secrets




add a secret
recent comments





207,787 I see where this is going. Bernie will win the nomination and he'll choose AOC as his Vice President. Many want free health care and free college. Lots of votes there. But also, women will vote for the pair because a woman is on the ticket. Lots of votes there too.They could win. Then Bernie dies in 5 more years and AOC becomes the first female president. Bet no one thought it was possible, but it could go this way.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,786 I was pretty much talking to someone a few days after I dumped you if not maybe earlier. Just like you did to me ;)


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,784 Sometimes I end up having to open those little safety seals with my teeth and I'm usually prepared to die if it poisons me.  


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,783 We never go out to eat. But something good happened. We wanted to celebrate. We went to what is known as the fanciest restaurant in town. The food was awful. Yuck. My one time to experience fine dining and it was terrible. I'm not doing that again.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,782 I just made a real estate sale in the past hour and earned $9K while sitting on my ass in my home office.  I can't share this on Facebook because I know some friends live paycheck to paycheck and I don't want to appear insensitive. I'm glad I found this site.


likes: 3
comments: 1

207,781 Someone opened their car door an put a dent in my car. Of course they never left a note. This makes me so sad. I don't have alot of money. I saved for two years to buy my car. Now it is dented. Fuck you asshole.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,780 Damn! What a waste! My ex had a boat but hardly ever went out on it. The weather had to be just right. Not too sunny, not too hot, not raining, and not too cool either.

Since you can’t depend on the weather, it was rare that the forecast and the actual weather matched up to his satisfaction. But oh, when we went, I loved riding on the poop deck! Funny thing, I think we went more often before he had a dock to tie to.

Such joy...  in moments...
Yet.
I am sure he will impress other ladies with his boat. Then leave it tied up most often once he has them tied down....
I would have fished or just rode in the rainy days too.

Thanks for the reminder. I will eventually get me a canoe, or a REAL boating enthusiast! (Don’t care if it’s owned or rented!)


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,779 The divorce became final yesterday and since you couldn't be bothered to file, it came to bite you in the butt. Be grateful that my mom raised a compassionate human being, because I could've been ruthless but I wasn't. I felt sorry for you and because of that, well, you're costing me more money. It's just money that I don't have, but $357.00 owed to the government means peace of mind. I'll figure it out, i always do. I'm sad, not because of the end of the marriage (it's been over for so long...) but because you became a stranger to me. I don't know you anymore, but maybe is for the best. Be well, stranger. Godspeed and the best luck to the next woman you meet on your journey, may she be strong like me and protects you from yourself.  


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,778 I may get sued by multiple parties here in the U.S., for selling UK real estate that may have turned into a ponzi scheme.  My buyers hold me responsible.  I'm not sleeping, find it hard to take a deep breath at times.  And when I'm feeling low, I reach the shit that you guys post and think hey, all of us have shitty lives, so suck it up.  Thanks for sharing your misery.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,777 They say you have to date somebody for six months before you start to see who they really are.

When I was in my 20s I dated this woman.  We made it to 7 months.  One day, I called her at work to make plans for the weekend.  She was in HR at the time and was telling me she was trying to hire a license practical nurse.  

I said something like, "Doesn't a licensed practice nurse require more training than a registered nurse?"

She almost yelled at me.  "NO!  A registered nurse has more training than a licensed practical nurse!  You always think you know everything and you don't know shit!!"

I was stunned.  Holy shit.  I think I said goodbye and hung up.  I don't recall.  But I drove back home and reality began to dawn on me that this was a woman with serious issues.  These were issues that I wanted nothing to do with.  

When I got home I saw she called me and left a message, promising that we were going to have great makeup sex.  But there wasn't anything that I needed to "make up" for, so I called her back.  She didn't pick up.  I left a message and told her we were done.  I wasn't having this insanity in my life.  I didn't care that, yeah, I dumped her via voicemail.  She wasn't worth speaking to in person.

I wonder what it is about the other bad wives I read about on this site... what made the guys not notice the signals that something was wrong?  Or maybe I'm just lucky and had a woman who wasn't smart enough to control her anger until after the ring was on.


likes: 0
comments: 10

207,776 My wife is just mean and disrespectful of me and our marriage. She thinks nothing of treating me badly. I don't think she likes me.

We had what I thought was a fun day. We had dinner. We kicked back and turned on the TV. I said I had to get to the market before it closed. I picked up a few items for the next day's dinner. While there I also bought a bouquet of flowers. I thought it was a nice gesture on my part. I came home. I handed her the flowers with a smile. I started to put away the groceries. She puts on a snarling face and with a mocking voice she says...

Flowers from the market, oh, flowers from the market, like I'm supposed to be impressed you gave me flowers from the market. I don't need your cheap ass flowers from the market...

It was like the whiny condescending voice middle school bully girls would use.

Then she stopped talking to me and went to bed.

I don't understand why she does this. It's not the first time. Things can be going along fine and then on a dime she lashes out at me. So bizarre that the trigger is me doing something nice. I mean I could understand if I was rude and she lashed out. But I do something nice and it sets her off. She's very unstable in this way. I'm never sure how she is going to react moment to moment. I need an explanation from her but of course whenever I try to discuss, she goes off on me. This is simply not a workable marriage.


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,775 I had a big old ugly mole on my chest. One day it fell off. I've never heard of anything like it. How could a mole fall off? But it did. I'm so thankful because to get it removed would have cost hundreds of dollars. Still weird to me tho.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,774 I have been forgetting to enjoy life.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,773 I'm scared I won't find a job. I'm 50 and haven't worked in over a decade (since my workplace was bought out), and it seems like no matter what I do to fix it (take computer classes, go to job fairs, etc.) It doesn't stick. Every job I've seen are just so complicated that it was exhausting just reading it! Right now I'm coding but I'm told that it takes YEARS to get a job in the field...I'm not stupid, show me what to do and consider it done! I *miss* having my own job and my own money....

I feel worthless.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,772 My neighbor is trying to sell his house for $800k. He bought his house 10 years ago at $1.8 million. He will be losing $1 million. He said this wipes out everything he has ever made in his lifetime. The housing market around here is destroying lives. San Francisco may be booming but New England is dying.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,771 My wife was getting dressed. She said to me, "Look out the window and see if my friends are here yet to pick me up."

This is what she does so often. She thinks she's the Queen and I'm her man servant. How ultimately lazy that she can't look out the window herself. It's like a power trip to tell me to do it for her.

I ignored her.

She said, "Well, are they here are not?"

To avoid the fight, I looked out the window. "No one is here."

She then said, "Well, stand by the window and tell me when they arrive."

Grrr.

In hindsight, I figured I had a few choices at that point:

1) I could punch her in the fucking face. Then once she crumpled to the ground, I put my hand around her throat and cut off her air supply. I would say, "Who do you think you are bitch? What makes you think you can treat me like shit?" This would lead to me going to prison.

2) I could say, "I'm not going to stand here by the window and wait for your friends. " This would lead to insults by her. Not only that, she'd tell her friends and family I'm a bastard husband.

3) I could say nothing. I could walk away. This would also lead to her maligning me, but it would be delayed is all.

4) I could say, "You are my wife and I love you. But I don't appreciate the way you treat me. I feel like you take advantage of me and get me to do things that make me feel put upon." I tried this once. Her response, "What are you? A fucking overly sensitive faggot? Grow the fuck up."

5) I could stand by the window and tell her when her friends arrive.

Which option would you choose?




likes: 0
comments: 13

207,770 I am a proud progressive Democrat.  Yet,  after more than 50 years on this earth,  I would now never vote for a woman for any political office.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,769 Everyone's story ends in death.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,768 You’re a passive aggressive, manipulative, manic woman - you need to be medicated. You are not my supervisor in any way, we are coworkers. If you cc me on anymore emails with some bullshit, ambiguous question about when I will be accomplishing “x,” I will go postal on your ugly mug.

Lose my number, my email, in fact don’t even speak to me or look at me. PERIOD.

Take a long walk off a short cliff, we can’t stand you.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,767 In 10 minutes, I have a call in conference call.  I'm interested in listening in, but I really have little to contribute and therefore, I plan on muting the phone while taking a dump.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,766 I woke her up by rubbing her whole body then worked my way down until I was stroking her pussy. When it was soaking wet I put a finger inside. I work her until she grabbed my hair.  That was my cue to lick, bite, and kiss all they was down her body. I licked her clit until she shook and told me to stop. She said that was good. Then I told her to “come over here”. She rode me as we talked dirty to each other and then I filled her with cum.  What a great morning. Don’t even care that I got an hour and a half less sleep.


likes: 4
comments: 1

207,765 I'm old. I remember when they were called alligator pears.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,764 I have low standards when it comes to men. It's a problem.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,763 Tupac is still alive.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,762 On Valentines Day I went on a date with myself. I was going to get a half price ticket to a play, but decided instead to go to the movies. There are so many Oscar movies I never saw because basically I have no life outside of work. One day I'd like to go to the movies on a real date, but until then, I got this.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,761 I'm the life of the party ---- if it's a pity party.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,760 I work with a gorgeous 28-year old woman.  She's been seeing the same guy since college.  She lives with him now.  I've seen a picture of him.  Average guy, nothing flashy, thin and scrawny and kind of looks like a beta male, but maybe some girls would find him cute.

She refers to him as her "partner."  Today she mentioned that she's lucky she's never planning on getting married.

I'm thinking what she means is that she's never planning on getting married... to him.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,759 I think the moldy whopper ad is disgusting. The image turns my stomach. No way I want to rush out and go to Burger King.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,758 I have trouble controlling my facial expressions. Someone says something dumb and I immediately make a face like that someone is an idiot. I'm trying to work on this but so far I'm losing the battle.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,757 I smell my toenail clippings.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,756 I don't want my cock to be in a guy's mouth, but I would like to stand over a guy while he's kneeling. I could then jack off and shoot my jizz into his mouth.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,755 I get tired of even thinking about this virus situation on the ship in Japan. Stupid decision after stupid decision. Each day there were about 80 new cases being reported onboard. So what did the authorities do?  Today they began releasing all the passengers. They are free to go. They hopped in taxis, and on buses, and on subways, and left to take commercial flights back to their home countries. Like what the f*ck? You know 80 of them will present symptoms tomorrow. You know that's going to happen. What did they think, 80 new cases a day, but as soon as the passengers left the ship the illness would be wiped from their bloodstream and 80 would suddenly go to 0? Ridiculous that the passengers were free to travel on mass transit. Like oh my god how crazy.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,754 I chose two of the godparents for my kids. My wife chose the other two. My sister is one I chose. She's so remarkably generous. Every year she sends a box of gifts on my daughter's birthday. Not only that, once my daughter turned 16, my sister would also include a check for $1,000. I mean, wow. She's like the world's most generous godmother.

The other person I chose was my friend from college. He's my son's godfather. Unfortunately my friend died. But what did he do? He left my son $50,000 in the will. Jeez, what a kind thing to do.

The two godparents my wife chose, after the first year we never heard from them again.

Just sayin.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,753 BEING A GOOD HUMAN SUCKS.

I am always last.


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,751 My ex writes a column for a technical magazine. Readers send in questions and she researches and publishes an answer. I googled her recently and read some of her columns. I noticed something. She's full of shit. There was a question by a familiar name, her sister. I found another question from her best friend. Another from someone with her mother's maiden name. I think she's making it out like all these people ask her questions. But in truth she's making up the questions so she has something to write about. It's a little thing but it shows once again how journalists have zero integrity.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,750 Sure, that makes sense.





likes: 0
comments: 0

207,749 Old Spice is a waste. I bought some. I put in on after a shower. The scent lasted for a minute and then faded to zilch. Great. So all those many people passing through my bathroom the exact minute I get out of the shower, they will know I put some on. But for everyone else on the train or the people at work, they will never know. So what the fuck is the point of putting on Old Spice?


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,748 Where I live, it's the uneducated people who spend the most time on the town facebook forum telling the rest of us what we're doing wrong.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,747 My wife had a friend over. They were sitting in the kitchen drinking wine. I walked into the kitchen. She called my name followed by, "What was the name of the Robertson's dog, the little tan one?" The Robertson's lived next door to us 10 years ago when we were first married.

I said, "I'm afraid I don't know anymore. It was many years ago."

"What do you mean you don't know? It wasn't that long ago. I think you know but you aren't telling me. Of course you know." Then she turned to her friend and continued, "This is what he does. He knows things but he can't be bothered to tell me. He acts like I'm bothering him. Like he's so important he can't be bothered to take a moment to answer a simple question. He knows damn well what the dog was called. He never forgets these things. But he's being a dick is all. He's always being a dick. He's embarrassed of me. He hates me. He's not a good man, no not a good man..."

Would you stay married to this woman?


likes: 0
comments: 12

207,746 I hate parents and their kids in public. Most of them shouldn't exist, flat out. Most people had them by accident or just because it was what's expected, then they're stuck with them so they rationalize. We don't need your kids. They aren't special. You are not a selfless or good person because you raise kids. Get off your ego trip and stop polluting the planet with more people. Focus on salvaging this place for the kids who are already here.


likes: 2
comments: 4

207,745 Recently I've been seeing a new buzz word on social media: flexitarian. It's not a vegetarian. It's not a meat-only eater. A flexitarian is someone who eats both meat and vegetables.  Thank you social media for inventing this new word. We really needed something to describe this very unusual situation where someone eats both meat and vegetables.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,744 Women know that in order to get a man, they need to be on their best behavior. They seem to forget though if they want to KEEP them, they have to still behave. Perhaps even better than before. So many women turn into hags after they snag a man. They think they can treat them however they want and then wonder why the guy cheats or dumps them. Yelling, nagging, no sex, demanding, mean. They want to be treated like queens but refuse to treat their men like Kings.

I saw this happen so many times and determined that was not going to be me. When I got married, I swore I would treat my husband even better than when we were dating and I have kept my word for over 20 years . We are still happily married because I treat him extremely well and therefore he treats me well. I'm not perfect by any means but I try my best every day to be a loving and respectful wife. I am pleasant, I smile a lot, I cook and clean, I try to do nice things for him every day. I am happy to have sex whenever and however he wants. I love to give him blowjobs daily. I keep myself looking sexy for him. I love to serve him and cater to him  .I'm basically a chef in the kitchen, a maid in the living room and a porn star in the bedroom. (well I try to be lol. I know I'm not as great as a professional). But he appreciates my efforts :)

As a result we hardly ever fight and he loves being home with me. And when we do have our disagreements and he gets mad, it's usually as simple as giving him a sweet smile, lifting my shirt, shaking my boobs for him and all is forgiven. It's really not that difficult :)

F/41/married 20 years




likes: 7
comments: 5

207,743 For years I've been fighting the tax increases in my town. Before I started speaking up the town officials would spend frivolously on things like a $10,000 hair dryer for the dog pound ........ you know, in case they picked up a lost dog and it was raining and they had to dry him off, and a regular hair dryer wouldn't do, no, can't use just a regular hair dryer for $29, so they needed a $10,000 hair dryer.

