figured it out. She entered 25 Elm Street, but she didn't enter our town name. The phone pointed her to 25 Elm in a different nearby town. Simple things like this don't occur to her.

One day this will all come crashing down. Like her frying pan will be on fire, so she'll throw gasoline on it and then tell me she thought liquids put out fire. Whatever it is, I'm sure you'll read about her one day in the news.


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204,269 You can no longer mention someone is from a different country or you will be branded a racist. These are the new rules in America.

I'm getting very tired of this crap.

How about this, you call me a racist again and I gouge your eyes out with a dirty stick. These are my new rules.


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204,268 Had an affair with a married woman in a town I traveled to for work quite often. Neither of our spouses ever knew about it. We got together three times for a few hours of fucking. The last time, I told her I was going to drive up to an attraction near her house later that day. When I drove up there, I went by her house. She was sitting on the front porch. I honked and she saw me.
About 1/2 hour later, she comes pulling into the attraction area on the back of her husbands motorcycle, he was driving. Separately, we all walked around the area, watching a ship traveling on the water. I went back to the parking area and was checking out his motorcycle. He came over and we talked about it for a while.
Little did he know that just a few hours earlier, I had my cock balls deep in his wife's mouth and cunt... wildest sex I ever had.


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204,267 There’s these obnoxious guy , let’s call him Oompa Loopa every time there’s women talking about an attractive guy or an ex he assumes we are talking about him . Why ? Idk maybe because back in his youth he was popular douch bag you see bar hoping in a Friday night and he hasn’t get the memo yet that he is closer to senior discount age than being back to being the douch bag .


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204,266 The new global warming seawall is officially called:

Staten Island Multi-Use Elevated Promenade

Catchy!

"Hey, want to go for a walk on the Staten Island Multi-Use Elevated Promenade?"

Who thinks of these things? Are we really in good hands when leaving decisions to our government?


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204,265 Came down the stairs this morning and was immediately greeted by my wife saying, "You left a pot on the stove last night. No one leaves a pot on the stove. Never leave a pot on the stove. You leave it there and I have to put it away. You're lazy and inconsiderate. Why should I take time out of my day to fix a problem you caused? I'm warning you, don't do it again."

I made dinner last night. I make dinner every night. It was a chicken kale soup. After I tidied everything up, I washed out the pot and left it to dry on the stove. Shopping for the food, making the dinner, cleaning up - it took over two hours in total. My wife having to put the pot back in the closet took about 10 seconds.

This is what I deal with everyday. She is the most bitter person I've ever encountered. She tries to find a problem with everything I do. I work all day. She doesn't. I cook her dinner. You'd think a thank you was in order. No, only menacing scolding. How did she become this person?


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,264 "The picture is aesthetically pleasing to the eye."

As opposed to aesthetically pleasing to the tongue? Aesthetically pleasing to the nose?

You obviously work in the department of redundancy department....



likes: 3
comments: 0

204,263 In my neck of the woods, I'm told when when you tow a trailer, only wimps put the safety pin in on the hitch. Men are weird.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,262 Whenever I watch porn..I feel extremely guilty and uncomfortable as soon as I finish.
I’m ashamed of sexuality, I guess. Sadly I am married. He gets what he wants, and I generally am interested in the sex, but sometimes I’m thinking of my ex, or feeling overwhelmed with my general emotions..

I really don’t think it’s normal. Don’t hear many people talking about it.. just hope I’m not alone.. :/


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,261 I pray for you ..,


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,260 Lexington N.C I'm sorry but this town is horrible...


likes: 3
comments: 0

204,259 Every summer, I think back on the summer I first fell in love as a teenager. I miss those days. I miss that person. But, we put our dreams away.


likes: 1
comments: 4

204,258 I'm old and coming to the realization that even little girls are stronger than me.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,256 I tried to help him - many times. Cocaine induced heart attack at 48 years old. Please everyone who reads this; don't use cocaine and let people who love you help.


likes: 3
comments: 4

204,255 That feeling when you have a can of soup for dinner and then when cleaning up you realize the soup expired four years ago...


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,254 I often wonder if you kept a copy of the very awkward picture you took of me .


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,253 I hate the name Grainne. I always thought it was pronounced as "granny". But no, it's some weird thing like Gran-ya. Which makes no sense. I lose respect for anyone who names their daughter this weird word.


likes: 2
comments: 6

204,252 Many mornings, right through high school, my mom would take her shower and then walk from the bathroom back to her bedroom completely naked. No towel. Nothing. A teenage son should not have these memories.  


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,251 I don't eat birthday cake. My secret is I tell people I am on a diet, or allergies or something. The real reason is germs. When I was about 8 years of age we had a birthday party for grandma. She was under the weather and not feeling well. When she blew out the candles her dentures flew out of her mouth and onto the cake. We ate it anyway. A few days later  lot of people got sick. Then when I was 12 a classmate had a birthday party. He too had the sniffles and a bad cough. As he blew out the candles I could see spittle coming out of his mouth onto the cake. A few days later 5 or 6 classmates who attended the party called in sick. Birthday cake is nasty,


likes: 2
comments: 2

204,250 I worked an 80 hour week. I had six hours of sleep per night or less. I'm wiped out. I asked my wife if she could water the garden today. She said, "I'm busy, you water the damn flowers." She was going to a jewelry sale.


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,249 That Epstein guy is disgusting. But the people that were part of his cult are just as bad. Rape and child abuse should be met with death. I'm sorry, but you abuse a child in any way, I would blow your brains out and sleep like a baby afterwards.


likes: 5
comments: 4

204,247 I hate the way my sister in law says France. She pronounces it as Frahnz. She's from New jersey. She went to public school here like the rest of us. She puts on this French accent to come across as superior. She's a faker pretending she is high born.


likes: 1
comments: 4

204,246 I really hate my periods, today I had actually plans to quit being lazy and be productive but my back hurts , my boobs hurt and my cramps won’t stop on top it I can’t stop craving sugary drinks .  


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,245 If an old man, a stranger to you, collapsed and wasn't breathing, would you perform mouth to mouth?


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,244 I'm in your city today, I'm staying the night at the hotel we hooked up at, the one right near your house.
Great memories of that visit, still think about watching undress for me, then dropping to your knees, and it just got better after that.
Thanks ᖟᶐ*


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,242 I’m not trying to start a debate or take sides I just want to state a fact that no one ever brings up.  See I live in the town on the Texas border where all the immigrant news is coming from.  One of the things they always complain about is that the kids have no blankets or they have those thin space blankets. Those poor kids are so cold right but..... it’s so hot down here.  I mean it’s 104 degrees every day.  The heat index is over 110 many days. They just don’t need blankets.


likes: 2
comments: 0
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204,241 There's something off about my workmate's eyes. They are too close together. They make her look dumb. She should definitely wear glasses instead of contacts. The glasses would make her eyes less noticeable. But how do I tell her this? There is no way. :(


likes: 0
comments: 6

204,240 I haven't had a conversation with a black person in what must be 30 years. I'm not prejudice. It's just that we exist in different circles. I have zero overlap with black people.


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,239 I love getting fucked from behind but my booty is too big for most men to really get past it :( so it’s usually just missionary for me. I’m not even fat, my waist is slim, just have a bubble butt. Maybe I need a man with a bigger dick. I want my back blown out


likes: 2
comments: 1

204,238 I still feel you.....


likes: 1
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204,237 The only person who thinks your newborn baby is cute is you . Everyone else is just being polite. Your baby looks like a gargoyle. It's frightening!


likes: 0
comments: 7
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204,236 I wish it was okay for men to cry.


likes: 1
comments: 14

204,235 My husband has no middle name.


likes: 0
comments: 8

204,234 bitchy ugly fat twit posted on the town facebook forum asking if any stores in the mall were having sales on bathing suits yet. i responded and said yes but they wouldnt have anything in her size. soooooo satisfying!


likes: 0
comments: 4
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204,233 There was a incident when I was a teen. We found a body in the woods. Don't know what I was thinking but when my friend ran home to call the police, I looked around on the body for jewelry and cash before the police arrived. There wasn't any. I'm not sure I would have taken it anyway. But I did look.


likes: 1
comments: 6

204,232 My brother touched me when I was 9.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,231 I know a rabbi who went to see the immigration detention facilities at the southwest border. He said the children were treated very well. He was "pleasantly surprised". They spend a large part of their day in classes learning English, science, math, and history. They are given clean clothes every day. They get time outside to play soccer every day. They are housed two children to a room.

Why is the news reporting the opposite?


likes: 2
comments: 16
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204,230 I was the first one to do anal with you, thank you.  Wonder how many other guys in the past few years have had the pleasure of using your ass?  Did you ever let hubby do you there?


likes: 0
comments: 7

204,229 Girls that drink all the time, like beer, and still have amazing bodies. You baffle me! How does that happen? I have like one or two, and I'm a bloated mess the next day.  
I know, metabolism. Or whatever.


likes: 0
comments: 8

204,228 We moved in here a year ago. My wife's crap is still stacked in boxes. I unpacked everything I could and made the place look nice - except for her cardboard boxes everywhere. But she won't let me unpack her things. I didn't know this about her when we got married.


likes: 0
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204,227 I know this 20 year old female. She's tubby. Rather than working out to bring it under control, she wears bare midriff tops, but with really high wasted hot pants, so it covers up her fat rolls. It is so sad to see. She knows she's fat. She tries to hide it with the high waist pants. She wants to be thought of as pretty, or she wouldn't post so many selfies. But she's too lazy to do anything real about it. In the end she looks ridiculous Everyone mocks her. Clearly a future cat lady - you know the ones, the delusional kind with far too much red lipstick, but she thinks it's perfect.


likes: 0
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204,226 I see the media going nuts over people calling Epstein's victims "underage women" instead of "children". But isn't "underage women" more descriptive? There were no boys involved, so a broad word like "children" doesn't tell the accurate story. Also, the female victims ranged in age from 14 to 17. I don't think of 17 year old females as "children". It sounds disrespectful. I think under any other circumstances it would be fine to call them "underage women." But when the media is looking for a problem to pick on, suddenly "underage women" is wrong. So twisted.


likes: 1
comments: 10

204,225 I put the toilet seat up and down using my foot. I will never touch it with my hand.


likes: 1
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204,224 I’m a borderline stalker.


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204,223 I wonder what happened to the person who was going for a job interview. Or the guy/girl don’t remember who was going to ask their crush out .  Any updates will be interesting to see how things went .


likes: 2
comments: 3

204,222 I try not to let myself be happy. Happiness too often gets crushed. But if I don't allow for happiness, no one can take it away from me.


likes: 1
comments: 3

204,221 How that’s the saying goes ? “ She is a carpenter dreams , flat as a board and easy to nail “ ....


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204,220 My husband cheated on me by getting hand jobs in massage parlors.
You might say, well since he didn’t have sex it wasn’t fully cheating.
We’re in therapy and he is trying to make it right.
Little does he know I’m never going to be faithful to him again, ever.
I’ve had a line of men wanting to satisfy my sexual desires and a husband who was too busy with his head up his ass to see he had a hot wife, who was more than willing to have sex. But he was paying for handies like a little bitch.
I’ll stay married, for convenience’s sake.
But I’m getting laid. And I’ve finally got the grounds to fuck other people and not feel any remorse or guilt in doing so!
I should actually thank my husband!


likes: 2
comments: 6

204,219 This site needs to have more sex secrets to make the boring workday go by faster! Let's go people! Here's one of mine –
I was divorced for several years and dating this amazing woman exclusively. We both had kids from a previous marriage and didn't want to do the Brady Bunch thing, so we waited until all the kids grew up and went off to college or at least graduated high school and moved out of our two houses. We finally got married and are still happily married today. We have an awesome relationship. During the time that we were dating my soon-to-be wife met all my friends and coworkers. There were many people that we hung out with and we had a lot of great times with other couples going out to dinner, concerts, etc. I also had a lot of divorced and single female friends who got along great with my wife and there was never any conflict. My wife would joke about me having so many female friends, but she never had a problem with us all hanging out together. My female friends all loved my wife as well and would say how lucky I was to find such an amazing woman.
So, after years of dating I proposed to my wife and we of course post it on Facebook and text our closest friends and family. THAT DAY, I started getting calls, texts and emails from my female friends wanting to have wild sex with me before the wedding date. Not only the single women contacted me, but a couple of married women who have the nice house, kids, husbands with good jobs, etc. All these women were good friends of both me and my wife over the years and went to parties and shows with us and we were over each other’s houses many times. I had offers to meet these women in hotels, cars, in parks, at THEIR houses and they described in great detail everything they wanted me to do to them. All no strings attached, and they would never breathe a word to anyone. Each one pitched it like “You KNOW you are supposed to have wild sex with someone before you get locked into a marriage, so let’s f* our brains out before the wedding date.” I was stunned. I gave each one a polite “no thank you” and never told my wife. We have been married a couple of years now and once in a while we will see one of these women at barbecues or at the gym and a couple of them have reminded me that their offer is still valid. It still amazes me that they would throw my wife (who became their friend over the years) and their own husband or boyfriend under a bus in a second just for a fling. Then they’ll smile and be pals with my wife like they are all best friends. By the way, no regrets on my part. I would never do anything to mess up my marriage. I am the lucky one.



likes: 8
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204,218 The trick to giving yourself a good haircut - wear a baseball hat for the next few weeks. A hat covers all sins. Then the hair fills in enough and everything looks normal and you just saved $25 by not using a barber.


likes: 1
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204,217 My husband was having chest pains. He was white. His heart was racing. He felt very weak. I didn't know what to do. Should I bring him into his doctors office which was 5 minutes away. Or should I take him to the hospital which was 30 minutes away?

I frantically called his doctor. A nurse answered. She asked for his date of birth. I gave it to her. She asked for our phone number. I ignored her and explained the medical emergency. She asked again for our phone number. I asked if this was necessary, we are dealing with a possible heart attack. She said we couldn't continue unless I gave her the phone number. I gave it to her. Then she asked for the home address. I couldn't believe this. There was this tone in her voice like she was doing this on purpose to torment me. I gave her our home address. There was silence. I asked what was going on. She said, "I'm waiting for you to give me your zip code, it's part of your home address."

I lost it. I screamed at her saying my husband was possibly having a heart attack and she is asking me all these unimportant questions about a zip code. I WANT TO KNOW WHERE TO TAKE HIM - THE HOSPITAL OR THE DOCTORS OFFICE!

She said with a sneering attitude, "Well that is really your choice."

Arrrg!

I slammed down the phone and drove my husband to the hospital. It wasn't a heart attack. They concluded it was a reaction to a new blood pressure medicine the doctor had prescribed a day earlier. Thank God. He came out of it okay. We were both extremely shaken up, we survived the ordeal though.

But that doctor and his staff, WTF???? Some people shouldn't be in the medical field.

On FB people often ask for a local doctor recommendation. This doctor's name comes up a lot. I can't wait for someone to recommend him again. I'm going to launch into a tirade about how his office was the worst place I've ever had to deal with and DON'T EVER GO THERE.


likes: 0
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204,216 This birthday coming out my only wish will be for both you and your nasty husband ( old, short, bald , short temper ) would pack and never come back to this city . Whatever you guys go it’s nothing but chaos and I don’t care if his daughter decided to move here as an excuse to keep coming back here . All you guys do it’s spread rumors, gossip , sleep around with other people nasty just nasty .... go away kriscilla and frank ( Gary, Gus, Steven whatever your real name it’s )


likes: 0

204,215 I masturbate while fantasizing about you. My quick  orgasm feels like a burning hunger deep inside of me that can only be satiated by your cock. I love you


likes: 1
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204,214 After seeing doctors about my weight gain for the last 15 years, they finally nailed it down to gluten sensitivity.  I cut out the gluten and the sugar, and my constant hunger pangs went away.  It wasn't normal hunger, either.  It was like every cell in my body was twisting and squeezing until I ate something.  It would wake me up at night.  I had gained about 60 pounds in those 15 years, and no matter how much I exercised and tried to eat right, the constant, abnormal hunger made me have to stuff my face.

Now that the "abnormal" hunger has been replaced with "normal" hunger, I've noticed that I like the feeling of being hungry and refusing to eat.  I'll skip breakfast and eat lunch, and then refuse to intake anything until dinner, no matter how hungry I am.  Sometimes I won't eat until 2 in the afternoon.  It's so satisfying to feel hungry and not eat.  It's like it gives me a feeling of control to not eat.


likes: 2
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204,213 Of course Kriscilla was behind of this mess , since she never had the chance of having kids ( she married some old guy who didn’t wanted kids) now she goes and sleeps with whoever she pleases even if the guy it’s married with kids then when the guy doesn’t pay attention to her anymore she gets upset and cause the guy problems by telling the wife and blaming it on someone else .  Hey honey if you life it’s empty you can always adopt another dog or maybe do some more shopping or tell your husband you are tired of his old ax and get you a more age appropriate boyfriend/husband or at least be a woman and admit your mistakes instead of accusing someone else and in the process of trying to ruin the guys career and marriage.


likes: 0

204,212 My husband is away from home a huge amount of time for work.  Since I'm the one who runs the household, does the cooking, cleaning and laundry, runs the errands, maintains the lawn and takes care of the kids and pets, all while commuting and working full time, I do what I can to make things as easy as possible for me.  For example: the spices in the cabinet.  I have them arranged alphabetically.  I need sage?  It's on the right.  Cinnamon?  On the left.  Garlic in the middle.  You get the picture.

