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203,653 I would tell you happy father’s day, but you’re a miserable waste of oxygen who brings our family down every single day by just existing. So I won’t.


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203,652 You’re an amazing man. I am happy to have met you


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203,651 I hope all the dead beat fathers enjoy the silence today.


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203,650 Everyone’s problems are so petty, but in our minds it’s the end of the world when we don’t have solutions right away.


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203,649 We were once stuck in a traffic tie up for two hours. To pass the time I gave hubby a blow job with cars all around us.


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203,648 It might be Father’s Day but the only dad I’m thankful for is my daddy. xoxo


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203,647 My husband and I only pretend to get along. We don't like each other very much. I still open my legs for him tho because it's easier than not opening my legs.


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203,646 I’ve forgiven my dad for the horrible things he’s said to me and the awful things he’s put me through in my life. I understand the pan he’s endured in his life was so immense that it boiled over and caused him to hurt others. It doesn’t excuse it, and it still hurts to think about, but I know it wasn’t actually anything personal. Pain and suffering make some people act in ugly ways. Sometimes we butt heads still, but things are much better now. I’m looking forward to talking to him on the phone today to wish him a happy father’s day.

My grandfather (my mom’s dad), however? He lives with my parents and I’ll do what I can to avoid having to talk to him today when I call to talk to my dad. No one hurt him to make him the way he is. He is sexist, racist, and was horribly abusive to my mom and my grandma when she was alive. He beat and belittled them and treats my mother like his servant. My sister and I try to be close with him, but he clearly favors our brother as his favorite grandchild. He does not give two shits about my sister and I or what we’ve achieved in our lives. I’m female, unmarried, dating a man who’s not white (oh, the scandal!), and don’t plan to have children. Nevermind that I have a Master’s degree and a career and fully support myself. In his opinion, I’m not doing anything right. Hell, neither is my sister because she and her husband have been married a year and have no kids on the way yet, nevermind her Master’s degree and successful career as well. We have stopped trying with him. I can’t say it doesn’t hurt. Mostly I just feel bitter, though. I do not want to talk to him today. He might be a father and grandfather, but he hasn’t earned the honor of being a “dad.”

Happy Father’s Day, Dad. I know it’s been hard, but I’m glad things are better now with us, even if it took a couple decades to get there.


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203,645 I think I might have met my one and  only.  Now if it would become reality that I could touch him, kiss him and feel him inside of me. I wish he would finally make the move to make it reality. Business is business and personal is personal. We both deserve happiness in our lives. Please make the move to make this happen. We both know we want each other so let’s make it a reality.


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203,644 I bought a penis stretching device ($300) to increase from my average 6".  It kinda worked!  I grew about a half inch or so.  I'd have it on for about an hour a day at night.  It felt weird to spend so much time focused on my penis though.

I stopped using it and I've since 'reverted'.  Oh well.


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203,643 The summer before 8th grade, my family (mom, stepdad, my brother, and me) went to the beach for vacation. I was able to bring a friend and the whole week we would walk around on the sea wall in the evening. They had lights out and the ocean looked really beautiful with as the sun set all the lights blinked on. On one of these walks we ran into my dad and stepmom with my two little brother. I was happy to see them as didn’t see them often and ran up to talk to him. My dad didn’t even recognize me. Its been 27 years and I still think about that. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it.


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203,642 My son hasn't said more than 5 words to me this month. He's reminding more and more of Adam Lanza.


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203,641 For some reason, the skin of my armpits is really sensitive. Shaving makes them break out in a stinging, red rash. Ditto for deodorant. So I clip the hair with the shortest extension of an electric clipper and put powder on them instead of deodorant.

I shower every day and wash my pits in the ladies' room if need be during the day. But the funny thing is, I don't think my sweat smells that bad. It has a very mild smell something like chives mixed with Sweet Tarts. I kind of like how it smells.


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203,640 I haven’t worn my wedding ring in three weeks. My husband hasn’t noticed. This is where our relationship is now, I guess.


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203,639 I pick my nose and toss the boogers behind the couch. In a few months when I move and all is revealed, I am going to blame the kids ;)


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203,638 Is there ever a scenario where your boyfriend has a secret message app and he hasn't been cheating on you?