I have been quite successful and keeping taxes down. Increases have only been about 2% per year for the last dozen years. The Mayor hates me. I've taken away all his fun by making a huge fuss in the papers whenever he tries to spend money on unnecessary items.

But last year I sold my house. I downsized into an apartment. I don't pay property taxes anymore. I did some soul searching on this and decided I will no longer fight the tax increases. It's up to the home owners now to fight their own battles. I'm done.

This years proposed tax increase? A whopping 12%. The Mayor is a very happy man now that I'm out of the picture. He's ready to spend up a storm.

My point? People, you can change things for the better, but you have to put in the effort. Don't assume someone like me will always be there to bail you out. Pay attention to what your local government is doing and speak up.


likes: 3
comments: 3

207,742 Just got another of those “send bitcoin, and we won’t show your entire database video of you pleasuring yourself watching porn” nonsense letter.  What was funny though is this guy’s generosity, as he said:

After receiving the payment, I will delete the video and you will never hear me again.
I give you 50 hours (more than 2 days) to pay.

Wondering what am I supposed to do with those two extra hours he has provided me?



likes: 1
comments: 5

207,741 There’s an attractive young woman I see on my commute.  She’s really quiet and kind of mousey looking and keeps to herself.  I’ve been trying to get a “read” on her to see if maybe I can initiate a conversation.  Just the usual stuff to see if she’s noticed me, like standing near her once in a while to see if she glances at me and does the hair over the ear thing.

But there’s been no reaction from her end.  Zilch.  It’s like I don’t even exist.

Today I was able to get a glimpse of her phone wallpaper when she turned it on.  There was an up-close picture of a young woman’s face in a somewhat seductive pose.

Wow- she’s a lesbian?  That would explain her totally ignoring me.  But now it turns me on to know she’s a lesbian.  Young lesbian couples are freaky.  It’s hot to think about this cute, quiet young woman eating pussy and getting rammed with a dildo and scissoring her girlfriend.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,740 Every guy I've given a blowjob has screamed out when he came.  Some more gutteral than others but they all have definitely shouted out.  Loudly.  At first it was unexpected and frightening but I have since gotten used to it.

F/39


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,739 Do you think there will be no consequences to your actions?

Wrong.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,738 Hmmmm. It’s time to see if I can actually be the submissive without wanting to be the kickass dom that I know I am....  Now if only he would agree then I know my sexual desires will be attained.  To be continued.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,737 I don't know how to forgive.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,736 I hit dislike on a Davie504 video because he was dressed up as a girl and tried to talk to guys online asking if he/she made them hard. It was weird and concerning. A minute after I hit the dislike button he banned me from his youtube channel. The guy has issues.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,735 Day 13 of my diet. I still haven't weighed myself. I use a different yardstick. I have these four pairs of pants.

1) Blue lined khakis. Waist 38. These are what I have been wearing almost every day since the summer.

2) Blue corduroys. Waist 36. These use to be my fat pants for a few years until I outgrew them.  

3) Red lined khakis. Waist 34. I haven't fit in them for years.

4) Blue jeans. Waist 32. Ha, how long has it been? 20 years since I wore them? I've moved several times since then. I can't believe I bothered to bring with me all this time. But I knew. I knew I wanted to keep them as a goal.

Alright, so I'm on day 13 of this diet and guess what? I'm wearing my blue corduroys. I thought there is no way they will fit, but they did. Take that world! I'm so inspired. I think I'm going to celebrate by..... going out and walking another few miles.


likes: 8
comments: 2

207,734 I took a bath today an gave myself the best orgasm. I still feel warm and calm. Ahhhh.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,733 I use my mom's amazon account to buy books for school. A book didn't arrive. I had to look through the orders to see what happened. I saw my mom bought a vibrator. I find this hilarious.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,732 i think most politicians have mental issues.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,731 I watch videos of people losing hundreds of pounds of weight. It makes me cry. I'm M,37, 300+ pounds and growing.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,730 The couple are self appointed social media warriors. The husband posts about drug overdoses and substance abuse and how we need to steer young people away from these killers.

At the same time his wife posts about all the fancy cocktails she makes and how happy hour is the highlight of their day.

Gee, I wonder why the kids think drinking is fun.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,729 When I ask my wife when she will be running her errands on weekends, it's less about me keeping tabs on her as figuring out when I can watch my porn without her knowing how I fill my days.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,728 My wife's brother's family was over last night.  My nephew is four and was doing his thing with my young boys.  I was watching them all interact and realized my sons were profoundly more intelligent at the same age.  My nephew isn't dumb, he's just average, like my sister-in-law.  Nice kid, though.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,726 Fucking older men is the best. They always comment on how perky my tits are. That’s lovely to hear when you have a pair of 32DDs.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,723 Every time I watch Netflix it stalls and I have to wait anywhere from 10 seconds to 10 minutes for the movie to start up again. I'm usually very forgiving, but come on, this is getting silly. I think it's time to cancel Netflix.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,722 It has almost been fourteen days so the quarantine of the Diamond Princess ship in Japan is due to end in a few days. All the passengers will be released and are free to fly back to their home countries on commercial airliners.

Are they really that dumb?

There were 70 new cases today. That means some passengers could have been newly exposed to the virus today - but we won't know until 14 MORE days have passed.

Each time a new passenger comes down with the virus, they need to reset the 14 day quarantine period. Does a layman like me really need to explain this to the experts? I guess so.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,721 So many trolls in our world. They just want to contradict what others are saying for the sake of... well... nothing. Their goal is to  cause a problem. I'm so damned tired of them. I swear I'm going to bop one in the nose.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,720 I'm so sad. I dog sit for a friend. She goes away once a month or so. She drops the dog off with me for anywhere from 1 day to 5 days. This is a long weekend. I guess she knows I don't have a life. She's off living it up somewhere. I have nowhere to go. So she gives me her dog to look after. The sad part. I bought a new reading chair last weekend. The dog chewed up one of the legs today. I don't have much. The chair made me happy. Now I see a ripped up piece of ratty furniture. I'm so sad.


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,719 I took my wife out to dinner. Her two sisters came along. I treated everyone. On the car ride home my wife started yelling at me for not driving faster on the highway. (I go the speed limit.) I mean like condescending yelling where she mocked me for being such a boy scout. I'm so done with her and her family. Aren't there any good women out there?


likes: 1
comments: 6

207,718 Would you please come back online please?


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,717 Fuck you Nick. Like truly fuck you. You used my being sexually assaulted as your out and you ghosted me. I didn’t cheat on you, I got forced at knifepoint to give some guy a blowjob. That’s rape, but you turn your back on me and make
Me feel like a piece of trash because it’s more convenient for you to act like I did something awful and you are all squeaky clean. You took something that was truly horrific for me and made it worse without a second thought and I really loved you. I still do. Don’t think that your perfect looking image has any merit. It doesn’t. You have left me probably unable to ever trust a guy again. You shamed me when I needed you
And I’m not okay and I don’t know if I’m going to be okay ever again. So fuck you!


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,716 What????

"On his return from China last week, Dr. Ian Lipkin quarantined himself in his basement. His wife now puts his food on the stairs. He’s run out of things to watch on Netflix. At odd hours, he walks in New York's Central Park, keeping 10 feet away from others."

As part of his quarantine he takes walks in Central Park? You kidding me? Does that makes sense to anyone? Quarantine means you stay away from people. You don't go for walks in one of the busiest parks in the world! Doh!

https://www.yahoo.com/news/home-quarantine-travelers-buys-time-140311567.html




likes: 2
comments: 15
flagged

207,715 My husband was a cheating POS.
He went to therapy. So did I. He is genuinely remorseful and I make him cry about it about every month, give or take. I am not letting him off so easy. In the meantime, as he tells me how much he loves me, washes the dishes, takes me out on dates, snuggles me and dotes on me...I’m disgusted by how pathetic he is. How much of a bastard he has been.
I’m getting a boob job. He’s paying for it.
Then I’m cheating. And then I’ll be able to be nice to him again without faking it.
It’s sad how my brain works, but it’s how I am made.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,714 How is that lawsuit coming along?


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,713 If they call it manners in the Midwest or South; then why is it called “being fake” in California?

Signed, a truthful (aka “rude”) Northeasterner.

(Yes Midwesterners, I’m calling you Fake. They take awhile to get stuff.)


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,712 I’m scared of dying, but I’m even more terrified of living my life alone. I’m 32 and none of my relationships have worked out. I’m financially independent with a career and masters degree, no drama, no shadiness, love sex, not clingy. I’m kind but have a backbone. I have goals, cute dogs, and generally just have my shit together. I’m told I’m physically attractive. I feel like none of this is enough. What am I lacking? My siblings and friends are finding love and getting married, and it crushes my soul when I’m asked if I’m seeing anyone. This is the only area in my life where I have been failing. I heard someone say that women who don’t marry by 30 are damaged goods and have something wrong with them. I know it’s not true, but I cried my eyes out anyway.

It would probably be easier to take what I can get, but I absolutely refuse to settle. The idea of spending the rest of my life alone scares me to my core. It’s so sad to me. I’ve been keeping this inside because all anyone did when I first tried talking about this was tell me that I should be grateful for the other things I have. Gee, thanks, why didn’t I think of that myself...


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,711 I swore I saw you in my area tonight. Geesh, the man looked like you but not as handsome as you.  I wish it was you.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,710 Your wife doesnt love you - sheesh!


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,709 I tried to cum in my wife's mouth. She never let's me do it. I decided to make it happen without her knowing it was happening. I was very quiet about it. I acted like I wasn't even close. No heavy breathing on my part. Meanwhile I was getting closer and closer to the edge. I was sure I could get a blast in there before she realized what was going on. She'd spit it out right away but at least some would be on her tongue.

5...4...3...2...1 - She pulled my dick out of her mouth at literally the last second. I splooged on myself. Damn. How did she know?

Tell me, is there a way you can tell a guy is about to pop?


likes: 0
comments: 17

207,708 Bloomberg wants Hillary as his Vice President? What a bone head he is. I will never vote for him now.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,707 My son wont listen. Hes lazy and plays video games day and night. I beg him to stop. Im old and tired. Im ill. I dont have the mental strength to argue with him any more. Hes throwing his life away. He is making my life so unhappy. He dont care.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,706 It might sound pointless, but I intend to refer to the virus of current global concern as the Chinese coronavirus.  If China wants to bully airlines, sporting organisations and other bodies into referring to Taiwan by the bullshit name of "Chinese Taipei" in an attempt to get the rest of the world to implicitly acknowledge China's purported ownership of Taiwan, then they can fucking well take ownership of the virus as well, one that originated from bringing diseased wild animals into a place where food for human consumption is sold.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,705 The virus is the next step in our virtual evolution to an online existence. No one will go to the mall anymore. Amazon will get even more business. Disney World will suffer. As will movie theaters, Broadway, sporting events, mass transit, church attendance. Schools will close. Online learning will prosper. This is it, the end of our way of life as we know it.


likes: 2
comments: 1

207,704 I tried to kill myself with Tylenol last night but I threw up on myself instead. I guess I'll continue drinking myself to death instead


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,703 Husband is leaving today.......I just found a video of his side piece giving him head in our vehicle. I knew about her but thought it was a one time thing or like a short one week thing.....he tells me Yesterday (VALENTINE'S DAY) that it infact was for 4+ months while I was pregnant with his 4th child .


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,702 $238 million paid out from insurance to his wife. America is definitely odd.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,701 Mentioned last week that I saw a suggestion to switch out bread crumbs for chopped macadamia nuts as a coating for my salmon recipe.  Yesterday, I received a gift bag with a small package of nuts inside.  I guess her idea of a gift is to make me cook for her?


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,700 Did I hear that wrong?? Kobi Bryant's family is charging people money for his funeral?

America is a strange country.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,698 For years I’ve done something special on my husbands bday, father’s day, our anniversary, xmas, etc. It was difficult, but I quit doing it bc he never even noticed, never appreciated it, never reciprocated. I don’t expect a big deal out of my days, just some recognition, and he has actually forgotten and let me go an entire bday/mothers day whatevs without a single “happy ... “ much less giving me a gift or doing a nice gesture. So I’m done with recognizing holidays/special days as far as he is concerned.  


So for valentines day, our 14 yr wedding anniversary, dude went all out. Bought me all kinds of useless shit, my favorite dinner, cake, actually cleaned the house. It was all very nice, but you best believe I ate that shit, enjoyed having a clean house that I didn’t have to clean, thanked him and went the fuck to sleep. I don’t owe him a goddamn thing and if he thought I was going to sleep with him after working >40 hrs this week, he’s fucking stupid.


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,697 I gave my wife three presents for Valentines Day. She gave me nothing. I think she realized how bad she looked, so she suddenly said her plan was to give me sex tonight as my special present. But when the evening came around, she snuck off to bed and was asleep before I knew it.

You'd think she'd feel guilty or something. But no. This is her superpower, to think only of herself.


likes: 1
comments: 5

207,696 Lana, yes.  

Billie, NO


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,695 It's fascinating watching my wife try to teach our puppy a new trick. She assumes the dog already knows the trick and my wife just has to use the right word. She'll want him to roll, so she says, "Roll... roll... roll." When that doesn't work - and why would it, the dog has never been shown this trick before - then she tries "Turn... turn... turn...." The dog just lays there of course, so she says "Flip... flip... flip..." She doesn't get the idea that she has to teach the dog and that it's not about finding the right magic word. My god she is an idiot. Dog's pretty smart thought, when my wife went out I taught the dog to roll.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,694 I had a dear friend who died a few years after we graduated high school. Her gravestone says "Gone Shopping". It still makes me laugh and cry every time time I see it.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,693 I don't know how I "friended" you on Facebook.  I probably fat fingered it with the touchpad screen on my iPad.  My kid likely just hit the "friend" button while he wandered around my iPad or phone.  All I know is that sometimes close friends are unfriended, and complete strangers are added.  I assume he doesn't understand what's going on and that he's doing it.

That being said, if you wanted anybody not to friend you, why the hell would you send a message telling them not to friend you?  Just click no!  Or block them!  Either are fine because I don't know you.  