He was home for a few days.  We mostly ordered in or went out, and he made a nice dinner.  I remember him saying he had straightened up the spice cabinet.  He left yesterday.  Tonight I was making dinner and needed paprika.  I couldn't find it - it wasn't where it belonged.  I saw that my husband had rearranged the spices.  He didn't just take some out of the cabinet and not put them back in the right place, and he didn't simply straighten them up - they were completely rearranged.  Cinnamon was now all the way on the right.  The paprika was all the way on the left, along with red pepper flakes and chili powder.  I keep all the mixes/unique things (like jerk seasoning, lemon pepper, Old Bay and Adobo) on the left.  They were all over the place.

This is the third time he's done this.  As I was re-re-arranging them, I suddenly remembered.  He told me the last time he did this - last year - that he likes them arranged by color.  Red, green, white, yellow, brown.  He's rarely here, and when he is, I usually do most of the cooking, but HE likes them arranged his way.  *Sigh*


likes: 2
comments: 10

204,211 When I try to talk to my father about the abuse I suffered as a child and my severe, crippling ptsd, he makes jokes about it. I’m getting the message loud and clear that my parents don’t care if I live or die. And he tries to say it’s my fault he couldn’t be there for me as a child. Like i was 12 years old but somehow I prevented you, a grown ass man, from fulfilling your parental duties? How is that sensical? My dad abandoned his family when I was very young and now he wants to waltz back into my life and completely ignore the fact that we barely know each other and pretend he was a model parent. He is such a coward. That is not what a man is supposed to do.


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,210 When something doesn't go my wife's way at work, she comes home and yells at me and the boys.She's such a sucky immature person.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,209 I have never told anyone this, including my husband, not sure why.

The summer after high school graduation in 2002, I had a temp job in an office. It wasn't anything stressful or high impact, just something to save a little money before college. There were some permanent employees in the office who were in their early 20's. They'd buy me and my friends alcohol, and once in awhile I tagged along with another employee in his late teens to some of their parties.

There were also a few other temp employees. One of them was in his 50's and seemed like someone who would have the loneliest and most pathetic life ever.....if it weren't for the other temp employee. This guy was maybe mid-20's and looked like the fat guy from Office Space and Newman from Seinfeld had a baby. He mostly talked about how his dad was a big shot Executive VP at the company this office was a branch of (and yet his father seemed to think he was only capable of being a temp at his company...red flag #1). Harmless enough guy, but a few times I caught him standing around my car in the parking lot, like trying to look in it, and once flat out asked me if I had a lot of sex.

Then one Monday, not long before I scheduled to leave for college, the weird temp employee didn't show up. No one said anything, so I didn't think anything of it. Tuesday, didn't show up. Wednesday, the office manager came over to our cubicle area and said the man had committed suicide. Apparently, he had left his car on in his garage and died from carbon monoxide poisoning. I said something like, "Oh, that sucks," and kind of went back to what I was doing. I wasn't to pretend to be all torn up over the death of someone who I really didn't know, and frankly, was creeped out by.

Later that day, I passed through the break room and heard the office manager saying to another employee, "I think he was in love with her and couldn't take the rejection." They quieted their conversation when they turned to see me. The office manager asked if I was doing ok, I said "Yeah, sure," and went about my day. Well, went about my life, really. A few weeks later, I went to college and moved on to the next part of my life.

But every few years, I'll sometimes think about this guy and wonder if I was the "her" the office manager was talking about and if I was the last straw for this guy before he offed himself. I don't feel bad or anything, just curious.

I do kind of feel bad I don't remember his name, though.


likes: 0
comments: 32

204,208 I just realized that aside from my very small immediate family, I don’t really matter to anyone.


likes: 0
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204,207 Him: Did you adopt your dog?
Me: No. He is my biological dog.


likes: 7
comments: 3

204,206 I would never date/married another guy older than me . I don’t care how successful or wealthy you are , we are at different stages on life and I still want to have fun , explore things , have a life that doesn’t involve “relaxing “ at home . If you are 10 years and older don’t even bother trying to ask me out on a date the answer will be no . I would rather go in a 8 hour hike than going out in a date with you.


likes: 2

204,205 Twitter is has been off line several hours today. I wonder if some people really get scared or nervous. I don't really care because I don't make a living from social media, but if I did I guess I'd be worried. Makes you realize that our infrastructure is very open to attack...or taken offline for any reason.


likes: 1
comments: 5

204,203 Practically the second my husband and I moved into our nice new house, we started getting calls from my mother in law and her friends trying to arrange “visits”, that would of course really be all expenses paid vacations at our home.  At one point, MIL actually wanted us to provide some church acquaintance with free room and board while he looked for a job in our city and “tried to get back on his feet,” which sounded like a squatter situation just waiting to happen.  Dear MIL does just love to “help people!” She really loves helping when she can delegate all the actual effort of helping to someone other than herself.

So we’re always right in the middle of “fixing up the place.”  Right now we’re just about to get started putting in a new deck.  Yep, just about to get started.  Constant construction for at least the next few years. Just about to get started.

What she doesn’t know is that we’d sell the place and move before we let any of her freeloaders through the door, the silly old bint.


likes: 1
comments: 1

204,202 Hey (daughter), do you know how GREAT your Mommy FUCKS?!



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204,201 I used to be so afraid of my hairline receding , even a little bit, because I thought it was like pulling a thread on a shirt.  Like right when it starts, VRRRRRROOP, it doesn't stop until you are completely bald.


likes: 3
comments: 4

204,200 My neighbors sprays their lawns with chemical shit to get rid of the weeds. They are poisoning their kids, their dog and themselves. But eh, who cares, as long as the grass looks good.


likes: 2
comments: 2

204,199 Flukes lay on their right sides. Flounders lay on their left sides. Knowledge like this makes me a chick magnet.


likes: 4
comments: 8

204,198 The current rage in my town is to hire a cat behaviorist. The specialist comes to your home and uses psychology to make your cat a better person, or something like that. $150 per hour. God do I fucking hate living here. It's everything that's wrong with the world.


likes: 2
comments: 8

204,197 Why do things break when you can least afford to fix them?


likes: 2
comments: 1

204,196 Nobody cares about your feelings. People want what they want and they may love you, but no one really cares if they hurt you or make you mad. No respect or consideration


likes: 2
comments: 3

204,195 I fell for it again. This guy, I like him.  I don't like just anyone. First guy in a long time.  He says all these sweet things,  seems so great, then he disappears. :(  I feel so bad right now


likes: 1
comments: 3

204,194 You cant have a mid-life crisis if your entire life is a crisis.


likes: 3
comments: 1

204,193 I don't know how men can wear a suit. I sweat like a pig when I'm in a suit. I could never work a white collar job. I am destined to always work outdoors with my hands.


likes: 1
comments: 8

204,192 The girl's soccer team, let's be clear, they have no pride in their country. They are complaining cause they want more money. That's what's it's all about, money money money.


likes: 2
comments: 2
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204,191 When you blew out your birthday candles today, I wonder if you wished for me.


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,190 I do NOT want this Elvis movie to happen. No one is handsome or talented enough. No one. Harry Styles wants to be him... and .G-Eazy? COME ON!


likes: 2
comments: 5

204,189 I went for a 45 minute walk today and felt like I could collapse. I'm terribly out of shape. More tomorrow, if I'm still alive.


likes: 3
comments: 3

204,188 I decided to try intermittent fasting. I didn’t have terribly high hopes. I expected that I would feel like crap for a few days and then I would feel better. I hoped that I would gradually lose weight and that I would be able to stick to it long enough to make a difference.

Well, it has turned out to be better than I expected. I only felt like crap for one day. After that, I actually feel BETTER than usual. I have more energy and fewer headaches. And the weight loss has been much faster and easier than I expected.

But another thing I wasn’t expecting:   ... explosive diarrhea.


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,187 I've been watching and reading a lot of stuff on body language and what to look for if somebody is interested in you.  Apparently, if you make eye contact with somebody who isn't interested in you, they'll turn their head to the side away from you.  But if somebody's interested in you and you catch them looking at you, that somebody will look down.

I was sitting in the common area at work when the team my work crush is on started to walk by.  One guy walked by.  I looked up.  He looked to the side.  A second guy walked by.  I looked up, he looked to the side.  My crush walked by.  I looked up... he looked down.

Too bad it's socially unacceptable for women to make the first move.


likes: 0
comments: 13

204,186 I have a crush on someone and I’m thinking about telling them today.


likes: 3
comments: 3

204,185 I'll bet toll collectors steal money. How could they not? They are being handed cash all day and they are alone in the toll booth.


likes: 1
comments: 6

204,184 People laugh at me for believing in astrology but for the last few weeks we been having so many planets going retrograde with mercury starting in the beginning of these month and what a mess . We had like 4 electronics going wonky, a lot of people are having relationships problems, medical problems or work problems and don’t get me started in those recent athletes who died very unexpectedly or had a freak accident.  I’ll be happy when summer it’s over and the planets go back to normal, I can only handle so many things going wrong at the same time , it’s been one thing after another.


likes: 4
comments: 9

204,183 My friend and I banged a few times.  Now he thinks he can call me to come fuck even when he hasn't looked for me or tried to talk to me. We were all at a party and I've been noticing he talks to my cousin a lot. I feel like he finds excuses to talk to her, but she also does it feels like. I'm very good at body language and vibes, I don't sense major fire or chemistry but idk I feel like if each of them keeps feeding into it... I love her but I think she enjoys the attention from him. He doesn't go up to girls, they come to him, which makes me think she's sending a vibe that makes him feel comfortable to do that. I don't wanna be with him. But I don't like any of this. We fucked, keep your boundaries. The other thing bothering me is that he doesn't look for me. He never came to talk to me at the party, he doesn't try to hang out, but he's around my cousin every time I saw her. He claimed since we did it in secret he didn't wanna draw attention but I think he's full of shit.  Plus he smoked some of her stuff, that was weird to me. Like, oh you smoked together? In front of me but still, who initiated that? Yes you will say I'm making a lot of assumptions,  but I learned in my early 20s that I have been right every time when it came to these types of things, vibes and body language. When people said I was thinking to deep into it, we'd find out a year later that I was right.


likes: 0
comments: 10

204,181 Let me just come out and say it--G-eazy is fucking HOT.  Don't agree? Okay that is cool. But I would most definitely not mind his sexy ass being on top of and inside of me. Mmmmmmm. 34f


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,180 I’m blown away by news I got tonight. My husband’s best friend & his wife split - they have been together for 30 years!! They are 51 & 52 YO. They were on vacation with family and friends (we couldn’t go as we are vacationing later this year). He was constantly on his cell, so when he went to take a shower she snooped and that was it! Busted! All Hell broke loose and flew home home & immediately moved out. The secret: this dick used to hit on me all the time but I was too scared to tell my husband and start WW3! My husband would have went ballistic! We all hang together and I wasn’t about to start trouble. I asked my hubby so what do you think about this mess? He tells me, if he was cheating he would have told me. Yeah, right! Text messages don’t lie (but obviously this dick is denying and playing it off). I’m still keeping my mouth shut- karma took care of it in the end. So sorry for her and their young daughters.


likes: 2
comments: 3

204,176 I’m slowly quitting drinking. When I go out, I do more activities that don’t involve drinking. I stopped going out drinking entirely. For a while now, I’ve limited myself to one drink when I’m on a date.

I’m still drinking too much and too often though. I’m safer and it’s less expensive since I mostly do it at home but I’m still not doing this in a healthy way. My next steps are to stop bringing alcohol home and every other date skip the drink. I’m also getting more social interaction and staying away from overwork.

I tried talking to professionals about it and AA members but it just made me feel worse in general. I think what needs to happen is to continue to decrease it slowly, explore better coping mechanisms for stress, and continue taking those stress levels down and then, of course, don’t put the drink to my lips.

A thought just occurred to me: I quit smoking cigarettes years ago, I can quit this. With smoking, I found my triggers and substituted healthier means of coping. I could do the same thing here. Aha! Bingo.


likes: 8
comments: 2

204,175 I hate it but I've learned to talk over my wife or she'll never let me get a word in.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,174 When I take an Advil for a headache, it kicks in 20 minutes later. But weirdly, the headache tries to fight back. At the 19th minute it gets really bad, the worst it's been all day. It's like the headache is a living entity and it doesn't want to die, so it struggles and kicks and screams to stay alive. But a minute later, the Advil triumphs and ahhh, relief.


likes: 2
comments: 3

204,173 I'm beginning to think an arranged marriage would be so much easier.


likes: 2
comments: 4

204,172 I'd turn down a naked and throbbing Zac Efron just to eat delicious cheese pizzas all week and not suffer the consequences.


likes: 2
comments: 9

204,171 Candice Brown is by far my favorite babe from the Great British Baking Show on PBS.


likes: 2
comments: 1

204,170 Tomorrow I will 99.9% sure get a job offer. The job will have great benefits and be significantly more money than I've ever made.

So I should be on cloud 9, right? But I'm not. The job I just left was the same thing...great benefits and pay, but the job itself sucked ass. The benefits and pay were the only way they could keep people.

I sure hope I'm not walking into that situation again. I'm nervous and scared.

Man, I hope this works out.


likes: 3
comments: 4

204,169 People whose rush hour commutes include intentional left hand turns against traffic on busy streets are either incredibly selfish or incredibly stupid, or more likely, both.


likes: 2
comments: 1

204,168 My wife looks at houses we can't possibly afford to buy. She feels like a big shot, at least for a little while.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,166 I'm so poor I think a can of tuna is a luxury.


likes: 1
comments: 5

204,165 I don't think enough people understand that a mother NEEDS her son's penis inside her!  It's NATURE'S way!


likes: 1
comments: 5
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204,164 I purge pretty much 24/7... Not really a binger. Anything I eat or drink needs to come out. As long as I can get away with it. After meals my husband goes outside for a cigarette, I take advantage of this to go vomit. My blood pressure is always low. I'm exhausted all the time... I'm tired of it. I need help, but I'm scared of going into treatment. I know I need it. But it just does not feel like an option at this moment.


likes: 0
comments: 2

204,163 SB  Is so hot! the other day, she spread her legs, let me lick her ass while she played with a dildo.


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,162 Most people I know have a simple password for their phone.  Mine is 8888 because it's very easy to enter. I see others use 1111. My sister users the month and day of her birthday.

I have a son. He's very smart. He's on track to be the valedictorian of his high school. I had to borrow his phone. I asked for his password.

He said, "It's easy to remember, 1618."

I thought about it. It couldn't be a birthday. I don't know of anything that happened in the year 1618. It has nothing to do with our zip code or area code. I was baffled. I asked why those digits are his password.

He very calmly explained it's:

1 plus the square root of 5, all that divided by 2.


Well that clears it up...



likes: 3
comments: 3

204,161 For the past month I've been nauseous. I constantly feel like puking. I've found the only thing that leads to a slight improvement is keeping my stomach empty. Therefore I have eaten very little. The hunger pains are not as bad as the nausea. My wife tells me to go to the doctor. I will. At some point. But so far I have lost 22 pounds. If I keep this up for another month I'll be down 40 pounds which is my ideal weight. Then I'll go to the doctor.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,160 My family goes on and on and on about how gay is "wrong" blah blah blah.......well they can kiss my ass. Gay people have been the only ones who were nice to me when everyone else was extremely cruel tome. It was always them who came through and "got me". Did they forget? Honestly if it were not for some of my fabulous friends I might not even be here , it was THAT bad. Judge people on their character, and character only. Maybe someday we'll all get that.


likes: 4
comments: 6

204,159 I hate that I have a crush on her.  She's 20 damned years younger than me!  I hate it because I've built her up in my head to be a person I want her to be.  I'm old enough to know that that's what a crush is - it's all in my head and reality is way different.  I'm emotionally lonely and trying to find anything to make me feel emotionally fulfilled, and for some damned reason my thoughts have been staying on this young lady, as if she somehow can solve everything.  I barely even know her but I can't stop thinking about her and it's pissing me off.


likes: 5
comments: 7

204,158 I was never in a sorority. Why would I want to be with a bunch of catty girls? I'm told they are your friends for life and help you. Help me with what? The girls I knew in sororities got married and don't work. They lead simple lives raising kids and trading cookie recipes I guess with their friends for life sorority sisters. Waste of time. Waste of a life.


likes: 4
comments: 6

204,157 I haven't smoked pot in five years, yet whenever I say something unusual, someone always asks me if I'm high. It's very insulting. It's just my natural personality. Stop making fun of me. I'm not high. I'm just being myself. Jerks.


likes: 4
comments: 1

204,156 My wife gets frantic when it's been 3,000 miles and the dashboard light comes on saying it's time to change the oil. She wants me to stop everything and take care of it. She acts like the car will suddenly seize up and burn in a ball of flames. She'll remind me 20 times in the course of the day. She won't let it go until the oil is change. It's as annoying as fuck. Ladies, nothing bad will happen to your car if the oil isn't instantly changed!


likes: 2
comments: 3

204,155 There are so many stains on my mattress. I try not to think about it when I'm snuggled in bed.


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,154 I’ve read that in every life there is a moment of trauma that breaks you into pieces. I think I know what mine was, but I’m afraid to say for fear that life will show me something worse.


likes: 2
comments: 7

204,153 There is nowhere less cooperative or with fewer feelings of community or shared sacrifice than a rush-hour highway.


likes: 5
comments: 3

204,152 What the fuck is up with iphones. I'm new to this world of texting. My phone has a passcode - I thought - so no one can see my texts.

But Apple has this bizarre design feature. When a text comes in, even if the phone is turned off, the text message shows up on my screen. Or alot of it does. The passcode has to be entered to see the entire text. But what the fuck was Apple thinking by letting anyone passing by my desk to see even part of the text? Like the first 5 lines of the text. These are private texts. No one should be allowed to see any part of them except me after I enter the passcode.