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203,637 I haven't seen any pictures,  but I really really really hope my boyfriend's exes were not as attractive as me. I know that's something a 16 year old might say. But I can't help it.  This is what happens when you were the ugly duckling for ...oh.....25 years!


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203,636 So I found out I am not good with wet cold air, or artificial indoor heating/ac.  When there is no air conditioner on or it's a regular nice day, i'm good.  It sucks that everywhere is airconditioned and it's not even that hot yet!  My job has the ac on and it's like 68 degrees out, you don't need it, and it's a private place so he puts it on as he sees fit.  It's mental, I swear people just put on their ac's as soon as it's June because it's supposed to be hot, but you don't always need it!  


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203,635 I told my husband it's a girls night out tonight. I lied. I'm seeing my ex. I'm telling myself it's not a big deal. It's all innocent. Nothing's going to happen. Except I shaved. Why did I shave?


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203,634 I drank her piss last night !she was inside of me... I was so turned on!! I wouldn't do it with anyone else but with her I love drinking her in.


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203,633 This is a secret to my husband apparently, because he keeps acting this way. My husband had a friend over the other day. The friend is starting a new business with some other people. “I guess these guys (friend is working with) have some real money,” my husband said. “So I want to make sure I get on the ground floor.”

How? Not by investing. Not with sweat equity. But just by being there. My husband always does this. He is always looking for the next get-rich-on-other-people’s-effort opportunity. About every other week, he’ll say, “I’m meeting some guys with money and they have this idea, so I want to make sure I’m there when the idea takes off.” Or he’ll say something like above, involving a friend. He can’t just get a regular job, everything is beneath him, of course.

Of course, the friend looked like he was trying to not make a disgusted face as my husband talked about what role he wanted in a business launch he had nothing to with. It ends like this every time. People hear him talk and realize he wants to leech off of them, so he’s never invited to join them. It’s embarrassing for everyone involved, except my husband, who finds this behavior acceptable and never seems to understand he’s being cut out because he’s seen as a scum bag.

My husband was given everything growing up. And here he is at age 40, still expecting that everything should just come to him.


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203,632 When I'm fucking my wife I close my eyes and pretend I'm fucking you.


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203,631 I silently judge everyone l see.


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203,630 What the hell is with everyone's obsession with Hamilton?!?!! I finally saw it , to see what all the fuss was about. Dear Lord- I want my money back. I have never been so bored and I honestly couldn't wait for it to end! Ooooooh it's so PC to have non-white actors play these historical characters! How very groundbreaking! And the music? Blech. Dude should stick to writing for cartoons. Nothing in it was memorable. Nothing. It's like the Emperor's New Clothes, isn't it? Admit you hated Hamilton and..... dead silence.... and then 20 questions as to WHY you don't adore this perfect masterpiece. I'll tell you why: because it SUCKS.Save your time and your money. Skip this one.


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203,629 I would do anything to "do over" my marriage, even though I know we would not have stayed together regardless. When you love someone you owe them basic dignity and kindness. When you do not treat a partner this way, even if fundementally incompatible, you will be haunted all your life


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203,628 I'm glad to an extent that I don't date around anymore but I sometimes miss being treated like a sex goddess. I miss feeling desired. I miss knowing I make them hard.

After several bad relationships and a lot of isolation, I have gained a lot of weight. I don't make any man feel that way anymore.


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203,627 We got married really fast just to get it over with, and we knew it was way too soon. We did it behind everybody’s back’s, and pretended like it was a nonchalant thing, but I’ve regretted it ever since. It’s almost been three years, and I’m afraid that you’re going to ask me to marry you for realll now. Like, (not just for the main reason we did it in the first place), but because you think the relationship we have is healthy/normal. My signs are pretty clear I’m not in it the same as you. I’m sorry, but. Please don’t ask me. I don’t think I can say yes.
This isn’t “love”..
There’s no connection holding me down. It makes me sad, and I crave it all the time. Maybe that’s why I’m longing for my ex. That’s the last time I felt that spark.

This is a mess.

:( c


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203,626 When I’m on my antidepressants I can’t have an orgasm due to the meds. When I’m not on them I’m too depressed to masturbate. Sad :(


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203,625 Butch lesbians turn my stomach.  I don’t care about their sexuality. Love who you love, but why do so many of them choose to look like gross, fat, slovenly adolescent boys now? You can’t help but imagine that they smell.  I’m guessing many of them were very ugly girls and didn’t have much of a choice besides becoming boys.  It’s sad. If you’re a woman who loves women you probably don’t want a chubby hipster guy with a dad bod who happens to have an overgrown vagina.