Instead, you send me a message telling me not to friend you.  That makes no goddamn sense.  First, it went into the "message requests" folder that I only check once every two months, so it's not the most efficient way to get a person to ignore you, right??  Second, why would you make contact with me if you want me to ignore you?  Especially when you don't have to because you just have to hit the block button?  It's like knocking on your neighbor's door and getting up in his face to tell him to ignore you.

Are you TRYING to find an excuse to talk to me?  Because otherwise you just seem like just another strange attention whore.  


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,692 My wife was not expecting flowers from me today, but when I saw a side street vendor, I pulled in and inquired.  I wanted a dozen roses, and was prepared to pay $20.  He had packages of 24 roses, refused to break up the packaging and tried to upsell me to spend $30."  I shook his hand and walked away.  Homey don't play that; not even on Valentine's Day!


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,691 Have never shared this with anyone; not even my wife of 25 years.  I learned when I was dating my most recent ex, that the love of her life, was my childhood neighbor, and long before he ever went down on her, he was doing the same to me.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,690 My plan is to get thin and then cheat on my husband.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,689 There's a woman I know from Facebook. Man is she a dimwit as well as a bad soul. She says dumb things and mean things. I notice recently she's been posting memes saying that if people don't like you, it's because they have hate and anger inside, and it has nothing to do with you. Um, in her case, wrong. She's entirely dis-likeable. Deep down she knows it. She posts these memes over and over, not for us, but to make herself feel better about how awful she is. Yes L, I'm talking about you.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,688 Lexipro gives you diarrhea!  =(


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,687 I've seen women and high school girls wearing clothing with the PINK logo on it. I thought nothing of it until I was told it's from Victoria's Secret and PINK is a reference to their vagina.

Really? You walk around with a large vagina ad on your clothes and you wonder why women are thought of as sexual objects?


likes: 2
comments: 8

207,686 I live in a city that currently has a major issue with drug use. It is a severe problem.  Our downtown is just riddled with dirty needles and junkies begging for change.  yet nothing is ever done.  They just keep handing them clean needles so they can dump the dirty ones on the ground.

Everyone is sympathetic to them for some reason.  They all cry out "it's not their fault it's mental illness.  We need more funding!".  Honestly fuck that and fuck you!  I can't even bring my kid to the park because there are fucking dirty needles and tourniquets everywhere.  Every time I hear about one of them overdosing I can't help but think good riddance.  I honestly hope they all fucking die. I have no sympathy for any of them or anything that happened to them.  I do not give a single fuck that you had a tough childhood. That doesn't give you the right to break into cars for loose change and leave your disease ridden needles on the ground.  Either get help or kill yourself. If I'm being honest I'd rather you just kill yourselves instead of wasting tax dollars treating your fake affliction you fucking piece of shit junkies.


likes: 7
comments: 4

207,685 Three times I dated women and each of them said I should see a shrink. This sounds bad right? It sounds like I must have issues if three separate women said the same thing. But I'm wondering if it was just meant as a nasty insult. The comment was never said during a warm loving moment of the relationship. It was always said as part of a breakup fight. So I'm wondering, has anyone else out there been told by a partner to see a shrink? I'm thinking if it's an insult these women came up with, then it has happened to others too, and not just me.


likes: 0
comments: 8

207,684 For today only, I'm calling the wife "My Love." Tomorrow, I'll go back to calling her things like "Boobs," "Gina," and "Angelbutt."  I'm a true romantic at Valentine's Day.



likes: 2
comments: 0

207,683 I refuse to try to learn how to pronounce "Tagovailoa" until the Miami Dolphins make their draft selection.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,682 The Masked Singer would be much better without the fake reactions from the panel. It's so cringy


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,681 In 2006, I met the President and took a picture with him that is framed and on my office wall.  I used to show it off on Facebook all the time.  USED TO!


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,680 I'd vote for John Kelly as President. He's probably too smart to want the job, though.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,679 I don't like having a dog.


likes: 2
comments: 2

207,678 I think of people from my past all the time. I'm talking about people from 20 years ago. I wonder if anyone ever thinks of me.


likes: 3
comments: 3

207,677 We have 4 kids, we somehow avoided every lice outbreak in elementary school, which was a miracle.
My 17 yr daughter got lice from the family she babysits for, it's the stubborn resistant to chemical type.
I really thought we were passed this point.
Nope, all 6 of us have them and we are in a war to remove them from our lives. One we are losing....


likes: 1
comments: 9

207,676 I still have the nude picture you sent me on Valentine's day 6 years ago. Not sure if it's me wanting closure or if I just like to remember what your naked body looks like why I haven't deleted it yet.
Either way it's a great picture


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,675 Wife swap?  Sure! One condition: No take backs.


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,674 I'm on day 9 of a self-invented diet and exercise regime. I'm probably going too far. I've been eating about 600 calories a day. I have been perfect so far. I have not slipped up once. I haven't weighed myself so I don't know if I'm losing any pounds. My blood pressure has come down though. A few months ago I was at the doc and my pressure was 165 over 95. Yesterday it was 137 over 83. If can keep this up for four months in theory I should lose 60 pounds, which is my goal. Four months is such a long time. Sigh.


likes: 2
comments: 1

207,673 I had to admit to myself recently that I’m neither passionate nor driven by anything, as much as this probably doesn’t help me at all I’m at ease now~


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,672 I’m interested why she contacted me today!!!!


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,671 A woman I know just posted a happy birthday message for her 10-year old dog.

I couldn't help but think, what did the dog think when it kept seeing it's owner bring stranger after stranger into their house and fuck them?  Had to have been at least 20.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,670 I like when bad things happen to the people I know. I'm not a good friend.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,669 I have embraced gaining weight. I think I look healthier than compared to when I was smaller.

32/f


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,668 I'm going to a bacon festival. Life is grand!


likes: 3
comments: 1

207,667 My two adult children don't speak to each other. The say they hate each other. I feel like I failed as their parent.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,666 Funny. I just realized that I don't care any more. About anything.


likes: 3
comments: 3

207,665 For dinner I mostly serve my kids frozen junk food zapped in the microwave, and a can of soda. They eat in their rooms. The Norman Rockwell pose of a family eating a roast at the dining room table has never happened in this house. I'm a bad mom.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,664 When I don't get at least a handful of likes on my Facebook posts, I always say "My friends suck."


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,663 When people post group photos of them and their girlfriends on Facebook, I usually scan the faces and say to myself, "I'd fuck her, and her, NOT her, nnnh, not her either, definitely her etc.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,662 I'm on a call, when another one comes in.  I explain, I'm on the other line and ask "can I call you back?" He gives me his name, and I ask for his number.  "You got it," he said.  "No, I don't," I replied. "You do have it" he repeated. I said, "I don't, and I don't have time for your games."  Then I hung up.  I did have it, but it pissed me off that he made me work so fucking hard to get it, that I did not call him back.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,661 I get a little puzzled when I hear the term "elite" used as an insult. The Republicans used to be the party of the "elites". It was the party of the Rockefellers, the Fords, the Gettys. Republicans were proud of the best & brightest. Hell, Trump himself would have been considered elite. When did that change?


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,660 For the past 20 years, any time a man has asked me “what are you wearing?” I have always responded with “nothing but rubber gloves.” It has elicited a lot of different reactions, but never deterred any of them.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,659 When I moved here, it was to get away from drugs, not so I could live with some 18 year old junkie who tweeks outside my window until three in the morning. You’re damn right I told the landlord about that, you fucking kidding me?

“You’re a rat.”

No, I’m a person who works ten hour days who doesn’t want to come home to burnt foil on the floor and sketchy random ass people hanging outside my window while they either sell or buy whatever it is they’re smoking. It’s nice your mom and dad pay your bills so you have no reason to wake up at 5 in the morning, but the rest of the world isn’t going to accommodate to your pathetic lifestyle.

Pack your shit and go back to whatever fucking gutter you overdosed in. You’re an embarrassment to humanity.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,658 What I miss most from my childhood - frozen Milky Way bars.


likes: 1
comments: 6

207,657 In New Hampshire, Sanders received 4,000 more votes than Buttigieg, therefore they are both awarded the same number of delegates. Hmmm.

In Iowa it is even worse, Sanders received 6,000 more votes than Buttigieg. As a result, Sanders is awarded 12 delegates, whereas Buttigieg is awarded 13.

Secret: Yes, the system is broken.




likes: 0
comments: 2
flagged

207,656 I wonder if you still feel like you made a mistake in marrying her ... JM


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,655 You know that your children will learn and sometimes repeat the silly things you say, but I was surprised to hear my daughters chant this one, from out of the blue. "I like it. I lick it. I like to lick it."


likes: 2
comments: 2

207,654 The head of my cock has turned a deep purple color. WTF?


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,653 Before I send an email to a group, I send it to myself in a different account. I check that all the images come through and that all the links work. Then I send it to the group. It amazes me that so many people are too lazy to check their email before making a group send. Broken links and blank images abound. It's okay if the email was sent to a few friends. But I'm talking about the PTA sending broken emails to 5,000 parents. Sooooo lazy!


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,652 The good news: The price of tickets to take a cruise have gone way down.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,651 Had the best 60 minutes of my life this weekend. It’s Sunday, 4:45 ish, and I’m bored and alone, and decide to have a strong drink while watching TV.

By 5 p.m., I’m feeling really good, and the Mrs. returns home and is receptive to going to the other room.  After sex, I close my eyes and zonk out.  

Wake up 20 minutes later feeling refreshed and decide to go to my computer where I read that I just made a real estate sale.

Then I headed into the kitchen and zapped some leftover pepperoni pizza.

A good buzz, sex, sleep, pepperoni pizza and made some money.  Not too shabby for a Sunday afternoon.  



likes: 13
comments: 0

207,650 I am over this...  I have never seen a bunch of adults that cannot resolve issues and cannot have decent conversations with others.  BUT if you a man, you get protected.  It sad if you are a woman because they will only make sure that you go down and protect a man no matter what.  


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,649 I made much better decisions in my second marriage.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,648 The problem with my marriage is my wife. There are two main issues.

1) She's selfish. She does whatever she wants. She wants a new dress, she buys it. She wants a case of fancy wine, she buys it. She wants to go on a trip, she goes. I pay and pay and pay. All along I've asked her to cut down on the spending for herself. She has refused. I asked her to get a job so she could at least cover some of her expenses. After years of prodding she  finally went on a job interview. It lasted 20 minutes. She returned home three hours later. She figured as long as she was in the city she'd buy herself more things. She came back with clothes and makeup. She never got the job.

2) She treats me so badly. Every encounter with her involves her expressing how unhappy she is with me or someone else. She'll wake up in the morning and immediately start complaining about our mattress. She demands a new one. I make breakfast and she complains the coffee isn't very warm. She becomes livid. She says she's warned me about the coffee before. [She has warned me? What am I her servant?] There is never any appreciation from her. It's constant demands from her on what I should be doing to make her life better. How has the marriage turned into this. She has lost her way. She has forgotten we are a partnership. She thinks life is all about her. I've got to end this.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,647 A telemarketer called. He was selling subscriptions to Sirius Satellite Radio. I always hang up on telemarketers. But I could instantly tell this fellow was an old man. He said he was calling from Florida but used to live in Michigan. I pictured him working well past his retirement age because he needed the money. I felt bad for him. Now I have a subscription to Sirius Satellite Radio.


likes: 9
comments: 2

207,646 I've been exercising more. For me, any exercise is an improvement over my normally inactive lifestyle of the last 20 years. I've got to say, I feel great. Is this the endorphin effect I here about? Wow, count me in.


likes: 3
comments: 1

207,645 Made a french press coffee. Ground the beans myself. Frothed the milk. Sprinkled cinnamon on top. Perfect. Except instead of using cinnamon, I accidentally used cayenne pepper.


likes: 2
comments: 3

207,644 Just went to email a Facebook Memory to my wife about the time I farted during Yoga at Night, but as I hit the send button, I realized that my newest business associate's email address has supplanted my wife's on auto finisher.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,643 I have come to hate Howie Mandel for all the facial images that he makes when he sees an act on America Lacks Talent as if he was a three year old seeing something for the first time.  "Oooh, they're making the word "Kindness."  


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,642 I watched the Oscars for a few minutes. As soon as the political jabs started I changed the channel. What do they expect? They insulted half of America and then want us to keep watching. Not gonna happen.


likes: 9
comments: 0

207,641 My cousin is selected to be the finalist in a youtube song writing contest. She sent everyone in the family a text saying we should vote for her. I listened to all the finalist and then voted for someone else.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,640 I hate when shoppers in the supermarket block the aisle. Move to the side people!


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,639 I assume any guy with a loud car has a small PP.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,638 When I was a kid there were several times my brother and I peed in our neighbor's well. It's kind of funny but the older I get the more guilt I feel about it.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,637 I'm getting back in the dating scene after an extended absence.  What's the general expectation these days from most women on how they expect a man to be manscaped?  Any and all help is appreciated.


likes: 0
comments: 8

207,636 I spoke to a friend who was organizing a fund-raising dinner for the school. She said her co-organizer was a pain in the ass. She said the woman was bossy as hell and crappy to work with. I didn't know the co-organizer at all. I don't really get involved with community things.

A few days went by. I received an email from the school. They needed a large coffee urn for the dinner. I had one. I emailed the teacher. She said to drop it off at particular address. No problem. I brought it over. A woman came to the door. I had never met her before. We chatted. I told her I know one of the organizers. I explained how I heard the other organizer was described as a pain in the ass, crappy person, annoying....

She thanked me for the coffee urn and said, "By the way, I'm the co-organizer..."

Yea, um, oops.


likes: 5
comments: 4

207,635 It’s awful how much you can love someone, only to realize that love isn’t enough sometimes. She’s perfect in my eyes, I’ve never had chemistry with anyone in my life like I have with her. But the things we don’t see eye to eye on, the fact they’re so prevent and turn perfect days into bad ones, they cast a very dark shadow on it all.

I’ve been in relationships before, I’ve cared for people before, but never have I wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with her. I knew almost right away that she was the Apple to my eye, and once I was able to call her my girlfriend, I felt an overwhelming sense of joy, like I had won the lottery.