Please tell me there's a way around this.


likes: 1
comments: 10

204,151 There was a construction accident in my town. It was caused by sloppiness and could have been very bad but luckily it was caught in the nick of time before it got too far out of control.

When I heard about it I suggested town officials put the brakes on the project for a week so the safety rules could be reviewed. I was ignored.

This surprised me. There have been mishaps in the past and projects have been put on hold. So what was the difference this time? Why isn't this particular project being forced to slow down....

Oh.... the project is being done by a builder who also happens to be a town official.

See how that works. If a private builder has a mishap, it's all hands on deck to review the project safety.

But if it's a town official running the project for his own profit motives, then who cares about the safety of residents. Time is money and the project must not be delayed.

Our world is so corrupt.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,150 I hate the English more than anyone. Such condescending twats.

You'd think they'd be a little more humble seeing their Empire peaked 200 years ago.


likes: 2
comments: 8

204,149 I've been sick for a few days. Cold-like symptoms with some GI stuff as well. Getting over it, and today my ear has that clogged up thing going on. That hasn't happened since I was a kid. However, it has also been draining a bit. Clear yellow-ish red-ish fluid. I am sure it is a part of the illness, but I can't help but think it could be cerebrospinal fluid leaking from my skull.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,148 Don’t wait until you’re on your deathbed to tell people how you feel.

Tell them to fuck off now.


likes: 10
comments: 5

204,147 I know some people who spent $120,000 to send their daughter to an elite private high school for four years.

Then they spent $250,000 to send this daughter to a top name university.  Not an Ivy League school, just a good school with a good name.

The daughter graduated two years ago.  She's been making $50,000 a year for an IT company as a code tester.  It might not even be that much.

I'm the first to say that people can spend their money anyway or anyhow they want... but where is the logic in spending close to $400,000 for a child who would be making the same money had they gone to public high school, and then transferred to a state school after two years at a community college?

The parents could have saved themselves $320,000, and then put that money into the stock market for her.  In 20 years that daughter would have had $1.25 million in the bank.  By the time she was 50 the daughter could be living off the interest and pursuing whatever dream she wanted.

It ain't my money... but I don't understand some people.


likes: 4
comments: 9

204,146 You graduated from college a year ago. You spent all of Daddy's  savings to go to college. Here it is a year later and you are looking to get a job as a pet sitter?

Do you realize how selfish you have been? Daddy's retirement saving are gone thanks to you. You could have at least worked towards a professional career so you might think of paying him back one day. You are the definition of a cunt.


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,145 I was recently told I have a disease. It's hitting me pretty hard. I'm tired all the time, my fingers and toes become numb, I get these phantom pains, and I often have a headache.

I didn't want my wife to know. It would be too frustrating to deal with her. She doesn't know when to shut up. She would talk about it non-stop. Whereas I'm trying not to dwell on it. She would also tell her friends and get sympathy for herself. So I held out on telling her.

But she started complaining I was sleeping too much. She was mean about it. I finally gave in and told her. I said directly to her face that I didn't want her to tell anyone. She promised.

Yesterday I answered the phone. It's a friend of my wife. The woman immediately says, "So sorry, I heard about your illness..."

Being married to my wife is worse than the disease.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,144 Had a fucking gout attack. Spent the whole holiday weekend waiting for my knee to shrink back to a normal size.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,141 i drink right out of the carton but it's okay because only boys have germs and i'm a girl.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,140 I have no respect for anyone who can spend all day at the beach just sitting there. They must be really stupid and have nothing more interesting to do.


likes: 0
comments: 11
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204,139 The woman who runs our local tag sale group on Facebook is a Nazi. She has all these rules and if you don't obey or even dare to question anything, she boots you out of the group. I think being the Admin of the Facebook group is the only thing she has going for her in life.


likes: 1
comments: 5

204,138 I could see myself killing someone who pissed me off. I have a short fuse.


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,137 My wife was driving to Vermont for the weekend. I couldn't go with her. She asked if I wanted anything while she was there. She suggested maple syrup.  I passed on the syrup but I asked if she could get me Frosted Flakes, the cereal. She looked confused. I explained how it's colder in Vermont. They get more frost than other places. They really understand frost. They are the country's frost experts. They use that knowledge to make the best Frosted Flakes. So could she please get a box for me.

She told me she had no idea about about any of that.

A few days later she came home with a box of fresh Vermont Frosted Flakes for me.

I'm mean.


likes: 0
comments: 2

204,136 There's a concert coming up in Detroit where black people and white people pay a different price for their tickets.

Black People $10
White People $20

Can I do that in my restaurant? Can I charge black people more? Would that be okay?

No?

But black people can do it to me?

https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/afro-fest-tiny-jag-detroit-153825185.html


likes: 1
comments: 13

204,135 My mom's Parkinson's is making me seasick with her swaying and twitching.  She has an infection on her lower jaw and isn't wearing her plate and is licking and clicking.  I am about to lose my mind.

I am alone with her and am so lost.


likes: 1
comments: 4

204,134 My 12 y.o. daughter went away to sleep away camp today for the next few weeks. My day-to-day life will go on its normal humdrum way during this time, which is fine with me, but man, I hope she has the time of her life!


likes: 6
comments: 2

204,133 A relative of mine was affluent for many years. House in the mountains, beach house, luxury cars, private school for the kids, you get the idea. She loves to look down her nose and say things like “If people on welfare just tried a little harder, they could have the things I do,” “Well, God’s just blessed me,” and other terrible and ignorant shit.

Apparently her husband (soon to be ex) had not been paying their taxes for the last decade. The authorities have now caught on. The vacation houses - sold. Kids - public school. They sold one of their cars, but she still kept hers because she was too embarrassed about her friends knowing what happened.She is relying on her siblings to buy her groceries to feed the kids because she refuses to get public assistance. She’s slowly learning there aren’t many places who want someone who’s last gig was being a stay at home mom for the last 15 years.  

My husband’s and my secret? We’re delighted about this. Maybe she should just try harder or hope her non-existent god comes through, and she can be a millionaire again.


likes: 3
comments: 0

204,132 I am divorced and disappointed. I kind of want to look again....but I kind of don't . It seems everything worked out for everyone else I know but me. It's hard to accept that I will probably be alone forever and never know what real love is. I act like I don't care in front of those I know...like I'll be alright...but secretly I am devastated.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,131 I had a really rough week and my boyfriend talked me through it. We had an amazing conversation that branched off into many topics. I looked at the clock and realized three hours had flown by. I had hoped he had been working on his project while we talked on the phone but it turned out he hadn’t because he needed to use his phone to film it. I didn’t realize he had put off filming to talk to me.

As soon as I figured that out I got off the phone but now I feel so bad! I thanked him for his help and told him how much I love him but that evening is gone. He said he was happy he could help and that he loves me, too but I feel so guilty! Baby, I’m so sorry. I really need to learn when to shut up.

When I see him tomorrow, I am going to suck his cock and lick his ass until he passes out and when he wakes up I’ll give him an amazing meal.


likes: 0
comments: 2

204,130 I need to get fucked in a cheap motel by somebody who longs for me


likes: 3
comments: 3

204,129 There's a new storage facility in town. It's right on the main drag. I think it would be great fun to go there at rush hour. I'd sling my wife over my shoulder with her hands tied and duct tape on her mouth, and walk into the storage facility, in full view of all the passing cars. It would finally give residents something to talk about other than their bowling scores.


likes: 1
comments: 1

204,128 When my divorce goes through, my wife might start shacking up with another guy. I fully plan to complain to her church. She's super religious. Shacking up is against the rules. She will be thrown off the church board, which would embarrass her terribly. But if she goes the other route and marries him, then I don't have to pay alimony. It's a win win for me.


likes: 3
comments: 4

204,127 I just woke up from a dream. In it, I had met a woman. It started casual; she was interested in history and architecture  and was admiring an old building i owned and was thinking of making into a four bedroom house. I was also showing her around other buildings I owned and found that we both had the same interests.

One of the old buildings was a church at one point, and it was converted into  little stores including a candy shop.   At one point we were near the entrance and a pervy guy was trying to get close to her and I was putting myself between them. I asked her if she wanted to see another building,  and she said yes and we walked away.

As we were walking,  we casually began to hold hands.  This woman was so beautiful.   She was wearing like a gray or blue tailored  business dress.  She was slim, had kind of a bleached bob haircut and best of she was funny, smart, and witty. For whatever reason, she had a knee problem and had trouble walking. I remember her saying something about maybe having to get her leg amputated. We had a connection and I was about to ask her out when I woke up. I am missing her a lot right now.


likes: 1
comments: 1

204,125 Sometimes I can fart 50 times in an hour. Where is it all coming from?


likes: 5
comments: 7

204,124 I've been getting ads for children's books like Chicka Chicka Boom Boom. I think Amazon needs to tweek their algorithm.

-66 year old gay man


likes: 1
comments: 4

204,123 I think about everything I say and do BEFORE I say or do it. Others should try this approach.


likes: 4
comments: 0

204,122 I've been spending all morning crying. I can't do this anymore.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,121 Congrats to the US Woman’s Soccer Team.   Too bad that they are such a low-class international embarrassment for the otherwise great sport of Football and very poor ambassadors for America.


likes: 12
comments: 14
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204,120 Half the qualification for being a famous orchestra conductor is to wear a black turtle neck.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,119 I find the Apple watch to be ugly. It might be a status symbol, but it certainly isn't a fashion statement.


likes: 2
comments: 2

204,118 Everyone left him. All his family abandoned him. His friends too. I only knew him distantly, but I thought it so sad. He is sick and no one will help him.

I stepped in. I thought it the right thing to do. The humane thing to do.

By an hour later I couldn't get out of there fast enough. OMG what a horrible person. Lesson learned. Sorry I doubted the family members and friends. Some people are beyond help.



likes: 0
comments: 1

204,117 Soccer looks kind of random to me. Half the time one team kicks it right to the other team. It doesn't look skillful. It reminds me of third graders kicking the soccer ball around on the school playground.


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,116 I'm so down in the dumps today that I can't even get out of bed. I've been crying on and off most of the morning. I am trying to pep talk myself into getting up to vacuum and eat something. I hate feeling this way.


likes: 1
comments: 1

204,115 Why can't I just use my boob as a mouse pad without being shamed? SMH


likes: 1
comments: 5

204,114 I've come across a few guys who served in the military and now they have very large toys. I'm talking like a $1 million dollar boat. How does an ordinary soldier have the ability to buy a $1 million boat?


likes: 0
comments: 8

204,113 I hate people who speak too slowly. Step up the pace a little you moron. I haven't got all day.


likes: 2
comments: 4

204,112 The British Ambassador to the U.S. should resign, or even better, he should be fired. He has embarrassed his nation and created a damaging rift between two allies. He has done the exact opposite of what an Ambassador should do. The irony being he tries to put down our leadership for bad behavior, while he himself has behaved worse than anyone. This person needs to go.


likes: 1
comments: 20
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204,111 Girls who play high school sports have fatter thighs. It's not a good look. I don't think it's worth it.


likes: 2
comments: 18

204,110 Just back from a family funeral and burial. My Mothers younger sister and a woman that lived a different life. She ditched her husband and 2 kids in her early thirties and from then on only dated younger men.
She was 16 years older than me and preferred guys my age. It was embarrassing for me back in the day to see and hear about that  from guys I went to school with.
This went on right up till she was about 70 with a 50 year old boyfriend. Family holidays were always interesting with May around. Although my mother disapproved, she was always included in all functions, and in family emergencies and issues was always there.
Not so much with her own kids who only re-connected to her in the final 10 years or so.
And yeah, when I was about 22 for a few times.


likes: 1
comments: 3

204,109 I'm looking to buy a house. Some guy a few blocks away is selling his house. I've always liked the look of his house. I tried to find the details online but there was nothing. Turns out he is selling the house himself without a broker. He is not on any of the real estate websites. The only thing he has is a FOR SALE BY OWNER sign out front with an email address.

Okay, I emailed him saying I was interested in learning more about his house and asked if he could send me price info and photos. A week later he writes back "Do you have any interest in buying my house?" I thought I made that clear in the first email, but okay, I responded and said possibly and asked again if he could send price info and photos.

He wrote back saying, "First, tell me what you want to pay."

How strange. I wrote back again saying, "I don't know what I want to pay or even if I want to pay, because I haven't seen the house. Could you send me some pictures?" He responded, "No. Make a bid and I'll send you pictures."

Ah, now I understand why this house is for FOR SALE BY OWNER. I feel for real state agents. They must have to deal with some real kooks out there.


likes: 2
comments: 10

204,108 My husband says he rarely dreams anymore from chronic cannabis use. That’s why I don’t smoke it. The only times I can see you now is in my dreams.


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,106 My financial situation is driving me insane. I am behind on almost everything, barely keeping my utilities on, my bank took away my overdraft protection because I was using it too much, I need a lawn mower but can't afford one. My landlord made a vague threat recently because I was consistently paying her two weeks late. It is so hard to find a roommate in my area. My last roommate still owes me $600 from last summer which I know I will never see. I just don't know what to do. The stress is eating away at me. I have no family around to help. Friends have offered to let me borrow money but the last time I did that it was so hard to pay them back that it just added more stress to my plate and I told myself I wouldn't do that again. My car will be paid off in a year and a half which will save me over $200 per month but I don't know how I will make it that long.


likes: 0
comments: 2

204,101 I have a married boyfriend. He is 16 years older than me and has made me cum way more times than all my previous boyfriends combined!


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,100 My wife will bring up an outing she wants to make, like going to her sister's on Saturday. I tell her I can't come because I have to work over the weekend. Still, every day leading up to the outing she mentions how we will go to her sister's. And every day I remind her I can't go. When Saturday comes around, she wakes me early and says let's go. I'm so baffled by her approach to life and people. I tell her for the final time I can't go. She then gets bent out of shape and huffs and puffs and won't talk to me for a week saying I broke my promise to go with her. Her act is getting very old very fast.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,099 I went to visit a friend. When I came back home he called and said his credit card was missing. He asked if I took it. WTF? Wow, I've never been so offended. Friendship over!


likes: 1
comments: 11

204,098 My husband and I went to see Criss Angel tonight (great guy, great show) what he doesn’t know is CA & I used to hook up back in the day; he’s from LI & I’m from NYC (his family were THE best people). Hubby & I used to watch his show on A&E- but I kept my mouth shut- my husband is jealous & it’s not worth the aggravation. Anyway, damn we both got old!! LOL! Glad he’s doing well in life he truly is a lovely guy.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,097 I’m sitting here drinking with my girlfriend and she said “ever since I got that abortion my pussy smells like cat food” man y’all got no idea what type of life I’m living


likes: 4
comments: 10
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204,096 We are married, but we communicate mostly by email and text. It's a game we both play. We want a paper trail for the divorce proceedings.


likes: 1
comments: 1

204,095 I hope no aid is sent to California. Nothing. They bash America over and over. But oh look, now they need our help. I don't want to see a single dime of tax dollars going their way.


likes: 2
comments: 13
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204,094 My ex turned out to be gay. Which is why he is my ex. I found out on a family vacation. When we were at home he stayed up late in the basement on the computer. I had no idea what he was doing down there. But when we were on vacation and staying in a hotel room and he insisted on staying up late after the kids and I went to bed, I became curious what was so urgent on the computer. At one point when he thought I was asleep, he went into the bathroom. I rushed over and looked at his computer screen. He was on a gay male chat forum. His screen handle was "Suck Me Suck You". I died a little right then. I took a photo with my phone. I couldn't start an argument with the kids there. I waited until we were back home. I asked if he was having gay sex chats with men. He swore he wasn't. I showed him the image on my phone. Hard to deny it. We got divorced. But when ever someone uses the word "suck", it makes me think of his screen name "Suck Me Suck You" and I get bothered all over again. Just now I googled his screen name. I see he's still at it.  


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,093 We finally had sex. It was really bad. She pushed me away from her pussy because she wanted to do it herself. She said it would be quicker and she needed to get up early. How romantic. Then once she completed her rushed chore of orgasm, she grabbed my cock and started jerking very hard and painfully. I had to slow her down. She then started and stopped and started and stopped. I could tell she was falling asleep. I waited months for this sex. I put up with such torment from her for all that time. Trying to salvage what was left from this disaster, I inserted myself in her and forced myself to cum in a minute just to get it over with. I am so done with her. She represents the worst sex I have ever had. Let her marry some other rich schmuck. He and I can go out sometime and laugh about her.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,092 Some people want to be the rose, others want to be the thorn.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,090 I feel your energy again but this time it is stronger. The wonderment. Wondering if you should make a move and then the pull back. It is so strong that I need to try to deflect it because I have to wait for you to come towards me.   I can feel your lust, your compassion, your fears and hoping not to be rejected. It won’t happen.....  Just find an excuse to text me or call me with you and let’s talk.


likes: 2
comments: 6

204,089 Don’t you hate it when you are talking to your partner in public , just to turn around and realize she/ he is not around ? Talk about awkward and embarrassing, they just leave you there talking to yourself, how inconsiderate and rude.


likes: 3
comments: 0

204,088 My sister-in-law and her husband took in an exchange student so they could get paid a stipend. The poor girl. The house was an endless pig sty. Other exchange students in the town were staying at McMansions with swimming pools. But this kid had to sleep in a storage room and risk catching a disease when using the bathroom. I felt so bad for her. I'll bet she was glad to return to South America.