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203,624 SB is the best. Gorgeous, patient, loving, funny, sexy, giving, smart, and tolerant of me!  
Have you ever been in Love?
I NOW KNOW what it is!


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203,623 I teach in high school. I took the day off on Wednesday to deal with stomach issues. I submitted online request for a substitute teacher and found one easily.

So, I come back to school on Thursday and see a man hanging outside my classroom door. He told me he was my sub on Wednesday and left the jump drive in my classroom. Ok, no problem. I open the door and let him in. I have two computers in the classroom that I use. I go directly to my desk where the desktop is, and the sub is looking around the room.

My desk has two draws on the left. The upper draw has my personal items, such as dental floss, lipstick, mirrow, chewing gum, etc. Substitute comes close to my desk and asks me to open my top draw to check for his jump drive. I find it strange, that somebody, who is a guest teacher, would use my personal draw, but I think it's fine. At his request I open the draw to find the pair of his stinky crumbled socks in it. What? Who the fuck will do something like this? Why would you put your stinky socks in my personal draw with my hygiene items?
I understand that it was hot on Wednesday, like 80+ degree, but could he possible put his socks under the desk, inside his pocket, his car?
With a poker face I said "I believe these are yours", and handed him his socks.
The sub is never coming back to my classroom.


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203,622 While hiking I bathed with wet naps for a week. It worked pretty well. Loved the smell.


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203,621 Times change!  I've been a lawyer for 28 years.  When I started, most of the lawyers were old white guys. The court reporters who recorded depositions were all attractive young women.  Today I'm in a deposition and the lawyers are both attractive young women and the court reporter is an old balding white guy.  


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203,620 I used to keep a spreadsheet of all the girls I was with. It was about 60 of them. I created categories and gave them grades. Pretty. Intelligent. Good in bed. Good job. Clean home. That sort of breakdown. I was then able to sum up the subcategories and give them all rankings. I came up with an overall winner. It wasn't my girlfriend. It was her best friend.


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203,619 I miss him so much, how do I stop the pain?


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203,618 I don't get it.


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203,617 My wife stopped having sex with me five years into our marriage.  It's now been 10 years with no sex.  I've mentioned this to her before and she just pretends like she didn't hear it or she changes the subject.  I think I'm justified to find it somewhere else.


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203,615 Maybe things would have been better if my ex-wife didn’t become schizophrenic and threaten everyone with knives...


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203,614 I'm so fucking tired of my husband's narcissism.  He doesn't care or think about anyone but himself.  He's away for work.  This afternoon he texted to tell me that they got tickets to an event.  I said, awesome, have a great time!

Several hours later, he sends me pictures from the event.  I responded with pictures of us huddled in the basement, along with a screenshot of the tornado warning alert we'd gotten from the NWS.  No response.

He called an hour and a half later when they were leaving, and launched right into talking about it.  When he was finished, he noted my silence and asked if I was okay.  I said, "Um, yeah, we had a tornado warning. I texted you about it."  He says, "Well, are you in the path? Is it close by?"  I said, "It was more than an hour ago. It touched down in [next town over]."  He says, "So you're okay then."  He then said they were going out to eat.

He called back a couple hours later, just before midnight.  We're in the same time zone, so he's aware of what time it is.  No concern as to the fact that I was sleeping.  I said, "Hey, what's up?"  He immediately started talking about the event again, and his night.  I knew where this was going, so I put him on speaker and pulled out the laptop.

Our "conversation" lasted 39 minutes. Thirty-seven and a half of those minutes were him just talking non-stop about what they did, where they went (restaurant, bar, liquor store, gas station, convenience store), what they ate, who they met and talked to and about what, etc., etc.  He didn't ask about my day until right before the end, and then started talking about himself again before saying he was tired and was going to sleep.

So here I am, half past midnight and wide awake.  Not sure what time I'll make it back to sleep before having to get up at 6.


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203,613 I HATE when my boyfriend tells me I look "tasty like a snack". Just tell me I'm beautiful please! Please don't use the phrase "tasty like  a snack."


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203,612 For someone who doesn’t lose, you sure lost me!