I’ve never wanted something to work so bad in my life, but I’m starting to get the feeling it isn’t. Despite the love we have for each other, maybe love isn’t enough…


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,634 I was sitting around today trying to figure out the last time we met in a hotel room and had sex. For the life of me I couldn't tell you if it was 4, 5 or 6 years ago. I guess it is true, time heals all wounds.


likes: 5
comments: 0

207,633 I'm uncircumcised,  but I wish I wasn't. It can be unpleasant and an embarrassment.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,632 I'm on day four of a diet. The doctor said this is my last chance. Either I lose the weight or I die. I've been perfectly on track these last few days, but I'm honestly not sure I can keep it up. Food brings me joy. Life without joy is not a life worth living in my view. I'm thinking I'd rather eat and die quickly, then starve myself and live in despair for another 10 years.


likes: 1
comments: 9

207,631 I hope there are Chinese people in the audience at the Oscars.


likes: 0
comments: 1
flagged

207,630 I was in the supermarket. I smirked at the adult diaper section. Next day out of nowhere I had an accident as I was rushing to the bathroom. It has never happened to me before. God is teaching me a lesson. I'm sorry I smirked.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,629 And this is how it spreads....

A cruise ship in Hong Kong was put in quarantine 4 days ago because 8 passengers tested positive for the virus.

Today all the remaining passengers were allowed to leave the ship.

The incubation period for the virus can be 14 days. So after only 4 days of quarantine, authorities have no way of knowing if any of the passengers are infected. They were let go anyway. Probably too costly to feed them for 14 days. Or too much of a headache to deal with a quarantine. So they ignored the science, they ignore the protocols for quarantine, and probably just set things in motion guaranteeing more innocent people will die.


likes: 0
comments: 2
flagged

207,628 I am a typical over-paid and over-educated office worker. What I'd really like to do is be a chef.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,627 My neighbor posted on facebook how she needs to take a pill every night to fall asleep. Why would anyone post a drug dependency of facebook for all to see? She is confirming what I always believed....... she has a screw loose.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,626 I jacked my husband off this morning. He went from 0 to ejaculation in 5 minutes. Not bad for a 64 year old man. I could see him having sex everyday when he is 90.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,625 I not believe a word the Chinese say about this Coronavirus.  It’s their culture. Say anything, tell any lie, just to save face.  I am certain it is way worse over there than what they ever will admit to.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,624 The Chinese have officially changed the name of the Wuhan Coronavirus to the Novel Corona Virus. They didn't want the negative stigma of having an illness named after their province. I think they are more concerned about image than with saving lives.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,623 In 23 years I've had 11 jobs.  Mostly it's because I'm a contractor and have been bouncing around, a few times because I've had bad bosses and had to leave.  The upside is that each time this has occurred, I've gotten a salary increase.

Adjusted for inflation, in 23 years my salary has increased by a factor of 3.5 times, or 250%.

In 17 years, my wife has had 1 job.  She has a government job and gets the COLA every year.  

Adjusted for inflation, her salary has increased... 0%.

Thankfully, we'll have her retirement plan and the health insurance.  I'm paying for now, she's paying for the future.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,622 It’s way harder to find a sugar daddy in Los Angeles than I thought it would be. Anyone want to help me with my last semester of tuition?  ᖟᶐK


likes: 0
comments: 0
flagged

207,621 I suck 89yr old dck for vacations.


likes: 1

207,620 I'm shocked at how much money my rich friend wastes. He has full time round the clock "assistants" at his call. He gets them to order food for him, do his laundry. I've seen him order them to change the channel on the TV for him. He does zip for himself. He inherited the money so maybe he doesn't care. But I'd put the money to better use.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,619 You yelled at me. You cussed me out. You said every mean thing you can think of.
I stayed calm, I didn’t stoop to your level.
But you didn’t know that I’m crazy too.
So I set the things you left at my house on fire and used your toothbrush to scrub my dirty toilet.
Now we’re even.



likes: 0
comments: 1

207,618 How do I become a Latina? I want the Latina joy for life. And I want the Latina body!


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,617 I feel the urge for my anorexia to return.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,616 My wife's brother has cancer. Whenever my wife gets an update on his deteriorating condition, she attacks me. It takes the form of yelling at me for every little thing, and physically hitting me, and blaming me for everything in her life. I've explained to her that I know it's upsetting, but I am not her punching bag. She needs to be more fair about how she treats me. I didn't cause his cancer. I should not be treated like this is all my fault. She is not listening. She continues to come after me. I am trying to be considerate, but she is blowing it. My view of her is changing in an irreversible way.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,615 Let's get real. If 35,000 people have the virus, there is no way it can be contained. It just takes one of those people to be self centered and walk into a crowded room. This thing is going global.

The best you can hope for is to contain yourself and avoid sick people. Buy a month's worth of food for your family and stay hidden at home. Don't go out anywhere. Don't make an exception for anything.

Forget politics, the elections will be canceled. Forget school, classes will be canceled. This is it people. This is the plague they will talk about for the next 500 years.


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,614 Hmm. Does Donald Trump know that he's a scumbag? Or does he think (astoundingly) that he is right?


likes: 9
comments: 12
flagged

207,613 I have to admit, I was at Costco today. There was an Asian couple in one aisle. As soon as I saw them I turned around and shopped on the other side of the store.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,612 I now take 5 different meds. How did I become that guy?


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,611 I watched a hidden camera clip of a woman getting dressed. It was interesting to see she chose not to put on underwear. This got me thinking, how often do women leave the house without underwear? Curious. Anyone care to answer?


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,610 I'm afraid of everything.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,609 I made lentil curry soup. It turned out great. I offered my wife a taste. She said she couldn't. She explained it would ruin her dinner. I pointed out I only wanted her to taste it. It would be just a little bit on a spoon. And besides, it was noon, dinner wouldn't be for another 6 hours. She was adamant. She wasn't going to taste it. This is who she is. Stubborn and difficult. She didn't want to taste the soup exactly because I was asking her to taste the soup. She will always do the opposite of what I ask because it's a way to be difficult. This is her goal in life, to be difficult. She is a miserable person.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,608 I love stormy weather. I'm all cozy and snug inside while I look out the window at the howling wind and dark clouds. Love it.

I also seem to love stormy relationships. Hmm.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,607 I still have my first paystub from 40 years ago.


likes: 2
comments: 2

207,606 I'm so sick of being alive


likes: 3
comments: 2

207,605 My wife lies to me all the time. She thinks I don't know. I do. I've kept records of her lies. I'm so disappointed in this marriage.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,604 My secret is dumb and self centered LOL...
35f. Divorced a long while now. What am I looking for in a man these days? Well I’m picky but I can be pretty straightforward on here however...

-No Alcohol Abuse Problems
-No Bitchy Teenage or College Aged Daughter.The not bitchy part is most important.
-A job...But not someone who lives to work ...someone who works to live. I don’t need you to support me nor do I want to be told how busy you are every time I call you. All it does is makes me feel very unimportant and it probably is because I was very unimportant.
-I generally positive outlook on life, not a hater of everyone around them. I’m not inclined to make assumptions about everyone especially assumptions that just because I’m pretty I have no problems or I would automatically reject you. I’m so over that self-deprecating crap so many guys need to be cursed with.
-Dad bods are OK, ripped ones  are OK, reasonably not too fat ones are OK, ultra skinny or shorter than me is OK. Different race is OK. Poor hygiene, or so vain that it annoys me even, Not OK. I’m not hung up with looks  just be OK with yourself or fix this shit you’re not OK with without Being a drag about it and bitching all the time while doing nothing.
-fucking listen to me on things concerning my physical boundaries. I don’t like to be licked anywhere on my body and doing so just to get a rise out of me is it funny it is disrespectful and will get you ghosted. I don’t like how hard you’re fucking me, I will say so and I will say how I would prefer to be touched or humpedI don’t make you guess,  or drop hints So if you willfully ignore my Words which leaves no room for interpretation or confusion, Then you’re not good enough for me plain  and simple. If you respond to my request for gentler  touching by half jokingly saying that I am too sensitive in the body or trying to Be bossy, sorry but the problem is not that there something wrong with me it’s simply that You don’t care to even pretend you’re trying to listen and also not good enough for me. My preferences are  not complaints For you to be defensive about or try to silence any way you can.  I really am shocked that many  people have a hard time understanding this Insane concept that we don’t want to finger nails dug in my back does not make me a bitch or a dominant lover. It just makes  me—me, and trying to turn around on me will demonstrate that you’re not OK with me,
-The perfect mate will not try to whip me into shape, get me to finally swear off cigarettes, Or try to get me into a correct daily list of self improvements. I’ve made the self improvements that I felt necessary long before you came along. I have no interest in quitting  smoking, I have no interest in losing 40 pounds especially when I’m not 40 pounds overweight. I can stand to be less messy, and I will work on it if it means a lot to you, I will work on it hard but if you want somebody who is doing any of the other above listed things to themselves  then I suggest you go find them and leave me out of it.
-I love lotta different kinds of music and if something comes on and I put something on my record player or if I suggest then I’m going to buy a ticket to a certain show—And please for the love of God do not emphasize how much you hate that band and how shallow/gay/monotonous whatever band you just learned I like it. It’s just fucking rude and it’s just fucking not something I put up with for Long.
-When I decide to go be a chick and do a little shopping on the weekend to decompress, Do Fucking Not Take that as an invitation to come along looking over  my shoulder the whole time, act impatient,  and bitch at me about spending money on anything I don’t need when I make my own money and I didn’t invite you to begin with. Just be glad that I don’t have more money to blow than I do and that I decompress by shopping rather than fucking  your homey’s. I think that’s fair enough

And the last one is very shallow of me but I really would kind of make a guy the packageProvided he was pretty good about the rest of the above. I want my next serious boyfriend To be packing a thick and uncircumcised cock for me to cum all over when we get it on. Not dogging other people but that’s what drives me nuts and nothing feels better inside me then girth and a uncut head sliding over my clit a few times. If I was not in love with you that just might push me into the zone. Surely I’ll find this fellow one day.



likes: 2
comments: 10

207,603 Today I received the best pension anyone in America could want.

My company sold me my division... a call center; support for products, services, and anything else you'd want for a small to fortune 500 company.   I've been with that company for 26 yrs... this is my severance.

I worked hard, the selling company is now my customer, I proved day in and day out that I'm trustworthy.  And I'm now free to acquire new customers.

I'm thankful, I'm happy, I'm scarred.  Owning a business is not easy, otherwise we'd all do it.

This is the American Dream... show people in power you can make good decisions and have a daily work ethic.   People in power will reward you.

The secret is, I hate my industry... call center support is a hard business.




likes: 4
comments: 4

207,602 I started cheating on my wife 7 years ago.  I couldn't stop.  It was an addiction.  I couldn't understand why I was doing it when I knew it made me feel awful inside.  I hated myself for doing it.

A few weeks ago, I noticed my wife's behavior towards me changed.  She started sitting with me again and just talking to me.  She began to pay more attention to me.

Suddenly, my urge to cheat has almost completely disappeared.

It made me realize how much she's been neglecting me and our marriage for the last 10 years.  In the last decade I haven't been much more to her than the guy who pays her bills.

I realize now that I was neglected and lonely and scared.  I was throwing myself to whatever woman would have me, even for an hour or two.

I don't know what to do.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,601 I'm on a new anti-anxiety med as of today. After taking it I noticed the warning says it can cause sudden death. You kidding me? I will not take it again. But what the heck were the drug makers thinking, an anti-anxiety drug that makes me more anxious than ever.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,600 I wish I was a Stepford wife.


likes: 3

207,599 My two children are both in high school. The bus drops them off each day up the block. They walk  200 yards home, but not together. They walk 20 feet apart. I've spoken to them about it. Couldn't they walk together and I don't know, have a conversation or something? No, they walk apart and act like they hate each other. I'm sure the neighbors notice.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,598 My wife will call to say she wants me to pick up chocolate chip cookies on my way home from work. She tells me what bakery I must go to. She could buy them. She's home alone all day. But she doesn't feel like going out. Then she calls back five minutes later to tell me directions on how I should drive from my office to the bakery. I've lived in this town for over 10 years. It's not very big. There are only about 20 stores, all in the same mini strip mall. But she calls to give me directions. She also tells me to park right in front of the store, but if there are no empty spaces, then I should park in front of the pizza place next door. If that is also full, then I should park in the main part of the parking lot in an empty space. Oh, I should park in an empty space, thanks, I didn't know....


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,597 I feel so alone in my marriage. Shouldn’t it be the opposite? Isn’t that why we couple up? The irony is baffling.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,595 If I hold my pee until I'm about to burst before finally letting go, then for the next 10 minutes I feel a sense of euphoria. It's like the an after-sex glow. Try it.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,594 To be a rascal my hubby fingered me while I was on the phone for a job interview. It was funny at the time but I didn't get the job. Hahaha.


likes: 2
comments: 1

207,593 I've known two people addicted to heroin. As well as acting bizarrely at times, they both had large dark circles under their eyes. There's a woman I work with. She has large dark circles under her eyes. She also acts strangely. My conclusion is she's on heroin. It's a shame. She's beautiful. Or she was.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,592 I'm not trying to be political, just mathematical. I'm watching the results trickle in for Iowa. With 62% of the precincts counted, Buttigieg had the lead at 26.9% of the votes.

Here's how it has progressed:

Precincts .... Votes  

62% ........... 26.9%
71% ........... 26.8%
92% ........... 26.5%


These numbers seem highly improbable to me. Buttigieg's lead has varied by so little even though so many more votes were tallied. The later votes coming from the cities rather than the rural areas. No candidate in any election can be so consistent between rural and city. Yet we are being led to believe it is happening in Iowa. To me the data looks contrived.


likes: 0
comments: 2
flagged

207,591 As I get older I fret every time I can't remember a name or a place or a word. It happened today. I was talking to a workmate about China and I wanted to say "epidemic", but I could only think of "epidermis" and "epi pens". I knew the word was around there somewhere. I didn't want to let on that I couldn't remember, so I said, "lots of people getting sick". It bugs me. I think my mind is starting to fade. My mind is the only thing I have going for me. Without it I'm nothing.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,590 My goal is to do something significant enough that I get my own entry on Wikipedia.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,589 I have tickets to a Chinese dance troupe coming to our area. I'm not sure it is a good idea to go anymore.


likes: 0
comments: 8

207,588 I really like a woman whose husband recently died. All three of us got along really well while he was still alive. Now that he is gone,  it feels inappropriate to ask her out lunch, even on an informal basis. I'm not sure if I should proceed. I feel like I'm betraying our friendship.


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,586 My daughter is the new state champion in an academic competition! She won't post it on her Instagram page. She doesn't want to look like she's bragging. She told me not to post it on FB either. I sit here proud as can be and no one knows. In sports, everyone knows if a kid wins a big award. But in academics, it's more behind the scenes. It's actually ok I suppose. She done good. That's all I need to know. But to be honest, it would be slightly satisfying if people in town found out. But they won't. So a proud parents posts it here as a secret.


likes: 3
comments: 1

207,585


likes: 0
comments: 0
flagged

207,584 My apartment smells like raw sewage. The Super says there must be a break in the sewage line behind the walls. He says they'll try to investigate further next week. I'm sad. I hate living here. How am I suppose to live for the next week in a place that smells like sewage? This should be illegal!