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,087 A few months ago I received a picture in the mail of an old lady. There was a phone number on the back. It took me a while to realize it was my mother. I haven't seen her since I was a kid. I suppose the number was a hint I should call. Turns out today is her birthday. She's 80 something. I don't think I'll call. Too complicated. No sense digging up the past.


likes: 0
comments: 7

204,086 This is not so much a secret, but a question for those of you in the US military. When a veteran dies, and chooses to be buried in their uniform, should he/she be buried with their medals? I was told by military personnel that taking the medals off before burial was like stripping them of their accomplishments. Thoughts?


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,085 My daughter is not turning out to be the girl I'm trying to raise her to be. I have to face the fact, that no matter how many times I've forgiven her for lying to me, and tried to trust her, she'll never stop. She's now 13, and I never know when to believe her and when not to. When caught in a lie, she always says "I knew I'd get in trouble if I told you." Yes, but now you're in MORE trouble because you lied about the issue that was going to get you in trouble in the first place! I worry so much about her. My son, who is now 20, has always been the ideal child. Never a minute of trouble out of him. I fully thought she'd be the same. I mean, her dad and I have RAISED her the same...

I'm at my wits end. I'm losing sleep. I don't know what else to do. I want so much to trust her, but I just can't.


likes: 0
comments: 10

204,084 "I want blueberries. Go out and get me some."

"But you already have blueberries in the refrigerator."

"They are a day old. I don't want old stale blueberries. I want new blueberries."

"Sorry, but I think you should first finish what's in the fridge."

"You are an awful man. My father would get my mother blueberries if she asked. You are nothing like my father. I hate you."

I wish I never married her.


likes: 0
comments: 7
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204,083 Migraines suck. I wish they would stop. :(


likes: 0
comments: 8

204,082 She needs to hate me. No matter how much good I do, she'll find something wrong and come after me for it. I don't know if it's related, but her mother died when she was young. I think it came out as a hatred of men. She was angry her mother died instead of her father. She resented all men for this. They must be punished for the death of her mother (even though her mother died of natural causes). All these years later I'm the man in her life so I too must constantly be maligned.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,081 I've learned to hate dealing with my wife. She does this thing. She wants to get her way. No matter what. She will scream and yell and say whatever it takes in order to get her way. The concerning part is, she'll do this over inconsequential things. We'll be driving along. I'll see a McDonalds and suggest we quickly stop in and get some lunch. She'll see a Burger King across the street and demand we stop there instead. I tell her McDonalds is on our side of this busy street, so it's just easier to go to McDonalds and I hope she doesn't mind too much. Right? It really doesn't matter which one we go to, but McDonalds is easier.

Out come the fangs. He tells me I'm an idiot, everyone knows Burger King is better. I'm a horrible person. She wishes she never married me.

All because McDonalds is on our side of the street.

It's like some mental condition where her reaction doesn't match the situation at hand. She makes things far too intense. She turns the outrage dial to 10 on something so trivial. Because no matter what the cost, she needs to get her way. It makes life very difficult.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,080 I’ve been too available.  It’s time for that to end. Go play out your warped little fantasy.  I’m done.


likes: 5
comments: 0

204,079 It really annoys me how girls are portrayed as so feeble in the movies. They trip while running away. They cry when they really need to be quiet. The audience is conditioned to see them as dingbats.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,078 Last week my husband and I were talking about food and cooking. For whatever reason, bay leaves came up. I mentioned that they're used for flavoring, should be put into whatever you're cooking whole, and removed - because they have the potential to scratch or get lodged in the throat or digestive tract.

Today, he spent several hours making an elaborate dinner for me. I laid out all of the herbs and spices he needed - including bay leaves. He made two portions, and cut them into slices. After a few bites, I felt...something...poking in the back of my throat. I reached in and pulled out a piece of bay leaf. There were small pieces of the chopped leaves in there. I didn't notice him having any discomfort, and I didn't say anything (mainly because he takes things too personally), but I spent the rest of dinner cautiously looking for more.

I'm hoping he just forgot what it was I'd said about them. He's been acting kind of strange lately...


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,077 I hate rich people because they are so arrogant. But mainly I hate them because I'm jealous I'm not one of them.


likes: 3
comments: 1

204,076 I just watched the entire season 3 of Stranger Things in one sitting.


likes: 2
comments: 10

204,075 My friend's mom had lung cancer. She was really pleased it was causing her to lose weight. "Don't I look great?" she would ask. "Skinniest I've ever been." Some people can always see the positive. She died, but I've always remembered her attitude.


likes: 2
comments: 1

204,074 I think it would be funny to put a bunch of things in my husband's car trunk. Black plastic garbage bags, duct tape, rope, a shovel... I'd like to see him talk his way out of this one.


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,073 My wife was in the middle of giving me a blow job when she looked up and said, "You've gained weight."

She is the opposite of sexy.


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,072 I love living in Los Angeles. There is never a dull moment here.


likes: 1
comments: 13

204,071 Not everyone believes in the holocaust. A principal recently got himself in hot water for saying this out loud. We are not a free society. There are somethings you are not allowed to say. There are some beliefs you are not allowed to have. To all you jewish bullies, fuck you.


likes: 0
comments: 32
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204,070 I work two jobs. One is 40 hours a week. The other is only 20 hours. My wife thinks I should take on more hours at the second job. She has no job at all. I came home the other night. Opened the fridge looking for a quick bite before heading to bed. I was smacked in the face with the stench of something rotting. I asked my wife what that was. She said she's been smelling it for a few days. I asked if she thought to do something about it. She said she'd take a look over the weekend to see what's rotting. I think she's too busy these days watching TV.........


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,069 So why do pharmacists think that HIPAA does not apply to them?!?!
Why do I have to be the bad guy for asking that they don't announce to everyone within feet behind me, what I take!?
I'm getting fucking fed up! If they think people can't hear, well news to you, we hear other people's info!


likes: 4
comments: 6

204,068 I planned to wait until the GOT series was finished and then just watch the whole thing. But now it seems like such a big commitment. I’m not sure I’m prepared to take it on.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,067 I love you


likes: 1
comments: 4

204,066 When I was a kid (maybe 12 or 13) I would walk to visit my friend at his house regularly. Sometimes I'd take the shortcut through the cemetery. One day I was running and in a hurry, I tripped on a loose stone and fell down. I don't know why but for some reason I looked for the stone I tripped over and picked it up and on the other side, it had my birthday on it. Birth year and all. That's probably the freakiest thing that has ever happened to me .


likes: 4
comments: 2

204,064 My friends always tease me about my regular use of sunscreen, but the truth is I can see some of them starting to show signs of skin damage because they don’t use sunscreen, and I don’t want skin cancer or premature aging. Sorry gals, but a tan doesn’t look good on me and just doesn’t seem worth getting spots and wrinkles for *shrugs*


likes: 0
comments: 11

204,063 People are ridiculous.





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comments: 20
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204,062 She hired her 16 year old son to build a website. That's fine if it was her money. But she used government money allocated to her department. That's not cool. You can't hire your son.


likes: 0
comments: 7
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204,061 Now what?  


likes: 0
comments: 12

204,059 I can feel your energy. It is so strong. Just walk past me and confirm it and then we will go from there.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,058 I will never pay for extra money, coins, lives, etc. for online or cell phone games. There are plenty of other free games to download if you don't give me enough free coins to play until I am done playing for the day.


likes: 5
comments: 2

204,057 I cooked the corn too long. I cooked it for 5 minutes in boiling water. My wife scolded me in her angry voice, "Everyone knows you only cook corn for one minute. What's wrong with you. You ruined it."

1) I cooked dinner. I always cook dinner. Her job is to be the food critic.

2) I looked it up on the internet. Plenty of people say you cook corn for 5 minutes.

3) Aren't there bigger things to worry about instead of coming after me for EVERYTHING I do. She's such a miserable person.



likes: 2
comments: 7

204,056 I wish I could be medicated every day so I can't feel anything mentally. I wish I could blot the world out.

F, 50


likes: 2
comments: 1

204,055 "I spilled some sauce in her taco."

I hate the office where I work.


likes: 2
comments: 6

204,054 I saw a woman breast feeding her child in the supermarket yesterday. She pulled down the shoulder strap on her dress, popped out her boob and let the kid suck away while she continued walking the aisles and shopping. Her entire bob was exposed for all to see. I'm sorry, but this is wrong. What a classless woman. Can't you be a little more discreet??


likes: 5
comments: 21
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204,053 Ew. That black woman licking the container of ice cream and putting it back on the store shelf. Ew ew ew. What the hell is wrong with people.


likes: 1
comments: 15

204,052 No matter what plans we make, no matter how much I insist we need to be there on time, my wife will make us an hour late.


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,051 Our local elected representative hired some interns for the summer. There is a picture of him in the paper surrounded by four young college boys. They are huddled close together looking over a document.

This elected official is in his early 50s. He has never been married. Strange, year after year no females ever get hired to be his intern... ya know what I'm saying...


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,050 My mom called and asked what I'm doing today. I told her, "My cousin is coming over." She likes my cousin. She thinks he's a good hearted guy. But to be more correct, I should have told her, "My cousin is coming over and over."


likes: 4
comments: 1

204,049 I guess my prevailing thought is how can I go through one part of the day thinking so hard and so longingly for someone that it basically brings me to tears wondering whether I should try getting back with her and..
..later after a few tokes realizing quite vividly how incredibly isolating and angry she was towards me nearly every day that we were together.
That's what stops me right in my tracks from ever trying to go back.
Life is lonely and love and relationships are so confusing.


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,048 I regret marrying him.


likes: 1
comments: 5

204,047 I was invited to go swimming in my neighbors pool today. But it's that time of the month and I can't risk it.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,046 Meghan McCain should consider breast reduction surgery. My gosh they are big.


likes: 1
comments: 3
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204,045 It's the 4th of July. My wife left at about 7 this morning with her bike in the car. She's meeting up with bicycling workout friends. They are riding 50 miles. Then they will be going on a hike.  This evening they are hanging out and watching fireworks at someone's condo on a ski slope. Sounds like a perfect day for her.

Me, I'll be taking care of our three children. I'll be making them  breakfast, lunch and dinner. I have watermelon, hotdogs and smores. I think I'll make water balloons. I have some stretchy rubber tubing. I'll show them how to make a catapult for the balloons. I also purchased some roman candles and giant sparklers. We'll light them up in the back yard after dark. Sounds like it will be a good day for us too.

I'm constantly amazed though at how disinterested my wife is in her own family. My children don't have a mother. There is a lady in gym clothes who shows up now and then to change, before going out again with her gym friends.


likes: 0
comments: 8

204,044 Everyone loves to hate on Wikipedia. I'm not sure why. They claim it's unreliable. I've found the opposite, that it is an excellent source of good information.


likes: 2
comments: 8

204,043 Civilized people do not use port-a-potties.


likes: 0
comments: 2

204,042 He has decided to stop eating. Now it's a 10 day vigil as he starves to death. I think it will be even quicker. He is too weak to last 10 days without food. I still remember riding bikes with him up to 7-11 and getting super sized slurpees. That was 30 years ago. Now I get to watch him die. Life can be so joyful yet so sad.


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,041 I had to take the wife for a bit of a drive yesterday in the heat. On the return trip she asked if we could stop in Chick fil-A for dinner. She tells me she'll go in and get the food. I can wait in the air conditioned car. Great.

She gets back in the car a few minutes later. I start off down the highway.  She starts eating. I wait patiently for a minute and then ask "Where's mine?"

She didn't get me one. She forgot. This is so typical of my wife. She never forgets to think of herself. But me, I'm just the guy who does all the work. Why bother thinking about me....


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,040 Went to a fireworks show last night, got there early to reserve a spot for myself and friends.  I had a ton of time to people watch.  What struck me was how many women wore really short dresses which flashed their goods when sitting or bending.  What was more shocking to me was how many forgot to wear underwear.
F 51 and not a prude


likes: 2
comments: 4

204,039 Last summer I restored an old unused car and put it back on the road. I registered it with DMV, got insurance, and had it inspected. At that time I also went into my local tax assessors office and told them about the car. They said not to worry, they will come up with a value and add it to my tax bill. So I did everything by the book.

Now it's a year later. I recently received my new tax bill. The car still wasn't on it. I went in to the tax assessor. They said they will fix it and send me a new bill. They did. But with a penalty of several hundred dollars for failure to pay taxes on the car last year.

Like what in fucking hell????? I did everything I was supposed to do. They screwed up. They forgot to charge me. How about they pay me a penalty for being incompetent!!!!! No, I have to pay a penalty for their mistake. I fucking hate bureaucracy.


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,038 Boycott Nike.


likes: 1
comments: 11
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204,037 A friend recently came out as transgender.  She gets upset when people use her 'dead name'.  Sorry, I've known you by XXX for 35 years.  Drank beers, played Fantasy Football, etc.  Give me more than 2 months and intermittent contact to remember XXX-a.  OK?  Believe me when I say we are all coming from a place of support but we are human.


likes: 1
comments: 5
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204,036 So sexy when a woman helps me put my cock in her ass. She grabs the shaft and guides it into place. It tells me she really wants to be ass fucked.


likes: 4
comments: 1

204,035 My wife promised me sex today. There were conditions. I had to buy her a new set of golf clubs. I had to pay for her to get her hair done. I did my part. She then snuck off to bed, very happy with her new golf clubs and hair. No sex. I really don't like this woman.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,034 I hate Zillow. Not everyone knows that they have weird algorithms that don't actually reflect the value of a home.  But buyers these days, they go by what they see online.


The house next door foreclosed.  In swooped a flipper, who really did it up.  They took a really basic 1100sf rancher and redid it top to bottom.  New everything, including the roof.  They added a bedroom and a bathroom.  It was listed for a ridiculous price, nearly 300K.  It sold for 50K under asking price.  They still paid too much, but what do they know?

Before this, Zillow estimated my house at 210K.  That's about right, a little low, but in the ballpark.  Now, it's estimated at 142K.  I looked up my neighbors' houses.  They're all estimated well below market price.  All because of this ridiculous flip.  I'm so angry.



likes: 1
comments: 5

204,032 I work in a male dominated job (great guys, kind, funny, silly, etc.)- fast forward. We have a sexual harassment “meeting” for the company (I work for a very famous well known establishment (which I will not name, obviously) and boom! These guys will no longer go to lunch, hang out or joke around with me and the other women- I have worked there and known these guys for over 13 years! They are scared of being sued for sexual harassment (they were never disrespectful- ever!). I hope all you PC people drop dead! You can all fuck right off! No one can say anything nice to anyone anymore without a ruckus. YOU lot are the problem not the solution!


likes: 2
comments: 6

204,031 I can't believe my boyfriend likes me and finds me attractive. I love myself a lot, and I think I'm very attractive. I just have a hard time believing anyone else does. I guess it's possible. A lot of people DO have a crush on me. I feel like once they find someone hotter, they will stop liking me. He adores me. He treats me great for the most part. I love him more than anything, and NOBODY could make me stop loving him. I have that fear that he doesn't like me anymore. It's not a self esteem problem. I like myself. But I want other people to like me, too. Especially him. I've seen the girls he follows on Instagram and un-followed him immediately. I'm so insecure that I don't even follow my own boyfriend on instagram. He wasn't liking or commenting on their photos or anything. But he follows them, and that's enough to send me into a frenzy. UGHHH


likes: 0
comments: 1

204,030 As the race progresses, I look forward to hearing all the juicy details of Kamala's sexcapades.


likes: 2
comments: 6
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204,029 I thought I was pregnant a few weeks ago. My boyfriend and i have been making abortion jokes ever since. He said he would make me shake so hard it would makes scrambled eggs. I cracked up so hard. I'm having my period now but that was really funny :) And you know what? If that hypothetical baby was REALLY part of God's plan, it would survive the abortion. So there.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,028 Actually, I DO want to spend time with my father. It's just that I can't make plans with him because if i say I'm busy a certain day, he'll say he's going to commit suicide because I'm spending time with people other than him. Should i just not have anyone else in my life, no friends or family members besides him just so he will be happy?? He's my dad. I want to have a good relationship with him more than anything. It breaks my heart that I can't. I have to hide EVERYTHING in my life from him. He doesn't know I have a boyfriend. I can't tell him my work schedule. He doesn't even know I have a driver's license and I'm 29. He got mad at me for switching pharmacies without him knowing. Sometimes I go to the gym in the morning before work, and sometimes I go after work. Sometimes I go to my boyfriend's gym. He is mad that he doesn't know my gym schedule. He asks me when the last time I talked to my mother was, and I lie and say "i don't know" even it was yesterday. He gets so mad that I like her more. He wants to know the names of my coworkers. I give him fake names.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,027 Wait, Nike sneakers are being pulled from store shelves because they show an image of a Betsy Ross flag? An image of the original American flag is evil? Since when? How retarded.


likes: 2
comments: 4
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204,026 My son's good friend is transgender. He is a he but he was a she. If that makes sense. It's all weird to me. She wants attention and she gets it. Of course I get yelled at because I still refer to her as a she. When it comes to transgenderism, they are so quick to blame the normal white male for something.


likes: 3
comments: 5

204,025 You showed me how to love and for nothing but that, I am forever grateful. _/\_


likes: 4
comments: 0

204,024 When I signed up for my first checking account, I diligently balanced it in the first week. But never again. It's been 30 years.


likes: 7
comments: 6

204,023 When I make love to my wife, I rub her shoulders a bit. I kiss her neck. I run my finger over her lips. I stretch out her arms. I caress her fingers, her palms, her wrists, and so on. When I get back to the center, I gently unbutton her shirt. It takes another 15 minutes, but I eventually make my way down to her private zone and coax off her bottoms for the real part of the journey to begin. I am slow and sweet. I make her feel comfortable and loved.