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203,611 I know I have some hearing loss (48yo) but I hear most things just fine.  Busy classroom, I can discern who is speaking out of eyesight rather easily.
However, my wife has decided that A. I am deaf B. That I am willfully not getting a hearing aid.
Um, I really don't need one.  Maybe it seems like that when you talk to me from 50' away in a normal conversational tone when I am elbow deep in the dishes with the water running.  Maybe it seems like that when you yell out from the shower and I am 2 rooms away.  Maybe it seems like that when I turn to leave a room and you half whisper something to me.
Yeah, I can't hear that but I could hear Jared whispering to a classmate when I am talking 20' away.
"I'm not going to repeat myself.  Then you'll realize you need a hearing aid"
LOL, you wouldn't believe the number of conversations in the past year I have "missed" because I refuse to play her game.  Before I get flamed, I have pointed all of this out to her already but she refuses to listen... irony.


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203,610 I have a friend at work who mumbles. I tune her out now because I’m sick of saying “what?”

I also worked with another friend today who mumbles as well. Only I took off work today to move and clean and vacuum. While this friend is helping me and vacuuming she’s mumbling to me. She speaks under her breath. I must have said “what” at least 10 times. Then she’s cleaning the bathroom with the fan on (all the spray & chemical smell) and mumbling to me, again can’t hear her.

Finally she asks me if I have a hearing problem.

No friend, I hear fine... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!


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203,609 As time goes on I realize how much my boyfriend has lied to me about his past. The lies were intended to make him look more significant. He lied about his education. He lied about his family's money. He lied how his father was famous. I didn't need these lies. I liked him for his own being. Now I'm wondering if I like him at all.


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203,608 I'm a little skeptical that Iran is blowing up oil tankers. We have an election coming up. During war the sitting president always wins re-election. What if this is a setup to start another fake Middle East war? Perhaps we are making it look like Iran, but really it's the US doing the mischief.


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203,607 Related to a secret below, I have slept with two married women. I don't know if this is typical or rare. I'm curious if you can share how many married people you have slept with.


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203,606 I couldn't tell you the names of 90% of the women I fucked. I knew their names at the time they let me stick my dick in their pussies, but it was so meaningless I don't know their names anymore.


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203,605 Female 29, I love average to small penis, the big ones hurt. about 4-1/2" to 6"


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203,604 I am severely depressed. I thought finding my dream job and getting my life back on track would help my depression, but now i just feel like my life is meaningless. If even my passions feel pointless, then how am I supposed to feel like my life has any significance? My anxiety is worse now too because now i have a boss expecting me to be a productive and functioning adult. I don’t think i can do this for much longer. I am so blessed and yet living feels like a punishment..


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203,603 I have to go away for a few months for work. I'm very concerned my wife is up to something. I see it in her demeanor. I think she is planning on cheating. It's just a sense I get from knowing her so well. This is very hard on me. There is absolutely nothing I an do about it except hope this very untrustworthy person acts in a trustworthy way.


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203,602 Even though I was married for some time, I don't really remember him. And that's a good thing. How can you remember something that really ....didn't happen? Divorce. Best decision I ever made. I should have done it much, much, MUCH sooner.


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203,601 Every Friday we head off to the local bar, me, M. and D.  We know everyone there and have a good time, except that D is always trying to shirk his bill.  We first just got one tab for all three of us but noticed that he would never put in his fair share.  I asked the bartenders to split the bill from now on.

M is rich.  Millionaire rich.  To me, it does not matter.  Sometimes he buys me drinks but I buy drinks for him as well.  I am the only person who never puts his hand out around him.  D always expects M to pay.  He would love it if I paid, too.

Friday, D went out golfing with other people at the bar.  When we got there he was already three sheets in.  He was the big hitter, buying his new friends shots.  At the end of the night I picked up the tab for M and me and it came to $50.  D asked me if I was going to pick up his tab, too.  His was $48 because he bought shots for everyone.

Ummm...you want to play big hitter and buy shots?  Then pay your own fucking bill.  So tired of leeches.


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203,600 I turned down a lot of sex when I was younger because I was afraid of getting an STD.  Sometimes I regret not taking the opportunities when they arrived, but in retrospect I think I made the right decision.


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203,599 The smell of death has always followed me.

Could it be my turn?

Scared. Stroke.