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,583 Well this a problem. Yesterday the head of the Iowa Democratic Party said don't worry, all the paper work for caucus results is secure so nothing can be rigged or corrupted.

But also yesterday, CNN ran a story about one of the people in charge of the paperwork. She inadvertently revealed she was keeping this "secure" paperwork in her car.



Keeping critical paperwork in your car, where anyone could get access to it in the middle of the night, is hardly what I'd call secure.

Here's the CNN story:
https://www.cnn.com/2020/02/03/politics/iowa-voting-issues/index.html


likes: 0
comments: 1
flagged

207,582 I'm usually middle of the road, but what Pelosi did was childish.


likes: 3
comments: 7
flagged

207,581 This sounds trivial, but I was interested in this woman until I found out she lived with her boyfriend in an apartment during college.

Even when I was in college I knew that was a sign of poor judgement.  Even though we were young we all knew that was a lapse in judgement.  That's why so few of us would do that.

The risks were obvious.  Couples break up all the time in college - what happens if the relationship starts going downhill?  It's not just the breakup, it's potentially months of living in a situation where she would be living in close quarters to a guy she didn't get along with anymore.  Plus, she and her boyfriend were in an actual managed apartment complex, not somebody's private home.  She can move out but she's still legally obligated to pay the rent.

It's not like she didn't have the money to get her own place or live with her girlfriends - and she was in a sorority and could have easily found a roommate.  Her parents were very wealthy and already paying for her to go to a Tier 1 school.

And then there's the emotional immaturity that I don't want to deal with.  My older sister lived for a year in college with her boyfriend, and none of us could understand what the rush was.  She was 21 years old and our house was 15 minutes from her boyfriend's place - is she trying to "play adult"?  Yes, people grow up, but it's been two decades and my sister is still flighty and emotional.  

If this woman had been working her own way through college while trying to make ends meet, then sure, I could see why she would live with her boyfriend.  But this woman came from money and could have easily lived with her friends or gotten her own place.  As it stands now, she lives alone in an apartment that is twice as big as her job can afford, so she must be still getting cash from somewhere.

Even though we're a lot older now, I can't find myself being interested in a woman who would have had such a lack of judgement at an age where I (and a heck of a lot of others my age) could easily foresee the risks involved.  It's the same reason why I can never get interested in a woman who ever smoked when she was younger, even if she quit - if she couldn't recognize the obvious risks when they rest of us her age could, then it's just not going to work out.


likes: 0
comments: 9

207,580 I'm thinking about walking across America. East to West. There's something I need to do in California. My friend died. I want to visit his grave. Sure I could fly and go there and back in a few days and be done with it. But our friendship was special. He was special. I feel like I should do more than simply show up, place a cheesy wreath on his grave and be done with it. Walking across the country to get there, now that would be something. It would feel more like the worthy tribute he deserves.

I don't know if it's even possible. I suppose if I carried a pup tent and a sleeping bag and a good coat. I'm not much for creature comfort, so nothing else quite matters to me.

The doctors says I'm out of shape and should do more exercise. He says my blood pressure is too high and I could lose 30 pounds. I also seem to be stuck in a rut. My life lacks direction. I have no goals. Okay, walking to California would qualify as a goal. Two birds one stone. I visit his grave and I use the adventure to turn my life around. Out of his death comes something good.

Plus, I feel like he'd be amused if I did it. He'd get a kick out of it. We did many zany things together. This would fit right in.

You know what, I think I'm gonna do it.


likes: 7
comments: 8

207,579 I slept for 12 hours last night. I think I'm depressed.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,578 A guy I know stopped dying his hair. Now he definitely looks like an old man. But he still looks good. He also looks less vain. All in all I give it a thumbs up.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,577 Doctor said I needed more exercise. With that in mind I went for a walk today. When I came back I treated myself to a bowl of ice cream. Seems fair.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,576 I hate people.
They all suck so much.
What I hate even more than people is that I didn’t realize how awful they all were until AFTER I had kids.
I feel my kids are doomed to suffer this world through the lens that I suffer it through.



likes: 1
comments: 3

207,575 He propositioned me. He was going to get a hotel. He has a girlfriend and I have a boyfriend now. I actually considered it. I said no, though. I’m so glad I said no! I have something amazing that I don’t want to ruin. I love him. The sex with my ex was great, but not worth losing the one I love over. He said he missed the magic we made. I told him I am not lacking in magic. I am so so glad. What’s this, am I growing?


likes: 4
comments: 1

207,574 I hate how physically attracted to you I still am. It never ended. It makes being intimate with my fiance so difficult. I used sex with you to try and fulfill what I was missing from you emotionally, and now I am doing the opposite with him.
I keep thinking that if I could feel you again maybe i could be done with it and move beyond it, but I know that isn't how it works.


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,573 I think the Electro Magnetic Pulse thing isn't real. It's used as a plot device in movies, but even knowing what little I do of sceince, there's no way you can stop electricity from flowing. That's silly.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,572 I think Rush Limbaugh is being taken out by the Deep State. A non-obvious assassination.


likes: 4
comments: 6

207,571 We had a nice day. I took care of many details that were lingering. Motor vehicle insurance issues for her car, I paid her outstanding parking ticket, I sorted out some pharmacy stuff for her. I fixed a flat on her bike. All seemed well. She was in a good mood.

After dinner, out of nowhere, she turned mean. She demanded I buy her a dog? What? This is the first I heard of it. A dog? She doesn't like dogs. But she demanded one and said I'm cheap for not getting her one. She stomped upstairs and went to bed. And just like that the day was tainted.

It's a light switch with her. Things are perfectly good and then click, things are terrible.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,570 You fucking kidding me? The Dem caucus results are being delayed for "quality control checks"? Meaning what, the results are rigged?

We are like a fucking third world country.


likes: 0
comments: 13
flagged

207,569 I MIGHT be closet addicted to social media and I hate it.


likes: 1
comments: 6

207,568 My wife is making calls for the Warren campaign. I'm keeping this a secret.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,567 Whenever a Dem acts up and spews out more fake news, tell him he's a piece of Schiff.


likes: 2
comments: 1
flagged

207,566 I always keep peanut butter in the pantry.  I eat a pbj sandwich now and again to remind me of my youth when I was just getting started and my choice was pay the rent or eat.  Keeps me humble and when I want to buy something I don't need, I think about the PB.  I still like the taste though.  Crunchy!
All you younger people out there struggling, we have all been there.  Hang in there, things do get better.  


likes: 3
comments: 6

207,565 When I was 14 I peed in my pants. I had no choice. I was in a situation where nothing else could be done. I was on a sailboat in the middle of a big race. It was blowing about 25 knots. There was no opportunity to stand up and pee off the side. It embarrassed me back then. Strange thing though, 29 years have passed. It embarrasses more now. The memory pops into my head and I audibly gasp. So odd. Why does it bother me more now? I have no contact with any of those people on the boat. It's not like they are laughing at me today. I doubt anyone remembers a thing about it. But it still bothers me big time.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,564 There is already talk about impeaching Trump again because this first time failed.


likes: 2
comments: 2
flagged

207,563 I had leftover spaghetti for breakfast.


likes: 2
comments: 5

207,562 I want to have sex with him but I'm tired of being the one to start it.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,561 I had the ring. Our trip was only four weeks away. Why did you do this? Why did I have to walk into the bathroom and see you with someone else? ten years down the drain for your drunken fun. That you claim I should just forgive you for because you don’t remember. That’s not the type of wife I want. Where do I go from here? I’m lost.


likes: 1
comments: 6

207,560 My boyfriend (at the time) said he was thinking of killing himself. I told him not to do it. Do you know his response? He suggested I should do it with him. This is the most outrageous thing anyone has ever said to me. I should kill myself to keep him company. What an incredibly selfish thing to say. I knew the man for three months yet I should go with him to the grave. It made me so mad that I left and never spoke to him again. I didn't care at that point if he killed himself or not. (He didn't kill himself.) But it didn't matter anymore. I was done with him. Goodbye Charlie.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,559 Three more people in California are sick with the virus. God has spoken.


likes: 3
comments: 5

207,558 I think my depression is taking over. The memories. The past and knowing I could have had a better life. I wouldn’t be living this life. I took the path I shouldn’t have and now all I have been doing is looking back and wondering why.  

Why did I allow myself to let others determine my worth and self being. Even as I am older, I ended up fling jobs where people treat me with disrespect and it feels like my voice Is never heard.

Why did l let my gifts be overridden for acceptance of those around me?  Why did I give my own self to attain the approval from those around me?  Do I have enough time to allow my gifts to be retrieved and grown again? Will I have enough willpower to wait and to be patient through the process?  

I am sitting alone pondering all of these things. My mind is no longer on money, it’s focused on how to be truly happy. An emotion I don’t know if will be able to truly attain. Will I be able to find my love of my life?  Will I be able to be successful in my job!  Will I be able to continue taking steps that lead me back to my past and allow me to relive the scenarios of all of my life?  why?

If only I could turn back time.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,557 Fuck you KP


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,556 My daughter just told me she has a lot of anger and resentment towards me.  I love her dearly. She's s bitch though.  If she wasn't mine I wouldn't even like her

.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,555 I hated the halftime show.


likes: 2
comments: 12

207,554 My shower is moldy. I feel like I'm living in a welfare hotel instead of a luxury high rise.


likes: 1
comments: 5

207,553 I have no idea who is in the super bowl.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,552 I like Bernie. His stance on healthcare is brilliant. There will be just doctors and patients. No middle man insurance companies. Rich and poor, they all get the same health coverage for free. If we truly are civilized, this is what we'd implement.


likes: 2
comments: 9

207,551 I did magic mushrooms last spring and ended up coming off my bipolar & dep/anxiety meds & feel like I don't need the meds anymore and feel better than ever.

At first being on the meds & the mushrooms my mind felt like it was going crazy. Until I dropped the meds.

All this chatter about whether they help, I am an avid believer that they do. I just can't say that to people, it's illegal and all.


likes: 2
comments: 3

207,550 I live in a major US city. Been here five years now, and I’m very unhappy here. This place is DEEPLY shitty, DEEPLY steeped in a culture of disrespect and DEEPLY unconcerned about the homeless, constantly using brute force and hostile architecture to make it clear that their lives don’t matter.  The men here are without honor and without conscience.  The state I live in is known for a number of BRUTAL high profile killings and mass murders.  I am constantly being lied to and led on pointless wastes of my time and energy.  I get threatened by strangers sometimes, and I don’t know who they are but they know me it seems.  I’ve come VERY close to losing every last thing I’ve ever worked to earn and come VERY VERY CLOSE TO BEING COMPLETELY DISPLACED. I’ve been raped here and nothing was done about it. Nothing. My name has been devalued and I will never be where I previously was. This place has made me a second class citizen and I don’t feel safe here in any way. Something very bad hangs in the air and it wants my souls among others. Every relationship that I’ve been in here has left me with a nasty and mean spirited ex to deal with. This city is garbage, it is evil, and I’d be most thrilled to watch it burn to the ground, down to the last molecule. Fuck this place and everyone who says it’s awesome. Y’all are the reason people move here and lose their dignity and their security and their WORTH. Anyone want to guess where I have the incredible misfortune of being stuck?


likes: 2
comments: 16

207,549 There's a typo in my father's obit. I hate my sister.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,548 I like it when 7-year old James is here and plays with my kid.  It's not very often.  He's the cousin of the kid who lives next door.  All the boys will play in the front yard.  When it's time for James to go she'll come over into the house and we'll talk.  His mom is Chinese and it's obvious that she wants to be around me and doesn't want to go.  Chinese women show interest in a certain way.  It's subtle, she lingers and stays close and makes a lot of eye contact.  One of these days I hope she suggests that I throw her on the bed and fuck the shit out of her.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,547 Plenty of discussion / expectations / wishful thinking about women taking it up the ass, and honestly it is true for me. I've allowed guys to have their way back there. No regrets by me in the slightest. But something which never seems to come up, I'd say half the men I've been with like when I stick my finger up their ass. Or my vibrator. Or a some other phallic looking object. I'll bet guys are eager to tell their drinking buds about doing a woman in the ass, but they never tell each other about letting the woman insert something up the guy's ass.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,546 a man I was intimate with stalked me for years.
I liked it.
It didn’t bother me at all.
The phone call? The one where no one would speak, but I knew it was him? I felt at ease.
The car that passed my house all those times? Him.
The photographs left on my doorstep years later after I moved in with my husband? Loved them.
Keep it coming, I love you always. Secreto.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,545 I am not sure others have seen/noticed this but it irks me.
People who want or need connection who meet a new person, think oh, there’s a mutual interest and we have some stuff in common: internal monologue “we can maybe become friends?”
Person makes attempt at friendship, other person gives information for business/something they can buy.
Person interested in friendship purchases product. Friendship never really transpires, but money was made & services were rendered.
This is what happens when a society replaces community with capitalism and consumerism.
You’re seen as a resource, not a human being with intense needs to feel included and loved.
It’s so sad to me.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,544 Another case of the virus in the USA. This time in New York City. I don't get it. Every country is on alert to stop the virus, yet every day in the news I hear essentially the same story. A plane from China lands at the airport and one of the passengers is sick and test positive for the disease. Like WTF? Why are we still allowing planes from China to send sick people here. That's idiotic and so preventable. Stop all the planes already.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,543 I'm a great catch. I'm tall and good looking. I'm funny and charming and successful. I know how to woo a woman. After the 2nd date she's head over heels for me. She tells her friends she's found Mr. Right. She calls her Mom to say I'm the one. Then we have sex. Then I never call her again. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm a bastard, that much is clear. But digging deeper, sex does something to me. I feel depressed afterwards. I feel slimy, weak and worthless. I have these feelings of guilt that overwhelm me. I don't deal with it well at all. I want to be alone for the next few weeks. I definitely don't want to see the woman again and dredge up the memory. As a consequence I never call her again. I never pickup when she calls. I become invisible. She eventually gives up and never understands what went wrong. Digging down further, and I've never told anyone this before, I think it has to do with my older brother. He did things to me right up until I was 15 or so. You might tell me it wasn't my fault. But that's not true. He did things to me so I did things to my younger sister. I am at fault. I never want to think about it. I bury it. I'm good at burying it. Until I have sex with a woman and then I'm reminded of my youth and all I want to do is run and hide.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,542 I get worried when I see a fat middle age man going for a jog. He very well could have a heart attack.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,541 Beats headphones suck. For me, definitely not worth the money. How hard is it to make headphones where both ears work? Isn't that the point?