When she makes love to me, she grabs my cock and thrusts it furiously, like she is trying to kill a snake by rigorously shaking it to death. I often have to reach out and hold her wrist, to slow her down and stop her from hurting me. She gets mad and says, "Fine, do it yourself." Then she gets up and walks away.

If only I married a woman who understood how to make love....




likes: 3
comments: 5

204,022 I keep going to these mom club events hoping to meet just one person that will help me escape the abuse. I have no friends and I need help if I’m ever going to survive this and get out w/my three kids.

Please smile at me. Please invite me to your kids birthdays. I need to know if I’m around friends that will help me. Don’t exclude me - I need someone to turn to. Please help.

I am so sad. This is my last place to reach out. He’s started hitting me. It’s going beyond emotional abuse. How did I let this happen?


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,021 I’m a 35-year old woman.

Things my family does not ask me about:
1. My awesome, fun career I’ve been at for 13 years.
2. My now-beautiful (formerly terrifying) house I purchased in my late 20s that I am always improving and working on.
3. My wonderful, kind, interesting, wise circle of friends.
4. My travels.
5. My darling, sweet, quiet companion pups.
6. My now-a-rental property I purchased when I was 22.
7. My student loans, which I paid off last year. Actually, my entire college experience, which I financed myself after being forced to move out at 17.
8. How I did all of this with zero support.

Things they ask me about:
1. Don’t you want to get married?
2. Can I live with you?
3. How did you get so lucky?


likes: 9
comments: 6

204,020 I'm a  professional musician. Get this. I paid for a Sean Paul mp3.  Eeeew. Shhhhh!


likes: 0
comments: 4

204,019 Oh Gawd, trying to watch Game of Thrones with my wife is like trying to teach a kindergarten student quantum theory. My wife can't focus enough to understand who anyone is.

After six seasons she's like, "Wait, who are the Starks again?"


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,018 I don't understand why people have open relationships. I find them way too complicated. They seem to be about control in different senses. Controlling one another. Controlling jealousy. Controlling feelings. Controlling commitment. Too much work that partners seem to want to avoid. I prefer to love one person and give everything I can to make one relationship work.



likes: 4
comments: 5

204,017 I confessed a guy I kissed that I didn't have sex since 2015. (not because I didn't have opportunities, not because I don't like sex. The truth is I am looking for love. I am demisexual. I can only have sex when I love someone me. So I am very careful choosing a partner. I don't usually flirt with men. I am quite atractive. Guys are always approaching me.). So, we had long conversations via whatsapp for a couple of weeks. Really good conversations. I thought we were going somewhere until, by coincidence, I saw him in a bar with a girl.So, I asked him directly why he didn't tell me he had a girlfriend. He replied: "she is not my girlfriend. She is my ex.girlfriend and we have an open relationship". Then, he invited me to join them with a drink. I accepted because I wanted to ask the girl if what he was saying was true. She seemed confused in the beginning but then she accepted they have an open relationship. The thing is: What did he expect from me? Clearly, I was not going to have sex with him until I knew who he was, and what he wanted with me. Is it possible that he might have been developing feelings for me, as I was for him?


likes: 0
comments: 6

204,016 I invited four people over for dinner. I made seafood risotto. No one came. They all forgot.

:(


likes: 2
comments: 8

204,015 Adding my own daughter story.

My boss was throwing a surprise birthday party for his wife. He invited about 30 people including me and my wife. The party was on the Saturday, but on the Friday he asked if I could bring the present he had for his wife. It was all wrapped and ready to go. He couldn't bring it into the restaurant or she'd know there was a party. I told him no problem.

That night I brought the present home and teased my wife, saying I must have a mistress. LOL. But then I explained it was for the boss's wife.

The following evening my wife and I get all dressed up. We were about to get in the car. I go to get the boss's present off the dining room table where I left it.

But it's not there. My wife and I look all around. No present. WTF?

On a hunch my wife calls my daughter. Did she see the present? I can hear my wife yelling into the phone "Get yourself home immediately!" My daughter had gone out with friends. Fifteen minutes later she pulls into the driveway wearing a beautiful dress.

You guessed it. During the day my daughter saw the present on the table. I still don't understand what she was thinking. She opened it. Saw it was a beautiful dress. She cut the tags off, put the dress on and went out with her friends.

My wife and I were too angry for words.

Thank the Lord for my wife. She worked her magic. She got the dress back in the original box and rewrapped it.  The tags were cut but she put them in the box as if the store already took them off for convenience.

The really messed up part was we didn't make it to the surprise party on time. We came in after the boss and his wife had already shown up. The boss didn't look pleased.

I don't understand what goes through a teenager's mind. She alternated beween saying she thought it was a present for her. And she thought it was a present for my wife and she thought it was okay to borrow it.

It left me so disappointed in who I had raised.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,014 I have been to numerous graduations and graduation parties in the last couple of weeks -  high school and college.  My question is this:  Dads....how can you let your daughters dress in these “baby-doll” dresses that show your daughter’s private parts at every move? Top that off with these same dresses are so low-cut that their tits are literally hanging out.  And you post that tit hanging out pic on social media saying, “ We are so proud!”!

Mom of girls and boys...


likes: 1
comments: 5

204,013 My daughter eats so much and she has a couple mild food insensitivities.  My secret is I dread taking her anywhere.  When I take her to a party she will tell the hostess all the things she cannot eat.  The hostess then looks at me like WTF.  Then for the things she can eat she will take heaping portions of those and when we say you have to take in to consideration there are other people here she fires back,
“Well I can’t eat half the things here so they should not eat this.  It should be all mine.”    She does not filter her comments either.  Needless to say we stopped taking her places....


likes: 1
comments: 7

204,012 I bleed when I poop.


likes: 0
comments: 8

204,011 I think the England women's soccer team threw the game. The girl goes to kick the ball and her foot passes right over the top. A few minutes later a girl tries the throw the ball but drops it. They scored a goal, but while offsides. Something smells funny.


likes: 0
comments: 3

204,010 I've started to look for a new place to live. I am leaving my perpetually mean wife.


likes: 2
comments: 4
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204,009 I had a conversation with my wife the other evening. She demanded I move her car in the garage.

I said it looks like a nice night, no need to put her car inside.

She insisted it was going to rain.

I looked up at the sky and pointed out the stars, no clouds at all.

She said they were not stars. She said they are satellites.

Satellites? Wouldn't the clouds be below the satellites?

No, she said, these are low satellites, the rain clouds are above them.

I can't live with this kind of stupidity anymore.


likes: 1
comments: 0

204,008 It's sad how fucking fat your teenage daughter is. It's one thing if you want to be 300 pounds. But why let your daughter get that way. You are a lazy dumb parent. Do you put in any effort to feed your family healthy meals? Damn, what you serving them? Fried butter for breakfast? Your kids should be taken away from you.


likes: 3
comments: 0

204,007 She got drunk on Saturday, and still said how much she loves me!  That's a pretty great Sign.  Then, the next morning, even though she was nauseous, she changed in front of me......White Panties, so fucking hot.  I got hard, I had to impale her, split her in half.  We were visiting friends, and the door was slightly open.
I took off the panties, licked her pussy, and she mounted me.

Even if it was 2 minutes, it was one of the hottest moments.  I love what she does to my body!


likes: 2
comments: 0

204,006 I was watching some hidden camera footage of a woman trying on clothes in a department store changing room. Even more fascinating that seeing her naked boobies, was watching her face. She'd try on a shirt, and then make like she was at a party talking to people. She'd smile and pretend to talk and nod her head and act like she was holding a drink. It was so cringeworthy to see her do this in what she thought was a private changing room. My god is this what all women do? They put on clothes and then practice their gestures to see how they look. I'm quickly losing respect for women.


likes: 1
comments: 13
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204,005 I always finish what I start. This is a great attribute to have in the working world. I'm a tremendous employee. But this will turn out to be a terrible attribute when it comes to you and the way you treat people.


likes: 1
comments: 2

204,004 If I had to walk to the end of the earth for him, I would have.
I’d crawl for you.
We could have been together. We could have had our child.
He would have been a boy. His name could have been Vincent, or David. I would have named him after you.
There could have been nights on the beach, soft, warm breezes that swept my long hair into your space and tickled your nose.
There could have been a road trip in which David called for you to give him more French fries. We would have laughed and commented on how tiny and beautiful his little hands are.
It could have been you.
It should have been you.
Is it too late?
I wish my life had a reset button. But it doesn’t. So I live in my mind, & hold back on telling you how I really feel.


likes: 0
comments: 0

204,003 I closed my eyes last night and woke up 12 hours later. I've never slept like that before. I didn't wake up once in the night. I think something medical is going on with me.


likes: 0
comments: 5

204,002 AOC lied. She shamelessly lied to further her agenda. She said illegal immigrants were forced to drink toilet water by Customs Officials. A total fabrication. She should be impeached.  More correctly she should resign in disgrace for lying to America, but she's not moral enough to take that route. So she needs to be impeached.


likes: 3
comments: 1
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204,001 He's handsome. He's funny. He's smart. He's talented. Let's not even start with his hot lovin' skills. The problem? He's a homophobe. Big time. He won't stop about how they "choose" to be that way and how they are flawed and sick, etc. etc. I have friends and family that are gay. So I think he needs to go.


likes: 2
comments: 12

204,000 My favorite part of sex is pulling out and seeing my cum ooze out of her. Once, when a big blob formed on her pussy, I dunked my head in there and licked it up. In looking back a guy's not suppose to lick up his own cum. I'm not sure why I did it. I think she didn't understand either. I feel kind of weird about the whole thing.


likes: 2
comments: 8

203,999 My husband cheated on me.
I have been a great wife. I have no shame or guilt in anything I have done while married.
I am sad though, because one of my husband’s friends I was always drawn to. I liked him, a lot, he was tall,  handsome, and broody and I always felt a connection there. He was a good friend though. Nothing ever happened. I was a good wife, so I never let on that I was really attracted to him.
When we moved away, I was at his house one morning. He asked me if he could hug me goodbye. He held me a very long time. I savored every moment of that hug. I was with a man who ignored me, wouldn’t sleep with me, berated me, gaslighted me, and made me feel horrible about myself.
I was like family to this friend, his daughter and his mother. I would come over and bake with his mom. I took care of his daughter a few times when he would have to work, and we would occasionally meet up for lunch with our kids because they were friends. I liked him, a lot!
My regret is that I didn’t leave my husband then.
That I didn’t dig deeper then and find out about his infidelity then.
This man is now married, to a great woman. Our time has passed, and I cannot tell him now the feelings I had for him.
I feel my husband has robbed me of many wonderful things.


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,997 This is unbelievable to me. My wife finally received a job offer. She has been looking for four years. At least she said she was looking. I've suspected she didn't want to work. We need her to. But she loves her life of leisure. But get this, she received the job offer as an administrative assistant in an office. Pretty good pay. But she tells me she turned it down. She said they wanted her to work 40 hours a week. This was too much for her. We have a child in college. The child does not need my wife to much lunch anymore. This was the perfect way for my wife to get back into the work force and start to pitch in financially. I can't believe she turned down the job. This is grounds for divorce. Hopefully the courts will see her laziness and force her to get a job after the divorce. I can't believe this is happening. Four years I've been trying to find her a job and she turns it down. Amazingly selfish person.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,996 A shy girl went to her prom. Some asshole student dumped a jug of juice on the shy girl's head. This is completely unacceptable. It makes me so mad. I'll say it. I think the offender should be killed. Go ahead, arrest me for saying saying so. But I would have no problem if some vigilante tracked down the offender and killed the person. Hopefully in a very painful way. I am so damned tired of bullies ruining life for others!!!!!!


likes: 1
comments: 5

203,995 Here's one of those silly online surveys making the rounds. It asks how many of these things have you NOT done. Average answers in my friends group seems to be about 7.

My number is 23 out of 26. Like what? I never realized I was so boring and lame compared to others. What's your number?

Gotten a ticket
Gone scuba diving
Eaten sushi
Been on a train
Gone ziplining
Been camping
Eaten food that fell on the floor
Gone skinny dipping
Travel out of the country
Been in an ambulance
Met someone famous
Been on TV
Been on a cruise
Gotten anything pierced
Broken a bone
Skipped school
Fired a gun
Been skydiving
Ridden in a limo
Had braces
Gotten a massage
Been swimming in the ocean
Dyed my hair
Watched Star Wars
Ridden a horse
Sung karaoke


likes: 0
comments: 13

203,994 She posts how she is hot in her apartment and is looking to install an air conditioner. She wants recommendations blah blah blah.

I look at her home page. It's filled with posts about how we have to stop global warming.

Hahaha. What a fucking hypocrite.



likes: 0
comments: 3

203,993 I know this guy. He was in with the wrong crowd. At 20 he was in a motel room doing a drug transaction. He got shot and killed.

He had the same name as his father. He didn't really know his father. The mother and father split up just after the boy was born. They lived 1,000 miles apart in different cities. The mother though, when her son as killed, she thought it right to call the father and let him know his son was dead, in case he wanted to make the trip to attend the funeral. So she calls and gets told that the father was just shot dead. He died the same day and the same hour as his son with the same name.

Now that is weird. I think there is more to life and death than we know. There are mysteries which are hard to explain. Someone is pulling the strings.


likes: 4
comments: 6

203,991 I dislike my friends boyfriend. He’s the most kind person I’ve ever met but sometimes he can just be an idiot and a slob. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t like sex. He’s also oblivious to when her and I mess around with each other. At least she’s satisfied every time.

27/F


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,990 Have you ever pooped or seen poop come out during anal sex?


likes: 0
comments: 7

203,989 I know a couple that are in the most toxic relationship you can imagine- always arguing, fighting, etc. but get this they video tape each other on their cell phones and “group” forward it to all of us. This makes me feel unfortable & weird. Why, do we, as their friends need to see this? I have taken them both aside and told them to end this hideous mess. They have a small child for God’s sake!


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,988 Nothing more satisfying than seeing that those that bullied you every day of your school life once upon a time.......are now looking like they lived every day twice. And uglier than a bucket of assholes, to boot!  PSA: being so hateful ages you. It will catch up with you sooner than you think. Hey, I don't say what I think out loud. Or associate with any of them. I chose to be nice! Sooo....no wrinkles.


likes: 2
comments: 2

203,987 My wife makes about $10,000 a year in a part time job. She spends about $50,000 a year on frivolous things for herself. Yet when asked, she'll tell people she' a self sufficient woman who makes her own money and pays her own way.

I have nothing against a self sufficient woman, but don't lie about it. Don't tell people you are something you are not. She pays $10,000 towards her expenses. I pay $40,000. Plus I then pay for all the normal household expenses. I just shake my head.  Yea right, she's self sufficient.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,986 When I come home from work and see the bottle of Bio-Oil on the bedside table, I know she masturbated today.


likes: 1
comments: 7

203,985 I had a dream that I was in a library, and I falsely accused the librarian of rape. How does my brain come up with this stuff????


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,984 47-year old man here.  When I was younger I was always told by women that I was “cute” or “handsome” or “gorgeous” or “hot.”  It was a blessing and a curse.  I’d be auto-rejected by women who thought I was trying to get into their pants, but I could get away with flirting in ways that would get other men slapped.  As luck would have it I started to gain a lot of weight in my early 30s due to an undiagnosed autoimmune disease.  As I gained weight I began to notice that women weren’t paying attention to me anymore.  I was finally diagnosed a few months ago.  I had to change my diet to account for the autoimmune issue.  Now the weight is coming off and the bloating is going away.  I’m seeing women looking at me again.  I looked in the mirror and couldn’t believe how attractive I was becoming, especially since my hair is graying and my eyes have been getting lighter.  

And why is any of this important?  Well, this morning I grabbed my wife’s ass to see if she’d even smile.  She told me I was being gross.  She doesn’t touch me anymore.  I’m now thinking about using my reclaimed looks to fucknevery 20-year old I can find.


likes: 3
comments: 6

203,983 Some girls look better without makeup. The only reason this is a secret is because if i say it out loud some feminist will start yelling at me. Some makeup makes people's faces look hella dry, and other kinds give you acne. Contour only looks good on certain face shapes. If your nose is big, and you contour it to look smaller, it isn't going to look good 90% of the time, because you did it wrong. Most girls pick the wrong colors for foundation. Ever been to saphora? It's so dark in there. It's no wonder they buy the wrong color. My face is a few different shades, and it looks weird when I even it out with one color. My freckles and my uneven tan are 1000 times cuter than any foundation. Most lipstick doesn't flatter the person's skin color at all, and people overdo it on the eye shadow and they look like a prostitute. If I take a selfie while wearing foundation, it just looks like my nose blends right into my face. Like, I don't even have a nose unless you look closely. It's just weird!


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,982 Wimbeldon is on.  I'll always think of a few years ago, sitting it the chair , getting hair transplants, while watching Wimbeldon on the TV.
Shaving the back of my head, cultivating the hairs, cutting tiny slits at my hairline, and inserting them.  