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203,598 I wish there was an option to have this kid, and then decide if I want it or not after the fact. But unfortunately..that’s not really an option, so I just have to do what I think is right.

For myself.

And no - I will not opt for adoption.


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203,597 When I was younger I used to be what you call a skinny fat (for the exemption of the time I ran track) , my weight was always between 98 pounds to 125 (I’m 5”4) then got pregnant got super fat lost most of the weight and kept it for a few years then got injured, couldn’t walk or put any weight on my feet and gained all the weight back , it took almost a year to recover and been trying to lose slowly the weight. Fast forward to the present, I’m not near as slim as I used to be but I learn to manage my stress better and actually look forward to working out , I’m more fit and have actually some muscle than I did when I was thin even though I’m practically still overweight and my flexibility it’s not the bad , I can touch my toes , can do intermediate Pilates and my goal by the end of the year it’s to be able to do a split . Getting older has taught me not to obsess with the scale and instead to keep challenging myself physically.


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203,596 Finally.
My husband’s ex who is so self-centered and fucking snotty, always stretching herself into pretzel like positions in yoga pants, or on a god damned beach with her legs open to the sea, looking like she wanted the ocean to fuck her cavernous vagina, the bitch that would. not. stop. calling him & messaging him years after we got married.
Finally.
That cunt is looking old.


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203,595 I, my husband, and our friends - all military Veterans - went to Washington, D.C. for Memorial Day weekend.  We went for Rolling Thunder.  This is when thousands of bikers, including Vets, ride their motorcycles from the Pentagon through the streets of the city to call attention to our POWs and MIAs.  On the median of one of the streets stands a Marine, in full Dress Blues, who stands at salute from the beginning until the very last bike passes.  This takes several hours.  In front of and behind him on the median are hundreds of combat boots, each with a photo of a fallen troop.  It is an incredibly sad and somber event.

Today I was looking through my pictures.  At one point, some of our friends were on the other side of the street, so I was expanding the pictures to see if I could find any of them.  And then I saw it.

I've never been so angry.  In the middle of the street (where you're not even supposed to stand), just a few feet behind the Marine, was a young girl in her 20s.  Oh, my God.  Her outfit.  She had on the tiniest of cutoff Daisy Dukes that left little to the imagination.  And her shirt?  Well, there was no shirt.  She had on a skimpy bikini top that barely covered her breasts.  I couldn't believe it.  At a time and place where we were to be giving honor, she was not acting honorable.   Yes, it was a hot day.  But you couldn't throw on a tank top at the very least so you'd look somewhat decent?  What a fucking disgrace.  If I had seen it myself, I would have told her to have some goddamned respect and cover the hell up.

But when I think about it, you know what?  It's not really her fault.  She didn't know, because she wasn't taught what is and isn't appropriate.  

Keep up the good work, parents of America!  You're doing us proud.


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203,594 I was lifting a long box and I needed my wife's help. She made it clear she was pissed. I asked what's wrong because we were having a fun conversation until I asked for her help.

She said, "You called me a pig."

"What?I didn't call you a pig. I asked for your help."

"Before. You called me a pig before."

She had me thinking back to earlier in the day. I would never call her a pig but I was trying to figure out what she was talking about.

I said, "What were we doing when you think I called you a pig?"

"We were moving a chest of drawers."

"What? We weren't moving a chest of drawers today."

"It wasn't today. It was when we first moved into this house."

"When we first moved in, like 15 years ago?"

"Yes."

"Really? You think I called you a pig 15 years ago and you are only bringing it up now? That's not fair. I'm sure I didn't call you a pig. It's not something I ever say about anyone. And why would I call you a pig when it comes to moving furniture? Pig and furniture don't go together. And why oh why are you bringing this up right now?"

"Because you called me a pig and you should apologize,"

************

Like what am I supposed to say to that? How do you live with a person who randomly brings up something from 15 years ago? Especially when it never happened. I guess I should be pleased she couldn't bring up anything more recent because I'm actually a nice fellow. Still, I don't know how to deal with her anymore.



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203,593 I am a 20 year old female and I’ve taken two virginities. How many have you taken?


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203,592 Sorry but Spicoli was the worst part of Fast Times at Ridgemont high. They should have cut out his entire part. That kid should have beat the shit out of him after what he did to his brothers car. I think he ruined the movie for me.