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,540 I ran into an old acquaintance. He's the father of a girl who was friends with my daughter while they were together in high school. I asked how his daughter was doing. He said she's still on track to become a Spanish teacher. This was something she spoke about all through high school, her wish to become a high school Spanish teacher. To that end, he told me she's going to spend next semester in Spain as part of a total immersion course for would-be teachers.

When I got home, I mentioned to my wife how I bumped into the father. I relayed what he said, that his daughter is still on track to become a Spanish teacher.

My wife said, "You don't know that."

I said, "I don't understand. Her father said she's still pursuing the idea of become a Spanish teacher."

She said again, "You don't know that."

"Why don't I know it? Her father just told me."

My wife said, "Maybe she'll use her Spanish to become an ambassador to Spain."

"Well, she's not actually studying diplomacy or foreign policy or anything. She's studying to become a Spanish teacher."

"You don't know that."

"Why do you keep saying it over and over. I'm just telling you what her father told me. She's studying to become a Spanish teacher."

"He doesn't know that."

"What? He's her father. He's paying the college bill. He says she's studying to become a teacher. Wouldn't he know better than anyone?"

My wife responded with, "No. Why would he know?"

"He's her father and - "  I cut myself off. What was I thinking. I forgot I was talking to the world's most difficult wife. She'll make an argument out of anything. This conversation should have been so simple. I say I ran into the girl's father and his daughter is going to become a Spanish teacher. A normal wife would say oh that's nice.

But not my wife. She has to argue the point even though there is nothing to argue.

This is my life with my wife. It's amazingly tedious and painful.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,539 He took a bite but didn't stay for the meal. Ya know what I mean...


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,538 In the last 10 years we've seen SARS, MERS, ebola and now Wuhan. What's going on? So many deadly diseases. It makes me wonder if they are man made and are intentionally being spread to pare down the population.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,537 About 10 years ago my brother in law lent me an old portable generator during a power outage. He had a new one. The one he lent me wasn't being used anymore. Over the years I repaired it a few times and kept it running. Last year I moved. As part of the move we had a garage sale. I didn't think about it but I sold the generator. I got $200 for it which was pretty good for an old machine. This week my brother in law called and said he wants his old generator back. Fuck.


likes: 0
comments: 9

207,536 I will never ask for it but I like when a man puts it in the backdoor.


likes: 5
comments: 2

207,535 Testimony coming out today in the Harvey Weinstein trial. Sorry, but when I think of rape, I think of a dark alleyway and a knife and a masked stranger.

The testimony today from a "victim" described an ongoing relationship where after the alleged rape incidents spanning both LA and NY she sent Weinstein flattering emails. They continued their friendship for years, exchanging over 400 emails. Not once in all that time did she ever accuse him of a sexual attack.

Weinstein's lawyers asked directly, "You wanted to benefit from the power he had, whether it was professional or otherwise. Correct?"

"I wanted to benefit from my agents and managers, but they weren’t giving me opportunities," she said.

Wow, I take that as a yes. Her agents weren't giving her roles, so she turned to Weinstein. Meaning yes they were having sex, but she was doing it consensually with the hope of being cast in a movie.

She went on to describe their relationship as friendly and even loving.

Come on. Where is the rape?


likes: 1
comments: 9
flagged

207,534 Recently I've been considering the question as to whether or not I'm mentally ill. I mean how would I know? From what I read it appears that mentally ill people don't realize that what they are doing is out of the normal boundaries. They think everyone else has issues, but not themselves. Can I be one of these people?

Some of the quirky things I do:

* I count things. My steps mostly. If I walk to the post office, I can tell you exactly how many steps I took to get there.

* I try to find meaning in things which are not there. If the car ahead of me has the digits 545 in the license plate, I consider it is a cryptic message and I'm determined to find out what the driver was getting at. Hmm, 545 is 16 squared plus 17 squared. It brings to mind the Sound Of Music song "I Am 16 Going On 17." The driver might be a member of the Von Trapp family. I speed up a little and look at the driver. She's Chinese. She sees me looking at her. I give her my best smile and start mouthing the words,

"Totally unprepared am I
To face a world of men
Timid and shy and scared am I
Of things beyond my ken..."

She speeds up to get away from me. She's probably not a Von Trapp.

* I anagram names. I'll meet a girl named is Kristin Miller. I'll mention her name anagrams to "Sir Mint Killer". I'll ask if there is something I should know about her, has she been offing the herbs in the garden? Some girls find this amusing. Most don't though.

* More crazy. I worry the car in the oncoming lane will swerve into me on purpose because she's having a fight with her boyfriend. He cheated on her at a work related holiday party. She found some incriminating text messages on his phone. She confronted him and then went storming out of the house and is on a mission kill herself in a traffic accident. I reason all this out and as her car draws near, I put on my warmest smile and try to make sincere eye contact with her to let her I know I understand what happened and she can expect my full support so therefore she shouldn't hit me head on and kill me.

* I follow people sometimes. I'll see a woman at the mall. She looks warm, like my third grade teacher. I can picture us being friends. In my mind I can see us eating Chinese food together where we share the plates and it's not a problem about germs or anything because we are friends and friends don't worry about each other's germs so yeah we can share the plates. So I follow her around the mall for an hour. I go into the stores she goes in. I keep my distance though, like I don't get any closer than 5 feet. Especially if she goes into Victoria Secrets. I'm waiting for the right moment to approach her and mention how we might be friends but I worry about getting tongue tied at the last second and as an opening volley saying something dumb to her like "Hi, I've been following you around for the last hour but don't worry, I didn't get really close in Victoria Secrets. I watched you choose your new panties from a distance." That would be bad. I know that. Which gives me hope I might actually be more sane than I sound.

Please tell me. Insane or just quirky?


likes: 0
comments: 13

207,533 I know a woman who says she's color blind. I think she's faking it. She wants the attention of having this weird issue.


likes: 0
comments: 17

207,532 Personally, I think the world needs a good pandemic, one that wipes out a large % of the population.


likes: 4
comments: 8

207,531 I know what your attitude is right now. It's trying to find some way to get even or upset me because I dumped you.  

But did you ever realize that if you hadn't lied to me that week, you might not have gotten dumped? Take some responsibility instead of blaming others! What you do really doesn't matter to me. I notice, yes, but I don't care because I now know you never did.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,530 I wanted to cheat. But couldn’t get myself to do it.


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,529 So I recently found out my spouse is having an affair: it’s been ongoing for a long time. If I’m being truly honest with myself, I think they deserve Each other and hopefully they run off into the sunset together.  That way, I’ll be left with what I really want in life, my kids and to stop walking on egg shells.  It won’t last long anyway, once a cheater always a cheater.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,528 According to their answering machine message, the staff at my doctors office goes to lunch between 11:30 and 1:30. I can't get through to them at these times because they are out eating. But one time I had an appointed at 11:15. It was for a full checkup. We were done at 12:15. As I was leaving past the front desk I noticed the same half dozen employees were still there, like the nurses, the receptionist, the billing people. I said I thought they would be out to lunch. They said they never go out to lunch. I pointed out that their answering machine says they are out to lunch between 11:30 and 1:30. They said that never happens. They are always in the office and they eat at their desks. They said they don't feel like answering the phones and dealing with patients, so they give themselves a two hour break everyday.

This seems so wrong to me. I'm going to a doctor who doesn't want to see patients? There have been times my son is sick and I eagerly want to talk to the doctor but they were "out to lunch" so they couldn't pick up the phone, even though they were there. I suddenly viewed the doctor as so uncaring. I dropped him and found a new place where they actually want to help sick people. Sounds so weird to say, but yes I want a doctor who wants to help sick people. Maybe in med school they should start teaching doctors to be better people.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,527 I'm not sure why I cheated on him. He's my everything. The new guy was just a guy I hardly know. It's like I wanted to cheat so I could mark it off my to do list. I won't be doing it again.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,526 PSA: If you are pleased with how sparkling your cleaning lady has left your home, please tip!


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,525 She calls me daddy. She tells me she has an IUD. I pray she is being truthful because I cum inside of her [and on her tits] multiple times a week.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,524 Today in Chicago I saw a woman wearing a surgical mask. And so it begins.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,523 Wonder if I'll ever listen to myself.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,522 You ever come after me again, you are going down. You say one nasty thing, I'm coming after you.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,521 Okay. I know this woman. She's a suburban mom. I like her. She's bubbly and fun. But the other day she posted a story online about how she had to meet some women for coffee. Just then her son needed a ride. Okay, she better rush. She drove her son and then was late for the meeting so she rushed over to the coffee shop...... even though she was still in her very short bathrobe. She figured it would be okay because they were friends. Of course, all the other customers in the coffee shop weren't friends, but  I'm sure they enjoyed the show.

It makes me laugh. I wish I had that kind of chutzpa, to be so comfortable in yourself that you can go out in public wearing nothing more than a short bathrobe. She rocks.


likes: 2
comments: 2

207,519 A woman called the police on me because she said I looked at her Facebook page. She posted the details online. I never heard from the police though. LOL, could you imagine if it was illegal to look at a page on Facebook? One billion users would be arrested! But it goes to my theory that the internet is filled with self entitled idiots who lie and bully to cause big drama.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,518 I dance around my apartment when I'm alone.


likes: 1
comments: 5

207,517 I had a chance to work for the CIA. I turned it down.


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,516 I just did my taxes.  At first I owed $4,000.  I was sick to my stomach.  Thankfully, I did some work as an independent contractor.  They let you deduct everything.  I started making up expenses.  $2000 became $4000.  Now I’m getting $10,000 back.  The program then did a check for the chances I would be audited - almost no chance of being audited.  No red flags.  Made me realize that everybody does this.


likes: 1
comments: 6

207,515 I have never seen anything interesting on tiktok.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,514 My wife says the dumbest things. I am sitting at the kitchen table. She comes in with the mail. She hands me a letter from Motor Vehicles. I open it in front of her. It's a warning notice. I read it out loud. It says our car is no longer registered because they say it is not insured. They go on to say that if there is an error, and the car is insured, I need to get the insurance company to generate a letter and I must bring the letter to Motor Vehicles to show them in person. I sigh. I say to my wife, "Our car is insured. Someone messed up." My wife says, "Well have you contacted the insurance company yet? Are they sending a letter? Did you go to Motor Vehicles and show them?"

Confused, I say to her, "When do you think I might have contacted the insurance company and then brought the letter to Motor Vehicles? I just opened this warning notice 30 seconds ago. You have been with me the whole time. In the past 30 seconds did you see me contacting the insurance company or heading over to Motor Vehicles?"

"Well I thought maybe you did it really quickly."

I don't know what to do with her anymore.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,513 Why do men unbutton their shirts so we can see their chest hair? Chest hair is not an attractive feature. It's gross. Guys, go the opposite way, button your shirts so we can't see your chest hair.


likes: 2
comments: 11

207,512 Normally I do all my reading directly on the computer screen. News outlets, wikipedia, etc. But sometimes I'll read something directly from an actual hard cover book. Then when I need to know what time it is, I look at the bottom right corner of paper page and get momentarily confused as to why the time isn't there.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,511 You beat me up bloody on the inside.
I will not recover.
Just need the kids to speak for themselves before I leave this world because it is the only way I can leave you.

Not all abuse is physical.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,510 I started gettings lots of ads about bad breath. This makes me mad and paranoid. Am I being specifically targeted? I know they computer can't tell directly but I'm thinking maybe someone who works here googled that her boss has bad breath or something like that and the google servers figured out I'm her boss. Too much invasion going on in our world. Leave me alone.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,509 One girl scout troop leader blocking another troop leader from seeing her posts on Facebook. Ya just gotta laugh. These are the leaders? Imagine the message they are sending to the girls.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,508 I am convinced a program to capture our every key stroke has been embedded into every browser so they can track what we type online. This has been used to judge your interests and send you targeted ads. But it is also being used to judge who you are as person and gather info to be used against you later if you get in the way.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,507 When I leave a poop smear in the toilet bowl at work, I wad up some toilet paper and rub it away. Yes, I am putting my hand into a public toilet bowl. To me this is better than my coworkers seeing my poop residue. Not everyone at work takes my approach. Plenty of times I have seen poop smears in the toilet. I hate it. I'm grossed out by it. By working in this office I didn't agree to view your poop. Clean it the fuck up!


likes: 2
comments: 3

207,506 I feel like my doorman judges me.


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,505 I'm thinking about stocking up on food and then staying at home for the next month. I'll let the virus burn itself out.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,504 Somehow I manage to prove over and over again that no one likes me.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,503 The world's worst person (IMO) has been kicked off Facebook. I love it. She bullies people who disagree with her. Nasty as can be. I learned to just stay away. She's not from here. She's trailer trash in an otherwise lovely town. Just goes to show you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl. But in any event, she's finally been booted from Facebook. Thank you Mark Zuckerberg.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,502 I’m arbitrarily locked out of PayPal.  Also not receiving a paycheck till Friday although Wednesday is always payday. I live in a hotel and rents due TODAY. I don’t know what the hell im gonna do about this. I have too much stuff to move out right now. I have a cat. What if they bring the police? I’m utterly panicked right now and at a loss for a solution.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,501 Big gay ice cream is the best.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,500 Old people make me sad. I don't say this in a cruel way, but it might be better if they died before losing all their dignity.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,499 LOL. People think the Wuhan Corona virus has something to do with Corona Beer. Searches are way up for the phrase "Corona Beer Virus".

See what I mean about millennials? :)


likes: 0
comments: 8

207,498 I vividly remember going on my first professional job interview while in college. I wore white pants, and a white shirt. I thought it was important to match. So I also wore white gym socks. No belt. The icing on the cake, I wore sandals because I didn't own shoes. It was either that or sneakers. I looked like a hippie version of the Good Humor man. It was ridiculous and cringeworthy, but I didn't know any better. I was completely on my own at that point, my parents were no longer in the picture. I never got the job offer.

Today my son is going on his first job interview. He graduates college in June. I took him clothes shopping over the weekend. I got him a proper suit and black leather shoes and belt. He looks like a winner. He didn't understand why I was going to all this effort for him. I didn't feel like explaining how I used to be a fashion don't.


likes: 3
comments: 7

207,497 Ew. There's a house for sale. It's very fancy and is selling for more than $1 million. It is being featured online. But nowhere in the ads does it mention the previous owner killed herself in the master bedroom. Isn't there a law about telling potential buyers any sordid history? Anything for money right....