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,981 I'm not sure what to make of this. I was snooping around in my wife's browser history. I did so because she seemed a little distant. I know her. I thought something is up. In the past week she has been shopping online for sexy looking underwear. She has also purchased two bikinis. This is so out of character for my wife. I mean maybe it's a good thing. Maybe she is trying to get sexy for me. But she hasn't shown any leaning in that way for years. But the weirdest part, she also searched for how to delete browsing history on her iphone. Why is she trying to delete her browsing history? Unfortunately for her, her computer and phone are connected. Even is she accesses websites on her phone and then deletes the history, that same history is still available to me on her computer. I'm waiting to see what happens next. But my radar is definitely pinging.


likes: 0
comments: 14

203,980 I don't like one of my grown children. The others are good fun and interesting but this one person has a difficult personality. I hate to admit it but I'm secretly pleased when this one child of mine can't come to a family gathering.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,979 I wish I could listen to podcasts while he fucked me. Then I wouldn't feel like I wasted so much time. I suppose it would be inappropriate though. Darn.


likes: 2
comments: 2

203,978 It's the strangest thing. My wife has gotten it into her head that I have done something terribly wrong. She's acting haughty and cool towards me deciding if I should be forgiven. I asked, "Forgiven for what?" I pointed out that a few months ago she was anxious about other things in her life and took it out on me. Her tirade lasted for many week. She said and did awful things towards me. I saw the anger. I understood the reason had nothing to do with me. So I didn't fight back with her. I let it play itself out, which it eventually did. Yet in some self protective way she now thinks it was me who freaked out and I am in need of her forgiveness. Humans are strange.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,977 If I looked like Rosie O'Donnell, I'd be angry all the time too.


likes: 5
comments: 1
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203,976 There’s these Greek restaurant that I frequent often sometimes I order food and wait in my car for it . There’s also a “massage” place next door , sometimes I seen guys come out of there with huge smiles in their faces , I know they are getting more than a massage in there . One time these guy was coming out he had a disguise, he was wearing a very fake looking wig with sunglasses and park his car a cross the street ,he was very tall like seriously dude you think people are not going to recognize you going there . Men are stupid , I’m sure he is the kind of guy the goes to church and judge other people, I have met plenty of hypocrites like him , conservative, republican who can’t stand gay people and talk shit about liberals and atheists but they have no problems cheating on their fat wife’s with hookers .


likes: 1
comments: 11
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203,975 I keep a journal on Microsoft Word. It's mostly about why I'm going to kill myself. I document various methods. I've done good research. I have also composed a draft of my suicide note. It's all in this one Word document.

I have to laugh though. Whenever I open the document a window pops up saying, "Welcome back!". Yes, thanks Microsoft for being so gleeful about my passing.


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,974 My life is so sad that watching a couple of pigeons fucking is the highlight of my day.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,973 You're not ugly, you're just sick of looking at your own face. Think about it. You've had the same face since as long as you've been alive. When you look in the mirror, the same face appears every time. Of course you're not gonna like it sometimes. It's not because you're actually ugly. You're just sick of looking at your own face for all these years. LOL


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,972 To piss off my haters and negative people who told me it was impossible to get your body back once you hit certain age . I’m going to post a picture of my self in booty shorts with a sport bra so you can see my fabulous abs complete with my very tone tight legs . Mark my words in 6 months the picture it’s going up in these website to show silly women the difference between silly diets and actually work , diets are great to lose weight sure you’ll look great in clothes but if you want to look great naked you have to work very hard for it.


likes: 5
comments: 2

203,971 Today I’m feeling sad. Today I’m feeling empty…
I’m not sure how to describe it but I’ve been feeling this way for at least the past week. Its easy to pretend I’m ok because I’m either at work or sleeping. Gosh I’m sleeping so much now, sometimes 10 hours in one go. It’s nice. Being in bed, alone, is my favorite most comfortable place right now. I can dissolve into a nothingness that is comforting. I just close my eyes, snuggle under the covers and welcome nothingness. It doesn’t take long to go under but it’s usually the best feeling. I don’t even wake up feeling refreshed…it’s more of gradual consciousness coming back. Once its there, takes a while to actually leave the bed. I never want to voluntarily leave that comfort. And when I finally do leave…I long to be back there. Alone with my nothingness.



likes: 3
comments: 1

203,970 I was sitting on the front steps. A guy drives up and hands me a package from Amazon. He starts to get back in his car. I call to him and tell him he's at the wrong address. My house number is 20. The package is for 29. He shrugs and drives off.

I know my neighbor across the street. Of course I walked over and left the box on his porch.

But I see trouble in Amazon's future. Not everyone will be like me.



likes: 1
comments: 0

203,969 My name is haroon shazad!


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,968 The best revenge it’s when you find out your online bully looks like Miss Piggy , it’s comical I mean you can wear 5 pounds of make up , cute tops to match your jeans and dye your hair blonde but you still huge , I don’t even want to picture you naked probably saggy boobs with a pouch and the irony your husband it’s super thin ( borderline anorexic) it’s like miss piggy and Kermit the frog .


likes: 3
comments: 0

203,963 I love to whisper in her ear that she has a Sacred Pussy, guys want it but she only spreads her legs for me.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,961 My daughter tells me I'm a judgmental racist. I asked her what I've done to give her this impression. She points out I'm a rich white man. Therefore I'm a racist.

Oh. Talk about being judgmental....


likes: 3
comments: 6

203,960 My spouse booked a surprise trip to an all inclusive resort in the carribean next week. Shit - now I'll have to sleep with him.


likes: 2
comments: 10

203,959 I use Listerine instead of Scope because Listerine tastes so awful. Therefore it must be working.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,958 I hope the US women's team loses in the World Cup. Such arrogance!


likes: 5
comments: 8

203,957 I feel so lucky to have the next several days totally to myself.


likes: 3
comments: 3

203,956 I want my to have a party with just girls. Then I want my boyfriend to stop by. I want to spin while they all play naked twister. I, in a jealous rage will not show my feelings. I'll just get angrier and angrier, but also hornier and hornier by the minute. Then when I can't take it anymore I will kick everyone out and fuck the shit out of him. Or maybe have a pool party and not go in the pool, and watch my boyfriend swim around with all of them. Or maybe go on vacation somewhere, and go to the hotel pool, bar or casino, start a conversation with a bunch of hot barely dressed women, and find an excuse to leave, kiss him on the cheek and then go away for a few hours. And then he comes home to me at the end of the night and we make sweet love. I'm a psycho who likes to hurt my own feelings and gets very turned on by it.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,955 Even at the beach you go in workout clothes. I bet you ran there and ran home.

I think you’re addicted to working out.

I guess there are worse things to become addicted to.


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,954 I know my friends love me cuz none of the drug dealers in my city will sell to me.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,952 My mother always told me to never depend on a man for anything - get a college degree in something you enjoy that will make a comfortable living, always have your own money, take care of your own bills.

What she really should have told me was to find a man who wouldn't depend on me.


likes: 9
comments: 4

203,951 I really don’t give a shit about pride or diversity. I am sick of hearing about it. Yes this is a secret before the secret gets flagged. I could never tell anybody about this.


likes: 14
flagged

203,950 I loathe my grandfather. Racist old sexist who horribly abused my mother and grandmother and inflicted massive amounts of trauma on both of them. He is completely without conscience or remorse. He’s too old now to beat women so now that he’s living with my parents because he’s too old to care for himself he treats my mom like a servant and I’m getting real sick and fucking tired of it. I’ll be glad when he has to move to a nursing home. I tried bonding with him but all I am to him is another inferior woman who is beneath him. It used to hurt me, but now I’ve just stopped trying. It doesn’t matter what I’ve achieved in my life, he insults me by telling me I should just go find a rich man to marry because that’s what women should do. I’d never wish death on anyone but I’m sick and fucking tired of him and forcing myself to be nice to him. I’m angry and bitter that he’s still here making people miserable and my sweet grandmother who loved and valued me died young. I hate him.


likes: 1
comments: 6

203,949 It’s funny when people made assumptions , when you see me you think I’m these very shy , award , aloof at times which sometimes I’m but what they don’t know it’s how wild I used to be before I got married and settled down . I used to be very good friends with a couple who owned an adult website businesses these it’s before free porn , the wife used to be a professional photographer contractor, she did many shootings for all kind of adult magazines including playboy and hustler. Sometimes I used to help her with her sister to set up photo shoots , I met so many porn starts, playmates , exoticism’s dancers etc... I even become close friends with some of them in fact two of them appear in a reality tv show , remember the tacky show where girls were competing for the “love” of the wash up 80’s band singer in VH1 ? Well I was very close friends with one of the contestants and knew personally the winner . I also met Jenna Jameson back in the day when she was hot . I even ask my photographer friend to make some semi nude pictures for me , which I gifted to a guy I used to date as a birthday present .  So next time you see the “boring “ , shy , quite girl just remember what they say about judging a book by its cover.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,948 My wife’s ex got the better part of the deal.


likes: 3
comments: 1

203,947 My wife blocked me from seeing where she is using the find-my-iphone app. Very suspicious. In response, I've started hiding my phone in her car. I turned the ringer off so she won't hear it. So far she's gone no place weird, but it's only been a few days. The big test will come Monday when I go off to work and she's left to her own devices all day. This is better than my old way of stalking her. In the past she knew I was watching. I'm sure this made her very cautious. I think there were times she left her phone home on purpose while she went out. But now she thinks she's completely invisible. If she is having an affair she will think she is in the free and clear to meet up with him.


likes: 2
comments: 6

203,946 If the next James Bond is black, I'm not seeing the movie. You don't muck with some things. What comes after that - a transgender James Bond? Take your PC crap and shove it up your ass.


likes: 7
comments: 12
flagged

203,945 My high school daughter had a friend over for dinner. We then started to watch a movie. At 9 pm sharp the alarm rings on her phone. She tells us it's her birth control reminder. She takes her pill at exactly 9 pm every night. She then got a pill form her purse and swallowed. Like when did young girls taking birth control become so main stream that they feel it's okay to announce it to a room of people they hardly know?


likes: 2
comments: 9

203,944 I read an article saying Britain just experience its hottest day of the year. The article goes on to say this lends credibility to the notion that global warming is real.

Say what? Doesn't every year have a hottest day? Whether global warming exists, or doesn't exist, no matter what, one day every year will be the hottest day.

How idiotic.



likes: 2
comments: 2

203,943 I am not really religious or a believer in the supernatural, but this made me think a little. I have a very small family which is passing year by year. This time it was my uncle (father’s brother) not to long ago. On the board in his room was the name of the nurse and PA. They were the names of my dad and my grandmother (both deceased). They are relatively common names, but I think of the chances they had the same names and both assigned to him the day he died. Certainly they were not the only nurse or PA on duty at a very large hospital. Makes you think if it was just a very low probability coincidence or there is more to this life after death and they helped guide him into the afterworld.


likes: 3
comments: 3

203,942 Finally got a new phone after 6 years, had a hard time transferring everything from the old to new but finally got it to work.
Got a message that I was almost out if storage this am, wtf? New phone has a much bigger memory.  After poking around I find that all the pictures I thought I had deleted off my old phone were actually up in the cloud and downloaded with the contacts, apps etc.
Thanks apple


likes: 2
comments: 2

203,941 I'm gonna try to make this short but it does take a little bit of background so bear with me.

10 years ago, I moved across the country (from the East coast to the Southwest). A few months later, this former client of mine (a woman, like me) emails me to ask how I'm doing. I answer and we keep exchanging benign emails for a few weeks. Eventually, she mentions she's never been out West and could she come visit? I say yes, of course and a few more weeks later, she pops up for a week-long visit. It goes well, she flies home and continues to email. A few months after that, she asks if she can visit again. I say okay. She comes out for another week. It goes well, then she flies home.

A few weeks after THAT, she emails me to let me know she has decided to relocate and asks if I would consider a roommate while she looks for her own place. I chew that over then agree bc I myself moved not that long ago and $ is tight.

She lands and then...never moves out. For 4 years, we ended up being roommates. It was alright until the moment when I finally realized her endgame. She had a crush on me and was hoping we would eventually be a couple.
There was a very unpleasant conversation (for her, not me) when I had to explain in no uncertain terms that she was a friend and that's all she would ever be - I am straight btw. After that, our relationship seemed to find its cruising speed and we settled into a nice friendship. Over the years, we've gone on many trips together and have done many things, such as participate in athletic events and go to concerts.

6 years into this story, I bought a house and chose not to have a roommate anymore. So she found another room-sharing arrangement and eventually bought her own house 2 years after I bought mine. On the same street I live in.

Throughout all this, I've had other friends tell me how weird this all was but I mostly chalked it off to this woman being very emotionally stunted (home-schooled in FL and TN, parents are Religious nuts, she is 35 and in the closet and still a virgin) and in need of support and mentoring.

Well.

Well. Well.

Well. Well. Well.

Cue a month ago.
Out of nowhere, she tells me she is about to have her own roommate, a younger gay woman she met online and who is relocating to our town, from a different state.
The new roommate eventually moved in 3 weeks ago, and she is this petite brunette, very pretty and vivacious. Save for my having a few inches and pounds on her, we look very much alike.

So, after almost 10 years of friendship, travel (domestic and international), adventures and all-over mischievousness, I am barely given the time of day anymore. They are going on trips, they are going to events, they are going out to eat, they are going to live music concerts etc etc etc. Am I asked if I want to go? Nope. Not once in 3 weeks. The only thing I am still good for is to dog sit for my former friend.

I confronted my former friend and asked if they two are now dating (I know they are not because the new woman told me in no uncertain terms that she would be hard pressed to find anyone to be attracted to in our town/state) and she sheepishly said, no.

I said nothing to her answer. Not because I don't want to, but because I am not sure I can be measured enough. I am quite simply seething. To know that these past 10 years mean nothing at all, and that she was Single-White-Female-ing me is infuriating.

So I sit back and watch my former friend (she lives 3 doors away after all) do with this new woman what she did with me: insert herself in her life and morph herself to fit her new mark's lifestyle. I road cycle and take part in Grand Fondo races (100+ miles) and so did she; the new woman is an ultra runner and all of a sudden, the two of them are traveling to the Mid-West to take part in a marathon in the next few weeks....

It's disturbing and upsetting to know that I invested so much of my energy in a relationship that was not what I thought it was. I have a history of attracting perturbed individuals but this takes the cake...




likes: 1
comments: 6

203,940 I'm thinking about starting random rumors about whoever becomes the Democratic front runner candidate. Yea, candidate X sexually assaulted women. I know it's true. I was at a party at Yale and I witnessed him fucking women. I went to a house once, I don't remember where or when, but I saw him push women down on the bed and molest them. There was another time I squeezed past him and he raped me on the sidewalk. I spoke to a porn actress who said he filmed sex scenes with her. Sometimes he colluded with Russia to molest women. I also saw him urinating on women in a Russian hotel room. All true. Trust me.

Oh wait, never mind, no one would ever believe stories like this....


likes: 4
comments: 0
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203,939 I'm visiting friends. I jerked off in their shower this morning. I couldn't risk jerking off in the guest room, maybe they could hear me, so shower it was. I splunked and it hit the shampoo bottles in the corner of the tub.  From the look of it it's their teenage daughter's shampoo. I rinsed the bottles off. But sorry about that.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,938 I’m bored, so like do you wanna fuck?


likes: 2
comments: 3

203,937 This is so odd , a few weeks ago I was sitting getting my hair done and overheard these conversation a guy was having next to me. I usually mind my own business but his voice sounded familiar, he was talking about being in town visiting his older daughter . So today out of curiosity I google his daughter name and surprise she does lives here , so now I’m certain it was him . I had a flint with him many years ago when I was barely an adult , he was a jerk though the only thing we had in common back then was just the both of us had a high sex drive , we used to do it multiple times a day but he was a cheater and had a huge ego , I’m glad I didn’t see him face to face because he probably would recognize me . Hopefully I won’t be bumping into him anytime soon when he is in town , he is a very unpleasant person .


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,936 I feel so guilty when I notice my plants are wilting. I drop everything to give them water.But let's face it, I'm a bad plant mom. I'm going to be a terrible real parent one day. My child will probably go days without food.


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,935 Some ass is using my email account/address to sign me up for all sorts of sexually explicit websites.
Why?


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,934 My wife cheated on me. Instead of taking a step back and figuring out why she was so unhappy that she took such a drastic step I blamed the guy completely.  I let blaming him for ruining my marriage totally consume my life. I was miserable and made everyone around me miserable too.
Months of therapy helped me to figure out that while the guy was partially to blame, my wife and I both guilty too.
I spent most of my  time working long hours and then on the weekend golfing, fishing, playing poker and playing tennis. I was never there, justifying that I made a ton of money to support her that I was allowed to do my own things in my free time and she never ever communicated just how unhappy she was.
Lesson learned the extremely hard way.


likes: 5
comments: 8

203,933 I often wonder about women with kids that married a guy with no kids . Wouldn’t most guy find a woman who had kids not as attractive as women without, I mean your body changes as you have kids , your abs can get destroyed and no matter how much you work on them you still have a mommy pouch , not counting the boobs after nursing a few kids your boobs never go back to the same . I would afraid my husband would be checking out the younger women with tight bodies , free of stretch marks with perky boobs and no mommy pouch but maybe I’m wrong maybe not all guys are shallow and genuinely appreciate women regardless of what their bodies look like .


likes: 0
comments: 7

203,932 My mom is slowly disintegrating into a shadow of her former self, and it hurts me so much I just want to vomit and cry my eyes out.

I don’t know what to do.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,931 I had these blonde woman followed me before around the store while shopping, she would just stare at me . At first I was wondering if she was mistaking me for someone else but I just found out she is the wife of the guy where I used take my car for service , I dealt with her husband a few times who I found very friendly but he never did or say anything inappropriate, last week I notice her husband wasn’t there anymore and his old assistant gave me a dirty look as if I did something wrong . My guess it’s probably the guy had an affair with one of his young assistants or maybe was to flirty with the customers and somehow the wife found about it . Oh well I can understand feeling insecure and not trusting your spouse but it’s not cool to make assumptions and taking out on innocent people like myself who didn’t anything.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,930 I pray because I'm told to - not because I believe in it.


likes: 1
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203,929 I made blueberry muffins....... but forgot to put in the blueberries. This is what getting old is like.


likes: 3
comments: 5

203,928 I’m having sex with someone I could never see myself with in the future. I have definitely been on the other side of this coin, it feels weird being the one who doesn’t want a relationship. I’m the woman. I’m in my late thirties. I don’t feel attached even a little bit. The guilt is there.