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203,591 My kids had to leave their home. It tears my heart apart. And it can all be traced back to one person, one person who felt their thrills were more important than a family,  the security and innocence of children.  I know what to do with my free time.


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203,590 A few years ago, before it closed down, I was actively responding to personal ads on Craigslist. I'm married. I wasn't trying to meet anyone. It was just playing around and flirting with women. It was rare to get a real response though. Too many of the ads were prostitutes. On a whim I responded to a few MM ads. They were real. Guys would talk about wanting to suck my dick. I would respond asking if my wife could watch. They would say yes. Again it was all in fun. Nothing would come of it. Except one time a guy said he'd jerk off on my wife's panties. This was intriguing. I could let him do it and then I'd put the panties back in her drawer and in a few days it would be thrilling to know she was walking around with another guy's dried cum rubbing up against her pussy without her knowing. I agreed to meet the guy in state park parking lot late at night. I got in his car. He was very nice. He wasn't scary and menacing. He undid his pants and started jerking off in my wife's thong. I had never seen an erect dick before except for my own. It took a good 10 minutes. He moaned and shot a load in the crotch of her panties. Hot damn. Very exciting. It made me hard. He asked if I would jerk off for him. This wasn't in my original plan but I thought what the hell, why not, no harm. I undid my pants and started stroking. He asked if he could watch up close. Okay. He asked if he could touch my balls. Okay. He said my dick looked dry and he could put it in his mouth for a minute and get it lubed up again. Um..... okay. My dick was in his mouth. He did more than get it wet. He sucked on it and rubbed my shaft. It was too much for me. I said I was about to come. He started sucking faster. I shot a load in his mouth. It was possibly the best orgasm I've ever had. I zipped up. I drove home. I spent the rest of the evening with my wife watching TV. This was my only time. But I've been thinking about doing it again, except Craigslist went away.


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203,589 I’m an only child. The cat we had from the time I was two years old until the end of my freshman year of college I will forever consider my little sister.

That’s probably weird, but whatever. She was family, she was the coolest cat.


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203,587 Another person I know has had to turn to crowdsourcing to handle a medical situation. This is us. This is America. Hardworking people are forced to beg strangers for money because it's more important that insurance companies turn a profit. This country has truly lost its way.


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203,586 I was painting rooms in the house all day. It was hot and tiresome work. My wife didn't help. The plan was for her to help, but she never does. She always has an excuse. Her back hurts, or she has to meet a friend, or whatever. But after the sun went down and I was finishing up, I noticed it was a nice night. A pleasant chill in the air. I mentioned this to my wife and asked if she'd like to go for a walk. She said yes. I said okay, I just have to finish washing out the paint brushes. I'll be ready in 10 minutes.

She starts in. She always starts in.

"Can we leave now? Why can't we leave now? Why do we have to wait 10 minutes? I want to go now. Why do we have to wait? Let's leave now. I wanna go now. You asked me to go on a walk and you aren't ready, who does that...."

She went on for the entire 10 minutes.  I was sorry I asked her. I should have just gone alone. This is what always happens.


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203,585 I lost my 15 year old cat back in 2015. I still get teary thinking about her. I miss her.


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203,584 Is there anything more repulsive than the "bro"? You know what I am talking about . Loud, overgrown frat boys that travel in packs in backwards baseball hats and cargo shorts. They're the ones that never give up their seats for the elderly on the train. They're too drunk from the game they just left to notice. They're the oafs without manners who swear loudly in front of little kids in public. The ones that double park the expensive cars daddy bought them wherever they damned well please.  Whenever I see these guys, I secretly want something bad to happen to them so we can all see it. Maybe they walk into a glass door. Or fall down a flight of stairs. Or maybe a homeless person decides to beat them with a shovel. Well come on now, like you wouldn't enjoy seeing this happen, too! Let's face it: bros are extra people.  They suck up oxygen the rest of us can use.


likes: 4
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203,583 Whenever one of my relatives or friends wants to share their opinion with me and says it will be "humble" I know it will be anything but.


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203,582 I doubt you check these anymore, SB...but THANK YOU! I love you.  You are beyond the amazing I thought you were!