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,496 My wife gets her nails done once a week. At $65 a pop plus tip I think this is extravagant. But I'm asking, is this normal to get your nails done once a week. Or do most women do it less frequently.


likes: 1
comments: 15

207,495 Health officials in Washington state are looking for 16 individuals who came in contact with a Wuhan virus patient. This gives me shudders. A sick person was walking around and possibly infecting others? Now they are scrambling to find those others. It seems like there were no guidelines in place. To me the quarantine situation appears totally mismanaged. If this thing spreads in Washington, they have no one to blame but themselves.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,494 My bf doesn't know how to hold a fork properly. He eats like a caveman. I think he was raised by wolves.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,493 I live in San Fran. Builders need to invent apartments that are 6 feet by 10 feet. Enough room for a bed, a microwave, a sink and a toilet. The rent should be like $100 a month. The entire building of apartments would be rented out within a day.


likes: 3
comments: 9

207,492 I read something very disturbing about this Chinese virus. Chinese scientists were able to isolate and grow the virus in a laboratory setting. This is the crucial first step for creating a vaccine.

But get this, the Chinese government is refusing to give samples of the virus to labs in other nations. How fucked up is that? Other nations have sick patients, but the Chinese won't budge.

Luckily Australia has now also been able to make a lab version of the virus and is freely giving it to other nations.

Thank you Australia. Fuck you China.


likes: 6
comments: 8

207,491 My wife just a few years younger than me enjoys going out during the work week and not communicating with me about when she’ll be home.. I’ll get a vauge Tex “hey, I’m not sure when I’ll be home tonight.. hope you enjoy _____!” As if that’s appropriate or acceptable.

It’s random. And she knows I expect her home by a certain time, so when I inquire or push her, she’ll choose to ignore me. What a cunt you turned out to be, so utterlh disrespectful and selfish, always playing victim.

Maybe I should let you divorce me. I had no clue who you really were.. but now I see you haven’t been ready to grow up, and likely won’t be for a long time at the age of 25. Maybe you shouldn’t have pushed me so had to get married.

At times like this I wish I didn’t ask.
M/28 - married to a ‘hot blond’ whose self-centered and disrespectful. A c*nt


likes: 0
comments: 11

207,489 If I buy a product from China, and someone in the factory where it was made has the virus, could the virus be transferred to me?


likes: 0
comments: 11

207,488 So I didnt have to break up with you, you broke up with me. I couldnt be more pleased and free. This is great.


likes: 2
comments: 1

207,486 I no longer tell people my wife died. I tell them we are no longer together. It's easier.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,485 I wish I had cancer. Then they would let me rest.


likes: 2
comments: 4

207,484 I think as a society we still need to sort out what free speech means. Some trolls who said Sandy Hook was fake have been arrested. I'm not a conspiracy nut. I know Sandy Hook was real. But you know what, trolls are allowed to say what they want. We can't go arresting people because they offend us.


likes: 2
comments: 1

207,483 I have a spreadsheet for all my various fake IDs on all the social media platforms. I currently have 27 different personas.


likes: 1
comments: 8

207,482 About 20 years ago, I moved to America and became a citizen 10 years in.

My secret is that I will be renouncing my American citizenship and moving to Mexico in a few months. Without a single regret.




likes: 1
comments: 9

207,481 I don't care that Kobe Bryant died.  I mean, I'm sorry that he died - he seemed like a real nice guy.  But I was never into basketball, so I don't really care that much.  Also, what about the other people that died - no one seems to care that much about them.  


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,480 If Bolton has such damning info about Trump, why didn't he bring it up during the House proceedings? Why is it only coming up now? Did he wake up last week with no place to go, because Trump fired him, and then he suddenly remembered the damning info? Makes me wonder.


likes: 1
comments: 8
flagged

207,479 Whenever I think of the “bullets” I dodged before meeting my husband;

It reminds me that somewhere out there; there might be a wildly happy, fulfilled, emotionally supported woman out there very glad that she dodged my “bullet”.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,477 I received a call saying if I don't cooperate with the IRS by sending them an instant money transfer, I will be arrested within 45 minutes.

Oh okay.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,476 It's time.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,475 My wife went in for a routine colonoscopy when she turned 45. The place was a large room with a nurses station in the middle and three beds around the sides shielded by curtains. It was like a factory. The doc could perform the colonoscopy on the patient in one bed while the patient in the next bed was waiting for the general anesthesia to kick in. Meanwhile, the patient in the third bed was regaining consciousness having already finished the procedure.

I was allowed to bring my wife into the room and help get her settled. But as soon as they were ready to administer the general anesthesia, I was asked to leave.

They called me back in about 20 minutes later as she was coming to. That's when I noticed. The curtains around the bed areas weren't pulled closed very well. I could see a woman at the next bed getting naked. I could also see the another husband looking at my groggy naked wife as she attempted to get herself dressed. I have to admit it was pretty sexy.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,474 The outpouring of grief for Kobe Bryant is ridiculous. Has everyone forgotten about that whole rape thing? Or does it only bother me because I have daughters?


likes: 2
comments: 17

207,473 I shouldn't be married but I'm too lazy to do anything about it.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,472 There is now evidence that bras cause breast cancer. They limit drainage and weaken the chest muscles. A lightbulb moment. Breast cancer rates have been going up for decades. Yes yes yes, the intense societal need to wear a bra is backfiring. Women should not wear a bra.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,471 Remember all those kooky stories about Howard Hughes. He was a recluse. He wouldn't touch anyone. He didn't bathe. He hitchhiked through the desert looking like a homeless man....

Well now I'm looking at Jeff Bezos and I'm thinking deja vu.

He took nude photos of himself and sent them to a girlfriend. There were various escalating claims that his phone was hacked by a newspaper, no by the Republicans, no by a Saudi prince....

You know what I'm saying? The guy is kinda out there. I think we might be looking at Howard Hughes version 2.0


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,470 I had a strange dream about getting having gay sex with an Indian man. WTF? I'm a straight married man. I shouldn't admit this part but I woke up with a hard on.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,469 I bought a pound of sliced turkey. It's been sitting in the fridge for the past week. I turned to my wife said, "We should eat turkey for lunch today before it goes bad."

She then said, "I just ate the turkey and finished it."

I was surprised. I had seen the turkey package just 20 minutes earlier. How could she have eaten an entire pound of sliced turkey?

But this is my wife. She is as difficult as can be and she is terrible with conversation. She never thinks about what she says. So I asked, "When exactly did you eat the turkey?"

"I told you, I told you! I said I just ate the turkey. You need to listen more."

I responded, "But what does 'just' mean? Does it mean in the last 20 minutes. Or does it mean a month ago?"

"You know exactly what it means!"

"No I don't." I gave her an example, "I just saw you mother at Christmas. In this case 'just' means a month ago. Or I can say I just sipped my coffee, in which case 'just' means a minute ago. So when you say you 'just' ate the turkey, do you mean a month ago or a minute ago?"

She screamed, "You know what it means!!!"

"Please, just answer my question. When did you eat the turkey? How many minutes ago? I'm trying to understand if I need to make turkey sandwiches for lunch today. Please, stop being difficult. You know what I'm asking. Please answer."

"I'm not eating turkey for lunch today because I just had some."

I see my error. It's the same error I always make. I was trying to have an adult conversation with the world's most difficult person. I got out of my seat. I opened the fridge and looked for the turkey. There it was. Untouched. She did not just eat it.

I said as much. "The turkey is still in the fridge unopened. So you didn't just eat it."

I think she felt busted at that point, so she said, "Well I finished a package of turkey a month ago. You should have know that's what I meant."

I thought back. I haven't purchased turkey since long before Thanksgiving, many months ago. I told her this.

Busted again, she needed a way out. So she said, "I never said I ate turkey. I ate the ham a month ago. Why are you suddenly trying to make this about turkey? Why do you lie when you are losing an argument?"

Sigh. I get mentally exhausted trying to deal with her. I took a deep breath and went back to my original point. "Perhaps for lunch today you could have a turkey sandwich."

"No way. I'm going out to lunch with my friends."

Meaning this entire conversation was pointless.

I calmly asked, "Do you think you are a difficult person?" She left the room without answering. Maybe that's for the best.


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,468 Here's a perfect example of what's happened to journalism:



So which is it? Were 13 of the 41 cases LINKED to the market? Or were 13 of the 41 cases NOT LINKED to the market?

This is also why I skip over all news stories about politics. If the press can't get a simple count right about the Wuhan virus, then who knows what else they are getting wrong everywhere else.

Here is the Yahoo Wuhan story:

https://www.yahoo.com/news/report-indicates-deadly-chinese-coronavirus-155635402.html



likes: 0
comments: 9

207,467 Kobe Bryant went to my high school. We were different years. I knew him a little bit, enough to say hi in the hallway. It was my one claim to fame. Now he is gone.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,466 I am not interested in sex anymore with my husband. I'm not sure if I'm interested in sex with other men. I might be. In the next few weeks as I interact with men I'm going to envision having sex with them to see if it feels right. First up, I have a dentist appointment later this week. Little does he know what I'll be thinking as he puts his hands in my mouth.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,465 I haven't left the house in about two months. It might be longer. There is no reason to leave. I'm cozy in my home. It's warm and cheerful. I buy anything I need on Amazon. I get groceries delivered. Or I get take out. I watch the news. It lets me know what's going on in the world. I see no reason to change my way of life. In fact I think as time goes by more and more people will start living the way I am.


likes: 3
comments: 5

207,464 I have to break up with you bc you dont talk to me, I need communication. A friend. Someone who enjoys my company, dang...

f/32


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,463 My wife will sometimes make the bed. But not to be helpful. She does it so she can be mad that I didn't do it.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,462 Wow what a dream I had today. Felt so real.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,461 My former boss is easily 300 pounds and 72 years old. How can he still be alive. Modern medicine is great. But sometimes it's not. This fucker should die already.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,460 I only do the laundry when I'm completely out of clothes. I mean like my drawers are empty and I've taken things out of the hamper several more times.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,459 I wonder what cooked human flesh tastes like.


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,458 We need to shut down the border with China. Do it now before it's too late.


likes: 1
comments: 3

207,457 It's just not the same with you gone :((( I hope you do reach out to me.


likes: 0
comments: 7

207,456 My mom is 50. My stepdad is 46. I’m 32. Whenever I’m over he flirts with me. He’s really hot. Especially for an older man. I’m afraid that if he actually put the moves on me I’d fuck him. His callused hands could do some things to me.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,454 This is what it's like being married to my wife. She calls me at work and says I have to come home early. Why? Her friend's dog was turning two years old. My wife was going to the doggy birthday party in the middle of the afternoon. My wife bought the dog a present and made a card. My wife insisted I must come home early so I can sign the birthday card. I light heartedly suggested she could sign my name because the dog probably doesn't know my hand writing. My wife sternly said no, I must sign. I continued to be light hearted and pointed out that he is only turning two so he couldn't read yet, therefore he wouldn't be able to make out my name on the card anyway. My wife flipped out. She screamed that I had to come home and sign the card. She called me a stubborn jackass and said there would be consequences in our marriage. I said look, I'm not leaving work to come home to sign a silly dog birthday card. I said it is not right that she gets so mad and threatens me. For her to be outraged because I'm being a responsible adult is completely the wrong thing for her to do. I do not deserve her wrath because I'm doing the right thing and working to pay the bills while she goes to a frivolous party. She slammed down the phone and didn't speak with me for a few days. I married the world's most difficult woman.


likes: 0
comments: 11

207,453 I was young and I had a bit of a crush on Kim. Maybe I tried too hard, I don't know. One day I called Kim and she told me I was annoying. She told me I was embarrassing to be around and that I didn't dress right. Finally, she told me to leave her alone and go away.

I didn't think I deserved to be treated like that. I told her, "I'm sorry that I annoy you so much. I'll talk to you later, if ever again. Goodbye." And I did just that, never spoke with her again. Saw her once afterwards, but just walked right by her and ignored her.

I was naive. That was my worst crime. She could have been nicer. The things she said were just awful. Talk about a disproportionate response. I just figured I had misjudged her character. My mistake, move onto the next. Life is too short to be with people who'll be that mean to you.

And then four years later, out of the blue, she e-mails me and wants to hang out with me. So I did. I wasn't very excited. We hung out a few more times and then she e-mailed me and said she could tell that I wasn't very excited to be hanging out with her.

Why do women do this? Treat a guy like shit and then get offended when he turns and walks away? I don't understand women. I don't have time for these games.


likes: 0
comments: 3

207,452 I've wasted years of my life dating the wrong person.


likes: 2
comments: 3

207,451 I used to masturbate when my wife went out and left me home alone. Now I eat.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,450 I sometimes forget where I am. I try not to panic. I know it will come to me after 20 seconds. But like what the fuck?


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,449 I have two brothers, one is a trump fan and lives paycheck to paycheck. The other a liberal democrat who is a multi millionaire.
The Trump supporter was bragging last night that he saved $300 a yr in taxes thanks to the tax cut passed a couple of years ago. The millionaire saved over $500,000 but choose to remain silent.

I know this because I do both of their taxes.


likes: 2
comments: 8

207,448 I know a creepy guy who actually does own a white van...


likes: 2
comments: 2

207,447 Was there any evidence at all presented at the impeachment trial? I was trying to keep an open mind. All I heard though was "He's a bad guy... He's a menace... He must be removed..." But I didn't hear anything at all that resembled evidence of wrong doing. Seriously, tell me there is more to this trial than just Democrats wanting to vent their anger. How embarrassing for the country.


likes: 3
comments: 9
flagged

207,446 People tell me that I’m like sunshine and that I brighten anywhere I go. It’s very sweet and flattering, but beneath my surface is a howling thunderstorm that I keep hidden...


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,445 My sister's new house number is 666. Got that right. LOL.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,444 I am hanging on by a limb.... My relationship is falling apart, I feel like I'm failing my kids, I'm dealing with postpartum depression and have a great bond with my baby but I dream about getting sick and dying or dying in a car crash. Never harming myself but dying . I think it's because I would like to know how my husband would handle it.



likes: 0
comments: 1

207,443 I am hanging on by a limb.... My relationship is falling apart, I feel like I'm failing my kids, I'm dealing with postpartum depression and have a great bond with my baby but I dream about getting sick and dying or dying in a car crash. Never harming myself but dying . I think it's because I would like to know how my husband would handle it.



likes: 0
comments: 2

207,442 Something I read here but I've also noticed myself. No one takes responsibility for their actions. They are quick to blame others in order to avoid any personal blame. I did it differently when I was working. When I did something wrong, I'd walk into my boss's office and tell him I messed up. This would turn heads. My co-workers would quietly tell me I'm ruining my career by admitting to a mistake.