I guess what I can be proud of is that I have been completely transparent with this guy.

The companionship is nice, but sometimes with him, I’m more lonely than if I were in my own company. It’s because it’s based on sex. Even the sex isn’t that great. It’s okay. He’s never gone down on a woman before and never has the desire to. Instant short term. Hard line.

I keep wanting to break it off, this would be the second time I would be breaking it off. Too bad it’s a small town, I could say I have some sort of STI or something to him. Just a clean break and make it easy.

But he gets so sad. It’s just sex, you’re not in love, trust me, you’re in lust. You don’t even know my middle name.

As I type this I feel like a total jerk.  He just offered so much comfort to me in a time of grief. But you know, in retrospect, he was a distraction at a time I was afraid to face the grief.

Now he’s like a growth that I’m ready to have removed.

Oh brother.




likes: 2
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203,927 She wanst to show me something on the other side of our yard. She starts walking over there and calls over her shoulder, "Come!"  Just like the way she summons our dog.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,926 I have no pity for first responders of 9/11 who are now dying. I lived a few blocks away when it happened. These workers were cautioned everyday to wear a breathing mask. But no, they were cool tough guys and didn't wear a mask. Now they are dying and it's their own fault.


likes: 2
comments: 5
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203,925 Has anyone ever used a rubber doll for sex? I'm not talking about the $5 blow up dolls. But there seem to be high quality heavy and realistic looking dolls. I'm wondering if they are a good fuck and are they worth the price tag.


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,924 My wife wants to see open houses today. She thinks we should move to a bigger place. I'm quietly thinking of divorcing her. She doesn't know. But it shows how far apart we are. She is oblivious to how she behaves. She hasn't had sex with me in a year and she thinks I want to buy her a bigger house? Not happening.


likes: 1
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203,923 The secret below where the poor guy is talking about getting married and his wife quits her job and wants $100k from him reminded me of something I saw this week...

I "follow" on Instagram this friend of a friend of mine.  She's a gorgeous Indian woman, maybe in her late 20s or very early 30s.  Big fake boobs and an amazing ass.  She and my friend (a divorced woman) usually post pictures of the two of them having drinks at local clubs.

Sometimes other pictures of the friend will pop up on my feed.  She has a ring on her hand.  She lives in this exclusive neighborhood in a huge fucking house.  She and her husband seem to be going on these expensive vacations once a month.  Her husband is a doctor, and holy shit he's an ugly Indian dude. He's as ugly as she's gorgeous.  It's definitely an odd couple in the looks department.

Last week another picture of her popped up on my feed.  The gorgeous young Indian woman with the fake boobs is showing off a huge ring on her hand.  She captions the picture with "I'm the luckiest girlfriend!!"

As I get older it's the little things that grab my attention.  She doesn't say, "I'm the luckiest fiance!", or something that implies her relationship with this man is permanent in some way and will last into the future.  She doesn't say, "Bob loves me so much!!", again implying there's an strong emotional bond between her and this man who's spending a shit ton of money on her and letting her live in his house.  She specifically uses a term that implies impermanence in the relationship: "girlfriend."

This is going to sound sexist, but I've noticed this with women who use guys as a means for gaining status in some way.  They rarely post pictures of them with the guy and refer to him by his name.  It's rarely "Me and Bob had a great time last night."  They refer to the guy by the position he holds in her life: "Me and the boyfriend had a great time last night."  They refer to the guy as an object and not a person.

I feel bad for the ugly Indian doctor dude.  I can't help but think she's only in the relationship for the financial aspect.  



likes: 1
comments: 5

203,922 I'm all alone this weekend, hoping you will reach out to get together.
Know it won't happen as I burned those bridges completely but it never hurts to be an optimist.


likes: 3
comments: 1

203,921 The other day I had the worst panic attack, I literally taught I was going to have a heart attack and died. All the sudden i felt these pressure all over my body and deep sadness came over me , it was difficult just trying to breathe .  I haven’t had an episode these bad on years but for the last year I been going through a lot stress over things I have no control whatsoever , to make things worse these month suck between my health problems and expenses coming out of nowhere hopefully things will get better.


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,920 I’m too scared to get help, because I’m too ashamed of the things that are wrong with me.


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203,917 I had a "friend" who often reached out for financial help over the years.  Sometimes she would pay me back and sometimes not. No big deal, she was a friend.
I am in a tough spot this weekend, I reached out to her to ask for some assistance, nope she is too busy to lend a hand to help.  Guess I learned my lesson the hard way



likes: 2
comments: 2

203,916 I'm at a concert right now. Almost everyone has their fucking phone up in front of their face taking pictures or videos of the show. Come on people. Be in the moment! Watch it LIVE. Not thru your phone screen!!! WTF!?!?!?


likes: 4
comments: 5

203,915 It took me 6 years to get my associates degree. It makes me feel embarrassed, but it’s not because I’m stupid. I just think people will probably assume I am, but...
They don’t matter anyway. I DID IT ANYWAY. :)


likes: 16
comments: 6

203,914 I live in Vegas, and there’s a huge convention right now(as always).

All the people for the convention are old. They’re the WORST customers to deal with. rude, no manners, don’t listen.

They’re just mad they won’t be around much longer. Sorry, Betty. Not my problem. Be a dick somewhere else


likes: 2
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203,913 I am extremely attracted to manly, alpha type men. f/29


likes: 4

203,911 I've been trying to turn the tables on my wife. She gets in a controlling mode sometimes where she won't have sex for months, but she will "innocently" get undressed in front of me while getting ready for bed or whatever. I think it's a manipulation on her part. She wants me to see her naked as a way of showing me what I'm missing. It's twisted.

So what I've been doing in the last few days is leaving the room whenever she's about to get undressed. I find a reason to go down stairs to get something. By the time I come back I've missed the show. I thought this might disarm her.

It might be working. Today she went to take a shower. I was in the bedroom. I knew she would be coming back in wearing only a towel. So I went downstairs. Interesting, instead of getting dressed in the bedroom like she always does,  she came down stairs naked saying she needed to get something from the laundry room. I think she's realizing her showy plans in the bedroom are being thwarted, so she's following me to the downstairs. It confirms this is a game she's playing.


likes: 4
comments: 10

203,909 I can tell the difference between old semen and new semen. Semen which has been holed up in his balls for a month comes out more yellow. New semen comes out pure white. When we are having sex for the first time in a while and his semen is pure white, I smile a little because I know he's been jerking off when I'm not around.


likes: 0
comments: 8

203,908 I was talked into getting a phone. Now that I have one my wife doesn't respond to my texts. So what was the point of this? Is there some kind of text etiquette where a person is supposed to respond in a certain amount of time? I mean they can't claim they didn't get it right?


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,907 Amazing. This is my fear coming true. Research released today shows that many of these drugs people take for the infinite amount of whiny medical complaints - they seem to help - at first - but it has now been shown they can cause a large increase in dementia cases. This is exactly why I avoid medicines. Drug companies don't know what the fuck they are doing. Or they are short sighted and come up with a drug to pass on to sick people today, but they don't do testing on what happens 20 years down the line. So congratulations you hypochondriacs who pop pills like candy. Nothing was really wrong with you in the first place, but now you will have dementia. Now you really do have something to worry about.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,906 Good day for staying in bed and fucking all day


likes: 7
comments: 0

203,905 They have a robot to vacuum the floors. It's a start. What I really need is a robot to fuck me.


likes: 2
comments: 5

203,904 I need to get laid. Like now. F24.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,903 I always make dumass comments to things on facebook when I'm drunk.


likes: 2
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203,902 Ok. Really, here is my secret: I date. I like women. I'm on a slight hiatus from dating. It's expensive and does take an emotional toll on me in some ways.
But truly, I wish- I LONG for someone that I can rant n rave to. I listen to my women friends' problems, but they never ask about me. Ever. Or if they do, I need them to ask FURTHER instead of just letting me off the hook with an, "I'm fine".
So there you go. Go ahead, internet. Cut away : /


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,901 In the past few days I've been googling divorce. Now my computer is being hit up with divorce ads. Oh great. What happens when he watches something on Youtube and sees the divorce ads? The internet is mind boggling in how invasive it has become. There ought to be a law against it. This could get someone killed.


likes: 3
comments: 3

203,899 When I was 16 me and two friends were offered summer jobs doing fiberglass work in the boat yard. At the last minute I received another job offer to work in the concession stand at the beach. I opted for the beach. By 20 years later both my fiberglassing friends were dead from lung cancer. There but for the grace of God go I.


likes: 6
comments: 6

203,898 Why would a 17 year old girl be meeting a stranger in a park at 3 AM? Lesson to all, don't do stupid things.


likes: 4
comments: 2

203,897 The bakery around the corner is more dangerous that the local drug pushers. His cream filled donuts are worth dying for.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,896 My anorexic daughter refuses to tell me her weight. She says she is over 18 and her weight is none of my business. I told her that if she is over 18 and she no longer has to answer to me, then she needs to start paying rent and paying for her own college tuition. She rolled her eyes ad walked away. Why are teens so damned obnoxious? I'm so sick of the attitude.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,895 It's been a terrific day, but now it's time for bed, and I plan to do a LOT of masturbating!  Looks like it'll be terrific NIGHT, too!


likes: 2
comments: 4

203,893 My health insurance premium is about $20 a month. Thank you Obamacare! But a few months ago someone entered a wrong yearly income into the system and suddenly my monthly bill went to $1500. It took two months for me to convince them there was an error. By that time they said I owed $3000. I had to call a bunch more times to get it cleared up. The error was from nothing I did. It was all on the government's administration side. They finally cleared it up. But only sort of. They issued a $3000 credit. But they did it twice. The first time wiped out the balance due. The second time gave me a $3000 credit. Woohoo! I'm half tempted to ask them to send me a check for my "over-payment" of $3000. Ha ha, that would be funny. Finally a mistake in my favor! BTW, as you can see, Obamacare is very messed up.  


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,892 One of my favorite parts of visiting people for the weekend is getting to use their shampoo. I get to sample all kinds of new flavors. This should be a product. Like a box containing 20 different kinds of interesting shampoos. It would make for a great Christmas present.


likes: 3
comments: 4

203,891 There are days my husband is home and I don't have to go to work for three more hours. I despise these days. I know he wants sex. I want anything but sex. I find a reason to go out food shopping or run to the post office. Anything so I am not in the house alone with him.


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,890 I gave my husband a blowjob last night.
Then another.
And another.
I let him cum in my mouth 3 times.
The first 2 orgasms didn’t taste like anything in particular but the third was sweet.
I can’t wait to do it again.


likes: 2
comments: 7

203,889 I spy on my wife. I follow her and watch from a distance. I've found myself in the bushes standing in dog poop. No matter the cost I need to know what she is doing without me. I see it though. I need psychological help. I make myself so sad with the behavior. I want to stop.


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,888 I’m sitting in a room. Happiness, fear, anxiety, pleasure, anger, longing and fulfillment are all in the room with me. They each take their turn. Nothing else to do but discuss and get along.     ¯\_(Ӡྤϱᎌ᭩


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,887 About a month after we got married my wife quit her job without warning. She never discussed it with me. She quit and came home and told me she needed the time to focus on this new phase of her life. Two months later she said she was out of money and she needed me to give her $100,000 for 'expenses'. Shortly thereafter she flew to Arizona for a week at a spa.

I should have left her back then. I ignored the warning signs in favor of getting the occasional handjob. I am probably the biggest fool on the planet.


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,886 My wife talks too much. In social situations I see people trying to get away from her. She misses these social cues.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,885 I think Iran wants to provoke a war because they have placed nuclear bombs in key US cities. They hope we attack over these silly drone strikes so they can justify nuking us. Goodbye everyone.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,884 Kamala seemed very nervous and shaky. I thought she might burst out in tears from the stress. Not presidential at all.


likes: 1
comments: 6
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203,883 My wife will wake me in the middle of the night and start yelling that my foot touched her foot. She has laid down the law on this. Our bodies can have no contact at all. Anything else would be sexual harassment.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,881 Everybody gets so outraged about homophobia, transphobia, islamophobia, racism, etc, but are OK with ageism. It's disgusting and hypocritical. F/29


likes: 10

203,880 A man who I know to be capable of violence spent months harassing and threatening me for sex. After months of going through this stress I decided it would be easier to just give in. Well that was clearly dumb because now he’s sexually blackmailing and extorting me. There’s nothing I can do. I guess I am just destined to be a victim of sexual violence. Might just kill myself


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,878 I miss Richard Swift


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,877 I miss Richard Swift


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,876
In an old job I had, a really cute female coworker who was a friend of mine texted me at 6 in the morning to let me know the office was closed due to snow.  Coincidentally I had just started jerking off while thinking about her.  When I was about to cum I turned on the camera, flipped it to the front camera, and then took a picture of my face as I was blowing my load while I imagined fucking her.  My face in the picture looked like a guy who had just been woken up.  I sent the picture to her and said, "Thanks, but your text woke me up!"  She responded "lol!!"  She never knew it was a picture of me blowing my load while thinking of her.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,875 Signs of morning sickness vs regular sickness??


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,873 I'm sitting in my office in front of my computer.  A coworker stops by to chat.  She's a good friend, blonde and a distance runner.  We commiserate about life, spouses, kids, and the general state of the world as she leans on the door frame . Our lives have a lot of parallel experiences.  I notice several hairs on my left forearm are stuck together.  No way she could see it from the distance we were separated.  It's a tiny drop of dried cum that somehow survived the morning shower. She'll never know it was the thought of her that I was beating off to earlier that morning.  I brush it off and continue the conversation.


likes: 3
comments: 0

203,872 I dream of screwing another guy. I'm middle aged and married to my wife.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,870 I keep hoping to hear from you, it's been two years. I guess I should stop hoping and accept that you are never going to knock on my door


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,869 Every year I buy a few bags of asphalt and fill in pot holes on my road. I do it out of necessity. I've gotten two flat tires over the years. Something I've noticed, the neighbors see me filling in the pot holes and never once has anyone said thank you. I keep on smiling though, even if it's a little less gleeful every year.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,868 My roomie folds her undies. She looks at me funny because I don't. Am I supposed to feel bad for this? Ridiculous. Undies don't need to be folded. Stop giving me that look!


likes: 6
comments: 0

203,866 I'm not sure what to think about this. I was getting a professional massage at the gym. I hurt my thigh while running. I thought a massage would work the kink out. The masseuse was male. I am am female. This shouldn't be an issue. I was covered by a towel. I've had a male masseuse before. This time tho his hand was under the towel and he was kneading my inner thigh. He did one leg going all the way up. By all the way up he was touching the part where my leg joins my pelvis. It wasn't my labia. He was next to my labia. Then he crossed over to the other leg and did the same thing going all the way up. Again all under the towel. Then as he was pulling his hand away his finger tips brushed right over my clitoris and labia. It seemed accidental. It wasn't a big deal. I wasn't offended. I never mentioned it to my husband tho. What was I going to say, "How was my day? Well same old same old, the masseuse at the gym touched my veejay...." Yes, better to skip that part.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,865 We had a vacation planned with a few of my relatives in September.
We all literally sat down this past weekend and paid the remaining balance.
Today they all canceled. One relative had a reasonable reason(health related), but everyone else? Typical FLAKES.
Oh well. They’re not getting full refunds.

My husband and I are still going. Fuck them.


likes: 5
comments: 2

203,864 I had a chance to sleep with a good friend's wife. It was her idea. He didn't know anything about it. I declined. I'm either a decent guy, or a dope. I'm still not sure which.


likes: 2
comments: 10

203,863 All the good things in life happen after midnight.


likes: 2
comments: 5

203,862 Falsely accusing a man of rape should be punishable by death.


likes: 2
comments: 11

203,861 My wife doesn't talk to me much so I spend most of my time online trying to start conversations with strangers.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,860 I don't remember what it feels like to ejaculate inside a woman. What makes this particularly sad is I'm married.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,859 I hate female biology. I do lots of good for people, but the one thing I ask is I don't want to know about a woman's biology issues. But lucky me, I work with women who leave a bloody mess in the toilet. Couldn't you flush? Isn't that just the slightest courtesy you can offer to the rest of us? I'm convince these women do it on purpose.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,858 American homes have mud rooms. Think about that. A room specifically designed for taking off your shoes. We have laundry rooms - for washing clothes. We have family rooms - for watching TV. We have movie theater rooms - for watching movies. We have computer rooms - for web surfing. We have all these very specialized rooms. But you know what I want? I want a sex room. A place to watch videos and play with toys. Why not? We have specific rooms for every other kind of whim. Why not sex?


likes: 0
comments: 7

203,857 Haven't had sex with the Mrs. in I don't know, 5 years? Married life.


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,856 My wife and I are out for Chinese food. I get one dish, chicken and cashews. She orders another, bean curd something or other. When the food comes out we share. At her insistence I try a little of hers, bean curd is definitely not my favorite. I tell her so with a smile saying I don't know how she eats it. She tries a little of mine. She says she really likes what I ordered. Halfway through the meal she calls the waiter over and tells him to pack up the rest of mine in a doggie bag. She tells me she'll eat it tomorrow for lunch. I nicely remind her that as much as it will make a nice lunch for her tomorrow, it is meant to be a nice dinner for me tonight. She tells me I can have the rest of her bean curd. She doesn't at all see the selfishness in her actions. This is a repeating theme with her. She takes what she wants because life is all about her.