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,581 God. These dating apps like Tinder and Bumble, etc are a JOKE. How can anyone find anything real on it....this goes for women, men, gay and straight...! Depressing as hell . How on earth are you able to tell if someone is worth even a meeting from a few pictures and 1 paragraph? Ugh. I give up.


likes: 1
comments: 8

203,580 You can’t judge happiness or misery by IG or Facebook posts.  A girl that I was friends with was a successful nurse who was also a world traveler. She really enjoyed her singlehood and every picture she was somewhere in a tropical place enjoying cocktails and beach fun. Last week she committed suicide. I am still so shocked about this I was only an acquaintance but this really hit me. I guess you just never know what is going on. Pictures are only moments, milliseconds.  


likes: 4
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203,579 I am child free but I really dislike other women who act like it's some big badge of enlightenment. I have never seen a more bitter, angry, miserable group of women. The things they say about children and mothers is repulsive.


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203,578 If you are young and being bullied, it DOES get better. Just wait until your life is way better than theirs...and you can laugh uproariously at their misfortunes. It WILL happen! It will!

Over a decade of my young life was miserable. No female friends. I can't trust other women to this day, they ruined me.
Hateful, hateful twats. They made me believe I was this hideous beast unworthy of anyone.... and I was young and dumb and BELIEVED them! I wish I could go back in time and tell my younger self otherwise. So badly.

But let's turn this around.

Look what happened. Those bitches all become nobodies . Saggy, wrinkly, stay at home seacows with more lines on their haggard Midwestern faces than any road map (shouldn't have hit that bottle as hard in college, ladies!).

Married to ugly, equally average Joe Blows who all have snore inducing jobs like cubicle jockeys. And they probably have ED. Their kids? Dumb as boxes of hair, like them...equally unimpressive. Perhaps even more so. But they decided to breed because they don't have a minds of their own and couldn't think of anything else to do!

Fun for them is a trip to Target. A vacation for them happens maybe every 5 years, and the real exciting one is in Florida (barf!).

Fuck you. You knew better, even back then. You haven't
changed . You deserve this miserable existence.

Who is laughing now? Me!

I now have my own business. I've been to over a dozen countries. Had the good sense to NOT have kids (that's why I look 15 years younger than those assholes) and now I'm being ravaged by a delicious boy toy -sometimes up to 20 times in 24 hours (no joke).

I raise my middle finger up in your honor, wherever you are.

So, yeah. Take heart, young gals. This will happen for you, too.


likes: 1
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203,577 IMHO you can't be born the wrong gender. You're born with either a penis or a vagina (in rare cases, both). That's not wrong. That's just reality. The fact that you have trouble accepting what is, THAT's what's wrong. We all have feminine and masculine qualities. To go to great lenghts and pay for complicated, invasive surgeires, so that you may APPEAR a certain way to the world and insist on people using the pronouns acceptable to you and making a big stink about it if they don't, THAT's what's wrong. The complete denial of reality, the inability to bear what is, the constant mental anguish that comes from battling the facts and the facts are that your self-obsession is obliterating everything that is real and meaningful, THAT's what's wrong.


likes: 5
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203,576 Do 26-year old women even know 49-year old men exist?  I want to say something to her.  But I don't want to be the "creepy old man."


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203,575 Some women think they’re freaking superheroes because they pushed a baby out of the only thing a man gives a shit about.
I won’t let a man win by birthing his child. I’ll die alone, thanks. Not a problem.
At least I won’t be that woman that tries to justify her existence with, “I was meant to be a mother”.
If that’s it - do us a favor and don’t.


likes: 5
comments: 4

203,574 It will be determined in a little over two weeks, but it may finally be time to remove the second set of footprints from my profile picture.


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203,572 Not all mother's and daughter's butt heads. I'm realizing this isn't a normal family dynamic. Abuse and dysfunction is something I've learned to except and cope with. FML




likes: 0

203,568 So, this kid that I knew through my childhood passed away two years ago. We’ll call him Jack. I found out about a year ago while browsing Facebook, looking for old friends when I saw that Jack had passed away. He was in the Marine Corps. I was extremely fond of him, as was pretty much everybody that knew him. He had a contagious smile, great laugh, and he was super humorous.
Jack and I weren’t close, but he lived a street or two down from me, so we’d ride our bikes or scooters together after school the first few years he moved to my town(we were about 10-years-old). Basically, our childhood memories were us just playing together, having fun.