By 20 years later I was running the company. That's no accident. They kept promoting me because I was so honest and trustworthy. They knew they could count on me to do the right thing.

To young people, ignore the political schemers at work. Be a good person and you will thrive.


likes: 7
comments: 1

207,441 I get nervous around strangers. I get flustered and make no sense. I feel like an idiot.


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,440 I'm at an age where all these weekend warrior "athletes" are getting their knees and hips replaced. They banged themselves up so much with their ultra sports that they now have to pay the piper. I don't mean to laugh, but okay, I am laughing. They went from running marathons to needing a walker. LOL.


likes: 2
comments: 0

207,439 Saw an asshat at a town meeting. He's a fucking asshole. Constantly online bullying everyone. Scores a zero in the personality department. Anyway, saw him at a meeting. As he was walking out of the room I kicked the back of his heel. He tripped and fell on the floor. I kept walking. Very junior high of me, but it did feel good.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,438 Sex with my husband means he jerks himself off and then inserts his penis in me at the last second so he can ejaculate in my vagina. I am nothing more than a recepticle for his semen and he wonders why I've lost my enthusiasm for sex.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,437 The mob justice being doled out on the internet reminds me of the Salem witch trials, or the middle ages when a crowd armed with pitchforks would hang someone based on an incorrect rumor. As a society we have gotten nowhere over the last 500 years. The dimwitted masses are still the same.


likes: 3
comments: 0

207,436 Typically in China, 2.6% of the population that gets the flu ends up dying each year. With this new virus, that rises to 3%. It's a little worse than the normal flu. But compare that to SARS where 10% of the patients die. Or MERS where 34% of the patients die. This coronavirus is not good, but it's not nearly as bad as some other recent threats. I think the media is running amuck again. They need something new to scare us with, so they've chosen this virus.


likes: 3
comments: 7

207,435 My wife will do something wrong. Like she'll take my car because her car is low on gas. In other words, she sticks me with the delay of filling her car with gas. It's selfish.  When we cross paths again later in the day, I mention I'm not happy she did that to me. She'll typically respond by telling me I'm not mad at her, instead she insists I'm mad that it's cold outside, or I'm mad at something from work, or I'm mad that someone took my parking space the other day. She can't possibly be the source of my anger. No never. In her mind she never does anything wrong. It must always be someone else who caused the strife.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,434 Knowing you're similar to me, I'm hoping you are keeping an eye on this website, after I gave you the link.
I miss you and it sucks that you've gone.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,433 23 years ago my BF dumped me. We had been dating for a year and then one day he just stopped calling. He wouldn't return my calls. He wouldn't respond to emails. I did a little stalkerish thingy and waited outside his apartment for a few nights but he never showed up. I later heard he was living with a new girlfriend. He sure got over me fast. I was definitely hurt, but alright, this was 23 years ago and I got over it.

But get this. A few days ago I get a text from him. It was out of nowhere. I have no idea how he even found my number. But I get a text and all it says is "Sorry," and he signed his name.

Like what am I supposed to do with that? 23 years later he is sorry? I'd like to respond with "Fuck you." But I didn't.

What would you do? Would you respond? Would you ignore?

23 years later!


likes: 1
comments: 13

207,432 I want to be married to a woman who is on my side. Why does my current wife have to make everything contentious? She's constantly trying to find me doing something wrong. There is no love here. There is no joy. I want to be married to a woman with a good soul who lifts my spirits rather than always cutting me down.


likes: 2
comments: 5

207,431 I finished a project at work. I was feeling festive. I stopped by a little bakery. There was a small chocolate cake in the display case. I mean really small. It was about 5 inches across. Perfect seeing it was for just me. I told the woman I'd take. She put it in the box and then told me that would be $41.

What?

I thought she made a mistake. I thought it would be like $10 if that. I said wait, I'm just getting the one small chocolate cake. She said yes, that will be $41.

She caught me off guard. $41 for a dinky little cake? I couldn't believe it. I wanted to say no thanks and never mind. But I was embarrassed. She had already put it in a box. I should have asked the price first, but I just didn't think it would be a problem. If I asked at this point I'd seem cheap and poor. So I paid up.

Now I'm pissed at myself. $41 for a something not much larger than a cupcake. What has happened to this world? Every business wants to ripoff unsuspecting customers. I'm so tired of it.

For sure, I'll never go to that bakery again.


likes: 1
comments: 8

207,430 I hope the Wuhan Corona Virus kills 99% of the population. It's the only chance we have of protecting the planet and surviving as a species.


likes: 1
comments: 6

207,429 I was hit on by two professors. I wonder if all professors bonk their students.


likes: 1
comments: 4

207,428 My mom thinks I'm religious, but the gold cross she gave me that I wear around my neck is nothing more than a fashion accessory to me.


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,427 It's so obvious that my husband's best friend is hiding his feelings for me. Even my husband knows. He thinks it's funny. I think that, if he made a move, I'd be into it.


likes: 0

207,426 I want my wife to blow me while a cock is sliding in and out of my ass. Is that too much to ask for? I've mentioned this idea to my wife multiple times. She always turns me down. Fucking prude.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,425 In the womb, every guy has a vagina. It eventually closes off. You can see the evidence in the large 'scar' that runs from the scrotum back to the anus. I love the idea that guy's used to have a pussy.


likes: 3
comments: 1

207,424 Six more months and our son graduates. Our lease is also up at the same time. It's been a long tome coming but I will leave my wife at that time. You've never met a nastier woman. My son and I (he will be 18 by that point) will travel around for the summer. I'm thinking we'll go see family and friends. Come mid August I'll drop him off at college and that's it, I'm done. I'm going to move out west and my son is welcome to come over the summers. My wife be damned. I never want to see her again.


likes: 3
comments: 1

207,423 I once farted while in the dentist chair.


likes: 1
comments: 1

207,422 I went to a Taco Bell. There was no one at the counter. It was bizarre. It took me a moment to realize that I had to place my order on a computer screen and pay using my credit card. Then after a few minutes an employee came out from the back room and handed me a tray with my food.

It was an eye opening moment for me. This is the future. Companies will be all over this idea. Why pay employees when customers can order on a computer screen. Twenty years from now I think this will be common place. There will be no employees helping the public. Everyone will help themselves.

I can't help but wonder how many former employees were fired to make way for this progress. The world is changing forever.


likes: 2
comments: 9

207,421 I had sex with him for the first time last Saturday, it was the best sex I’d ever had.
He is unhappy in his current situation and only stays for the kids.
I can’t stop thinking about him even though I know nothing can ever happen between us.
Every time I read a secret of a woman being a d*ck to there husband I think how much I wish I had someone that loves me and how I’d never treat them that way!


likes: 0
comments: 1

207,420 She wanted to know what first impressions people got from seeing her. No one could make the following comments without some sort of social rebuke: She has beautiful chestnut eyes and a beautiful smile. She's thick in a good way. She doesn't seem like she has a bad bone in her body. Someone took a slight risk and said that she would make a great mom for their children, which is true based on first impressions. My Grandmother use to say that even the best people have a little bit of "bad" in them. The Bible says we are all sinners. I'm not sure what I think about all of that, except that it seems true that no one is perfect. When I see a good example, it helps me aspire to be a better person. I feel like my demons are a waste of time and they chip away at who I really am. I want to be good. She radiates goodness. I don't have to radiate goodness. I just want inner peace. I don't want to make anymore dumb decisions if I can help it. I have to be bad here and there. It's unrealistic and overly idealistic and perhaps a bit naive, but I believe she is pretty much uncorrupted in any meaningful way by bad character traits or habits. The story goes that they were driven by madness and death by the sound of voices calling from the sea. This is what happens when people drown with their demons. I just have to have courage and walk the other way.


likes: 1

207,419 A secret thing men do. I worked in a male dominated white collar profession. The guys used to do this very sexist thing when interviewing pretty women for a job. They'd place an uncomfortable folding metal chair in the corner of the conference room. It was far away from the table. The woman would sit there while the guy doing the interview sat back about 6 feet away. The idea was that the woman had no camouflage. She wasn't able to sit behind anything that might cover her legs. She was out in the open. And because of the uncomfortable chair, she'd shift around a lot. This meant the guy sitting 6 feet away had plenty of opportunity to catch glimpses up her skirt. Women, look for this at a job interview.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,418 I kind of hope that Harvey Weinstein gets acquitted.


likes: 1
comments: 12

207,417 My boyfriend sticks his tongue where it don't belong. Yes there!


likes: 2
comments: 10

207,416 I prospect with my metal detector. I've found old coins, bullets, horseshoes and alike. Sometimes I find an old brass button. But there are times I find more than one brass button, in the same place, only inches apart. What are the chances two button fell of some poor soul's jacket at the same time? I'd say zero. When I find more than one button, what I think I've found is a grave. Someone is buried there and I'm stealing the buttons off his clothes. I feel bad. I still take the buttons, but yes I feel bad.


likes: 0
comments: 4

207,415 There's a woman I know who is volunteering as one of those door to door reps for Elizabeth Warren. She hands out literature and engages the homeowner in conversation about the candidate. But oh god, Warren's campaign doesn't know this woman. She never stops talking. She can go on for an hour without letting anyone else say a word. She's unbearable in this way. Kind of the worst thing you could do is let her go door to door and annoy the stuffing out of unsuspecting homeowners. Every door she knocks on will switch to vote for Bernie Sanders.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,414 It's much easier to get a job when you are pretty.


likes: 2
comments: 1

207,413 Best way to get revenge on a cheating husband?


likes: 0
comments: 11

207,412 Everyone should probably store some emergency canned food in a water tight container in the yard.


likes: 1
comments: 2

207,411 We live in an apartment. My wife wants a house. I looked at prices and told her we can afford a million dollar house. For that money we get something pretty nice. 4,000 sq. feet with a two car garage and a swimming pool. She says no. She wants a $10 million mansion. I told her that isn't possible given our financial situation. We're doing pretty well. No I'm not Warren Buffet but we are better off than most. A million dollar house is nothing to sneeze at. But she's holding her ground though. She's strong arming me saying it's a $10 million house or we stay in the apartment.

This is some ultimatum threat from her but O.K. we'll stay in the apartment. I'm perfectly happy in the apartment. Gosh, she sure showed me who is boss around here.


likes: 2
comments: 5

207,410 I had my yearly physical today and got into an uncomfortable argument with my doctor. He demanded to know why I don't follow through on all the tests he wants me to get, like a colonoscopy and a stress test and some stomach camera test. I told him outright that I think these tests are meaningless. The medical profession has morphed into a bunch of unneeded testing which drives up profits but does little for the patients.

Don't get me wrong. If I had cancer and needed a tumor removed, I have full faith in doctors to make things right. But it's all this preventative crap that worked it's way into the system over the last 20 years. It's quadrupling the costs of everyone's insurance, and to what end? They rarely find anything wrong. All of us now spend $20,000 in premiums a year to pay for these frivolous colonoscopies and why? - only one out of 1,000 tests actually find anything. It's not worth it. Look at the math. Collectively we are spending $20 million on tests. And the one person who actually has colon cancer could have been treated for $200,000. Meaning we've been duped into spending 100 times too much for practically the same outcome.

He told me I'm wrong. He said doctors don't give unneeded medical tests. I laughed. I could see it made him mad. He said he and his colleagues are dedicated professionals, they take their work very seriously. I said, "Is that right? In the news just yesterday was the story of a doctor who performed a procedure on a patient while standing on a hoverboard. Does that sound professional?"

I could see the steam coming out of his ears. Why? Because I said something truthful?

See how that works? You must take these expensive tests and if you don't, the doctor gets all pissy. Again doesn't sound very professional.

Time for me to find a new doctor, although I'll bet the same attitude is pervasive in their "profession".


likes: 1
comments: 9

207,409 I married an imperfect husband, but he's a perfect father. It leaves me in a conundrum.


likes: 0
comments: 2

207,408 The human body is getting cooler. The average body temperature has fallen from the well-known 98.6 degrees to 97.5 degrees.

I'm not sure what to make of it. I'm sure there are those who will argue this is also man-made and brought about by global warming. Cooler brought about by warmer?

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/are-human-body-temperatures-cooling-down/


likes: 0
comments: 10

207,407 I searched for a ex girlfriend's email address on Google. Up came the address on some random art site I don't know. It was in a list of thousands of email addresses. Oddly, right after each email address was a randomish word like peaches123 or babygirl1 or chicago999.  For my ex girlfriend the word was her middlename followed by her area code. It took me a moment, but I realized these were passwords.

Uh oh. I'm picturing what happened. To use the art site you need to create an account. Your ID is your email address and then users have to enter a password. I'm guessing in many cases the user entered their standard password ---- we all have one. This means I can probably get into everyone's email account, youtube account, facebook account etc. It especially means I can get into my ex girlfriend's stuff. Oh boy this could get interesting.




likes: 0
comments: 5

207,406 I hate myself. Every time I see my stepdad I think about his big dick inside of me. Ever since I saw the outline of his dick while we were all swimming. It’s massive.


likes: 0
comments: 5

207,405 Porn is a joke.
If I have to sift through 20 more videos to find ONE single dude that doesn’t look like he crawled out from under his mom’s trailer house...I’m going to scream.
Their dicks are average.
Their bodies are grotesque.
They have the anonymity to cover their fucking faces.
Quit making this stupid, unattractive porn already. I hate it. I can’t imagine anyone actually likes it.
F/35


likes: 2
comments: 4

207,404 Why the fuck does anyone care about the royal family?
Another family that doesn’t understand what it is to not be born filthy fucking rich.
No way for the majority of us peasants to relate, but ok...


likes: 1
comments: 0

207,403 There is an incredibly handsome, successful Jewish man who I get along with and would like to date but we are mainly good long distant friends, we are the same age. Except for the fact that he keeps telling me he wants me to give him a child and that my daughter needs a younger sister. Something must be terribly wrong with him. I’m a broke, single mother, college student.


likes: 0
comments: 6

207,402 The US and China have been feuding for the last year. Now China has a new dangerous virus sweeping through their population. Hmm. Makes me wonder how the virus suddenly showed up.


likes: 0
comments: 0

207,401 For these past 6 months I'll get into a zone while working. I'll bury my head in the computer for 12 hours straight. Then I'll look up and think gosh, I need a break. I'll instinctively reach for the phone to call him, when I remember, oh that's right, he died. So I go home instead .... and repeat the same pattern the next day.


likes: 2
comments: 4

207,400 Most nights my dinner is canned soup & crackers. Sometimes a little sandwich. It's quick, tasty, healthy and best of all, cheap. I don't like to spend a lot of money on food.


likes: 2
comments: 5




(c) 2018
home search archives help donate