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,855 Husband: Read this story about a come back to stupid anti-vaxxers.

Me: (reads the first line) Oh, you read this to me already. It was a good one.

Husband: That's impossible. The first time I read this was today.

Me: No, literally you read this to me like two weeks ago. Because the doctor comes back to the parent talking about conspiracy propaganda.

Husband: No, today is the first day I've read this. I've always personally believed this should be a come back, I just can't believe someone actually used it.

Well, believe it. You read this exact story to me weeks ago. And this is why I told you that you can't be stoned all day long anymore. These conversations are getting old.


likes: 0
comments: 7

203,853 My 12 year old daughter fainted the other day. Freaked me out. Later that day, when talking about what she was feeling when it happened, she asked me if that was what it felt like to die. That really freaked me out.


likes: 1
comments: 6

203,852 I'm ashamed to be a human being living on earth. We are such a cruel, dumb, shortsighted, destructive race. I wish I was not part of it.


likes: 8
comments: 5

203,851 I think this woman in the office has a crush on me.  But she's really pretty and I'm shy, and I'm terrified to even speak with her - what if I'm wrong?  That would be humiliating.  But once every couple of weeks I like to sit near this woman in the lunchroom (not too near!) so I can see her fidgeting and bouncing her leg and getting anxious out of the corner of my eye.  It makes me think that maybe if I ever talk to her I'd have a chance.


likes: 1
comments: 5

203,850 I can’t imagine what goes on in a person’s head when they decide to reproduce.

Why would you ruin your life like that?
I love my kids, but I can admit that I regret having them as well.

I did it, because I was told that I wouldn’t have a purpose otherwise. I got trapped in someone else’s nightmare I allowed them to create for me.
Loving them isn’t enough.

I miss me.


likes: 12
comments: 6

203,849 I haven’t had friend drama in a long time. I’m 31 and have been past that for a while now. Now I’m having a problem with a close friend from work and I don’t know how to handle it. I don’t feel like I can talk to her about it because she will take it VERY personally, and nothing good will come of it. I’m just going to vent here the way I wish I could...

A,

Lately, I’ve been needing a break from you. The way you’ve been acting is driving me nuts. I know you’re energetic by nature, but you’ve been downright obnoxious. Stop being rude to my boyfriend. I feel for you that you’ve been single for a long time and you want to find someone, but this isn’t an acceptable excuse to be low key snide to my guy. We don’t really want to call you to join us for drinks anymore because it’s not fun like it used to be. Now you just stir up arguments about politics and social issues and we’re just trying to have fun.

I don’t understand why you’ve been rude and difficult lately. I made a wrong turn when I was driving the other day, and you screamed at me. That was unnecessary! And then you start picking at me that I don’t know where I’m going. Yes, I did know where I was going, and if you don’t feel confident in my driving, then I guess you can drive from now on. You are rude to people in public, which is mortifying to me. I have social anxiety, and the attention your behavior draws to us has brought me to the brink of an attack. Also, I’m sorry you feel insecure about your breast size, but this is no excuse to make snide comments to me about mine. I had nothing to do with their size, so that’s kind of unfair to be rude to me about that.

It is driving me BONKERS that you’ve been acting like you know everything. You know that I don’t mind my opinions being challenged, but you challenge almost everything I say, even when it comes to topics that I studied during my master’s degree program. You also try telling me about things I’ve been studying for years even though you are fully aware of my expertise. Please, for the love of god, stop this. Also, just because you are older than me does not mean you get to lecture me about life. I don’t need to be told how to do things or told what decisions I should make. You interrupted me and started yelling at me about something that you made an incorrect assumption about. That was rude as hell and it took everything I had not to blow up on you.

Listen, besides all this, you’re a good friend. We’ve had each other’s backs many times and we’ve had a lot of fun together. But if this pattern continues I don’t know how much longer I can stand it. If something is bugging you, you can talk to me. I’m scared to bring any of this up to you because you take things so personally and I don’t want to hurt you. I hope this passes because it’s been extremely stressful....


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203,846 There's a nail salon around the corner from me called "Hand Job". I'm not kidding.


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203,845 My wife belongs to the church Our Lady Of Perpetual Anger.


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203,844 I sold my house. I moved to a rental. I was so pleased to get rid of the headache of owning a home. Things always break. I was always left tracking down repair guys and following through to get things fixed. I hated it.

But no worries right, I'm in a rental. Not my problem anymore.

Wrong.

It's hot out. The central air conditioning isn't working. I called my landlord, the home owner. He turned it around and asked me to find a repair guy. He told me to find three. To get quotes from each. Submit the numbers to him. Then he will decide who I should call to do the work.

You fucking kidding me??? I don't own this place yet I still have to do all the leg work when it comes to repairs??? My lease is up in two months. I'm seriously thinking of moving. Fuck the home owner. How crazy that he wants me to do his job.


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203,843 So she had to feed her friends pets , and I came over to their house. then we tried to get a quickie in, And of course the dog started sniffing my butt and trying to lick my cock.
No. We didnt continue. Damper.



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203,842 I think of you sometimes and wonder how you must feel now and what you think. Do you regret disappearing, reappearing and disappearing over and over again? Why did you do it to us?


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203,841 My friend's husband watches gay male porn. She's spied on him watching guys doing guys on his computer. Strange. I don't know if I could handle my husband watching gay shit.


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203,839 I've been googling how to get divorced. I'm half hoping he looks at my browsing history.


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203,838 I feel like an idiot for trusting my coworker, she’s a snake



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203,837 I have finally come to realize she doesn't love me.


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203,836 My sick friend isn't talking to me because I cleaned up some messes in his home. He became angry because he didn't want anyone to touch his things.

Okay, die alone then.


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203,835 The rich divorced surgeon met his new wife because she was working in Victoria Secrets and he was buying lingerie for yet a third woman. Somehow how I don't think this marriage is going to work out.


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203,834 My wife always orders the most expensive item on the menu. My kids know this. When we go out and my wife tells the waiter what she wants, my two sons look at me and give a little nod. It makes it bearable that they understand my pain.


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203,833 I am in my 40s. I am connected on Facebook to many people with whom I went to both high school and college. There are three guys that are single and in their 40s. They constantly post their health problems. They often post and tag them selves drinking at bars. The next day they whine about having gout.
They whine constantly about being single. And complain if a woman doesn’t text them back within five minutes. My point is I don’t understand how a seemingly intelligent person can have this much lack of self awareness.


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203,832 My dream died yesterday.


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203,831 I’ll always wish you were mine


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203,830 Thanks to everyone who sympathized when I told the secret about being diagnosed with breast cancer in my early forties.

My doctors originally thought the cancer was stage 3, but after the MRI they're saying it's stage 2, much more survivable. I've done 3 sessions of chemotherapy now, and the tumor and lymph nodes have shrunk a LOT. I'll still need at least a partial mastectomy though. God... so much cutting. There's going to be SO much cutting.

I've been nauseous but the meds take care of it pretty well, I've had flus that were worse. I haven't even noticed my hair thinning, either, it just seems the same as always. I'm desperately hoping it won't all fall out.

Not only that, but health insurance is covering the vast majority of it. I'll have to take some from my savings account, but since I've now met the deductible it won't wipe me out.

I'm still wondering how to tell my boyfriend and my family. No one knows anything except the medical staff. I'm always the person my loved ones go to for support, and I don't know how they'll take it. What if they can't handle it? What if it's too much for them and turns out that the supportive relationships were always one-sided? I couldn't take that.

How do you even start that conversation? "Hey honey, takeout sounds nice. Hello, Sis, how are the kids? Hi, Mom, glad you're enjoying that book club. By the way, I have cancer." WtF?

They want to put a chemo port in my chest, which means I won't have to get stuck so much with needles.  But then there won't be any way my boyfriend won't find out.

I'm so scared. I just don't want to die.



likes: 4
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203,829 I can't get the stench of your house out of my nostrils. I've tried inhaling water through my nose to rinse my nasal cavity. It helped a little. I think I have to do it a few more times. This sucks. My God how do you live that way!


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203,828 I've never had a iphone before this week. Typing on the iphone is ridiculously tedious. I think the younger generation doesn't realize how bad it is compared to a full keyboard. You guys are missing out.


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203,827 I think our roads are becoming very dangerous and Congress should intervene. The economy is booming, which is good. Companies are looking for workers, which is also good. But with all the online shopping going on, this means the shipping industry in particular is looking for truck drivers. What is happening is new truckers are on the road and they don't have the trucking mentality. They still think they are in their Jeep cruising around on a Friday night. They sit in the fast lane and refuse to move to the right. They race through a traffic light when it's yellow. They are immature and emotional and they will come after you if they think you cut them off. But they aren't in a Jeep. They are in a ten ton 18 wheeler. We saw it last month. Some young guy driving a truck at 90 mph and crashing into  others, killing a few. These new truck drivers are assholes. More innocent people will die. If you are out on the roads, stay clear of truckers.


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203,826 My friend's wife had surgery on her wrist for Carpel Tunnel syndrome. All is well again. But a few weeks ago, after a little too much wine, she told me why she developed Carpel Tunnel. She said because she jerks off her husband and it takes forever. Like an hour type of forever. She said he's losing the ability to have ejaculate, in other words, he's becoming impotent. But he still insists she jerk him off all the way. She tells me never before has a wife wanted so badly for a husband to lose interest in sex.

I probably shouldn't know all this abut my friend. But it is kind of funny.


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203,825 I'm a terrible human being. I am the worst. Everyone hates me. No one wants to be with me. I should be put to death. I know this.

Then I had to go away from my wife for a while (about a month)  volunteering with a group of people on a house-build project. It was weird. People started telling me what a nice guy I am. They would clamor to sit next to me at the group dinners. We'd laugh and tell stories. We did lots of good work on the build too. People wanted to work on whatever I was working on so we could pass the time chatting and having fun. At the end, they had an awards ceremony. Best with a hammer. Loses the most tools. Has no fear of heights. Makes the best dinner.  I won an award, the most personable guy. I almost cried.

Then I started thinking back. I've viewed myself as a horrible person because my wife constantly tells me I am. She puts me down and tells me what's wrong with me every chance she gets.  But in the new environment, suddenly I'm a good guy. You know what, I am a good guy. I always have been. I just forgot, which I think is exactly what my controlling wife was hoping for. My eyes have been opened.


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203,824 I’ve been waiting for my husband to love me for too long.
I’ve been waiting for him to give a shit about how I felt sexually. He never tried.
He was cheating.
Now he wants to work it out?
Now he wants to be enough for me?

Well, now I want to explore my other options. Hot men hit on me all the time and because I was a good wife and had a conscience I never reacted. I never cheated.

Game. On.
I’m ready to experience what I’ve been missing out on all these years.


likes: 3
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203,823 Ugh. I think I ruined my relationship. My boyfriend was freaking out because he thought I wanted to hurry up and get married because I would say things like, “I’m really happy with you. This is the nicest anyone’s ever been to me in a relationship.” Then he got all anxious that I was suddenly relying on him.

I corrected him on that. I reminded him that I’ve been on my own for years and I have a really good support system, lots of friends, and good relationships with my family. I told him that while I appreciate the nice things he does for me, times when he can’t help I do fine. So far, so good.

Here’s where I messed up: I got mad. I got offended that he thought I was desperate like that. I suddenly remembered all the times I’ve gotten stuck doing all of the cooking and cleaning in relationships when I paid half the bills and paid for half of the dates. I remembered doing all of the emotional work. I remembered giving blowjobs every day and making perfect dinners only to be ignored and not even spend 10 minutes per day with the guys in previous relationships.

I blurted all of this out and then said, “I don’t need a husband. It’s extra work for nothing. I won’t say I’ll never get married again but I really can’t imagine why I’d want to. This is a wonderful relationship and I love you. I’ll date you, but I have no idea how I’ll feel later on. I’ll outlive you and just end up dying alone, anyway so it really doesn’t matter. I’m happy to just enjoy things as they are.” I even said, “Why pay for the cow when I’m getting the milk for free? We have a good time together and I don’t have to clean your dirty underwear. That sounds like a pretty good deal to me!” I’m so dumb.


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203,822 I am so jealous of my white trash cousin.  She's a junkie, possibly recovering, who had two children taken away by DCF, but she's pregnant again.  Meanwhile my wife and I can't make even one baby.  I'd offer to adopt my cousin's, but I'm not sure she won't show up out of her mind on our doorstep and demand her babies back.


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203,821 The second my husband leaves for work, I turn on porn. I play it through the house sound system. I hope the neighbors hear it...


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203,820 The second my husband leaves for work, I turn on porn. I play it through the house sound system. I hope the neighbors hear it...


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203,817 This person I know from my childhood,  a friend on Facebook, is homeless. She had a car accident and couldn't work so she made a Go Fund Me to help raise the money to fix her car so she could work. I donated and she never so much as said thank you. Nice.


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203,816 I'm a little bit bitter at my ex ,mainly because I think the guy she's with now is amazing and she probably doesn't think I'm as great as she used to!
Or, bitter at myself.


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203,815 I am going to woo her one last time. Flowers, chocolate, dinner. Then we will fuck. Then I was dump her nasty ass.


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203,814 50 year old white guy here. Probably not supposed to say this, but even though I like the idea of Phish, I cannot stand their sound or their mojo. Jam band? Yikes! I'd rather spend that time in the dentist's chair getting teeth pulled while listening to Muzak. (Sorry Trey!)


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203,813 I once didn't poop for four days. There was no opportunity. I was traveling and would have to use public restrooms. Which I refuse to do. I thought no problem, I would eat a little on the light side and just hold it in for the week of my trip. I thought it was a workable plan. But two things: 1) When I did finally go, boom, it exploded out of me. I mean it went everywhere. It was splattered on the bathroom wall and floor. I should have cleaned it up but I'm embarassed to say I didn't. I went running out of there. Oh the poor janitor man who had to clean it up.  2) By the fourth day I noticed my ankles were swollen. It was like my body chemistry was affected by having all that waste still in me and my body was retaining water which accumulated in my bottom half. It scared me. I know old people get this condition when their heart isn't pumping correctly. It scared me so much I decided to finally poop and luckily by a day later my ankles looked much better.  Scary though. I hope I didn't do permanent damage.


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203,812 She is a beautiful brunette with pretty green eyes, a neatly trimed bush, my dream woman.
So she let me fuck her and i come inside her in like one second.
Sorry no second changes, but i still got to fuck the woman of my dreams.


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203,811 If I see a woman in her mid-20s has a little bit of acne on her face, I assume it's hormonal acne from birth control pills and that she likes to fuck and have the guy cum inside her.  Kind of a turn on.


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203,810 I'll be happy when June is over.


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203,807 Twice now when I walked past my coworker's cubicle I saw him looking at pictures of little girls in bikinis on the internet. I think he is a pedophile. I'm going to report him to our boss tomorrow. The pedophile needs to go.


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203,806 We die alone.  We lose alone.


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203,805 My heart still is sad when I think about you.


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203,804 I just want friends like the queer eye guys. The Fab Five seem like an AMAZING group to be friends with!


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203,803 I'm so lonely because I don't have any friends except my boyfriend. I had an old friend but I dumped her because she's not a very good friend. She went on and on about her shitty life without ever asking me how I'm doing. I never got a word in. I supported her but it wasn't mutual when I needed her. I could go out to the local spots, but nobody ever wants to hang out a second time, which leaves me even more depressed. I want friends I can talk to about my problems and theirs, who I can laugh with, go to the gym with, listen to music with, obsess over tv shows with, go out to dinner with, play sports with sit by a campfire with, go shopping with (and NOT talk about how much we hate our bodies, but just help each other buy stuff that looks good), go to book stores with, do face masks or get our nails done together, go to the fair with and actually riding on the rides instead claiming to be "too old", who I can talk about books with and show my notebooks to, maybe even write something together, write songs or make movies with, who I don't have to look good for because they aren't judging me on my appearance. I want people I can go on adventures with, go to canada with, go bunji jumping with!


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203,802 I'm sitting here pondering my life and the series of decisions I've made to get here.  You are my biggest regret, how could I not stop when all the red flags kept popping up.  I guess it is true that men think with their little head and not their big one.
It is what it is, no sense crying over spilled milk.
I've moved on. Hope you found happiness and what you were desperately seeking.


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203,800 Alright. I gave into my worst instincts and insulted you. I've not taken a deliberate stab at you before, but you've hurt me so much and turned out to be a total narc that I let that leak out.

That was one little tiny piece of a huge pie I'd love to throw in your face. Such as that you are not good in bed - there is no sense of connection whatever. That is why you keep seeking another piece of ass; because you never really connect with the person you are inside of. You tried to make me think so; staring at me in the face, etc. But your eyes are empty. It's only the pleasure you seek.But it's like a plug with a short circuited wire - you get the pleasure, but the connection never really happens. You're empty and not just your balls.

While I'm enjoying life and connecting with people, you are going to be out there trying to find another to get into bed with you. This is going to be funny, because you've created a lifestyle not too many high-value ladies are going to want to share...


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203,799 I lied to you. He was your child. But you were engaged to her at the time, and I didn't want to complicate your life. Then when you divorced her five years later, it seemed too late to tell you. And now that he's passed away, it's definitely too late to tell you. So it shall remain my secret.


likes: 4
comments: 1




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