After I found out Jack had passed, I cried a lot. Just the loss of such a great person, it was difficult. Unfortunately, I got too interested in his passing a while after I originally found out, so I did some research. While following his remembrance page, I finally got some clues and pointers from things other people were posting on the page.
After this year’s Memorial Day passed, another friend of Jack’s posted something. I believe the person was Jack’s father, but I can’t recall for sure.

The problem is ~ this (father) mentioned in this Memorial Day post that Jack had made the ultimate sacrifice being a Marine. Making it seem like he died in the line of fire, but he had never done anything extreme - hadn’t left the country, wasn’t stationed anywhere except the US, and wasn’t involved in any war-related/military related accidents.

The problem is - Jack died, because he decided to drive home, 45 minutes, from a bar in another town. That’s right, Jack died, because he decided to drive his car nearly an hour away after drinking and partying with friends for hours prior. He drove approximately two miles when his car swerved off the road and into the embankment. They don’t know if the instance killed him, or if he died after being thrown from the car. Seatbelts were intact, so he didn’t even remember his seatbelt. Maybe that could’ve saved him, but regardless -
I lost respect for Jack. I am still fond of our memories, but I don’t cry anymore.
Drinking and driving - it’s just NOT worth it, people. It’s 2019.
There are hundreds of other options that are still more practical than you, the intoxicated person, from getting behind the wheel and driving yourself. Even if it’s just around the corner. Put the drink down, or have someone hide your keys.
I wonder who you’d be today, Jack. I wonder where life would have taken you. Rest In Peace.


likes: 1
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203,567 If I am pregnant with my husband’s child, I am having an abortion.


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203,566 i can type faster than i can talk.


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203,565 I went to a daytime outdoor music festival. Two girls in their twenties were sitting next to us. There were both wearing dresses that extended down only an inch below their pussies. From the get go they were standing and jumping around. Every time they they raised their hands over the heads, the dresses would rise up 5 inches. The were both wearing lacy thongs. I had infinite up-close views of their asses and pubic hair. Best concert event ever.


likes: 1
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203,564 552 Give it time next week or in 48 hours it will change. Schizophrenia with bipolar disorders usually tells us different.


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203,563 @553 My friends son looks like a little girl and her daughter looks like a boy.
In future her kids will definitely need ear surgery. Deformed ears are no joke.





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203,562 Masturbating is so much better when you’re home alone and don’t have to worry if anyone can hear the vibrator. I do it every single time I’m home alone even if I’m not in the mood.. I can get off and relieve stress.


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203,561 CNN has a White House correspondent. So does The NY Times, The Washington Post, etc.

But I found out today that Playboy magazine also has a White House correspondent. Like WTF? A porn magazine has an reporter covering the White House?

We are one strange country.


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,560 The Gay Pride rally is looking for volunteers to help pick up used condoms after the event. I'm not kidding.


likes: 1
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203,559 I really like eating steamed celery.  I eat a lot of it


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203,558 I have NO idea why famous people get married. They can get all of the dick/pussy they want just because they are who they are! What is the point of marriage?


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203,557 Reading that a hip-hop/rap person is dead makes me smile.


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203,556 Stop calling me. I don’t owe you my time, my expertise, or anything else. The fact you would call me and expect me to just give you legal advice on your time and my dime because you think it’s owed to you is both laughable and pathetic. The next time I see your number on caller ID, I’m calling the cops. For real, back off.


likes: 1

203,555 There's a hot 24 year old autistic chick I'd like to bang.


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203,554 Here's the perfect example of what my wife does. She left the house today at about noon. She came back just before 2:00. It was no big deal. I have no reason to keep track of her. But when she came home I casually asked what she was up to. She said she was at the market. I said that was a long time to be at the market. I also noticed she didn't bring home any groceries, so I thought here we go again, she's lying about something. She must have seen it in my face so she volunteered that she ran into her friend Susan. They talked and talked in the market and in the end my wife was so tired standing there for two hours that she decided not to buy anything and instead come home. There, that explained it.

Except an hour later I checked the voice mail messages on the home phone and a massage studio called in the morning to confirm my wife's appointment at noon for a 90 minutes massage.

In other words, suspicion confirmed, my wife lied. She also probably dropped over $150 on the massage. This is money we don't have. But she thinks nothing of spending on herself. Then as icing on the cake she thinks nothing of lying to me about it.

I mean how are we supposed to have a relationship if she lies and selfishly spends our money on her own whims?


likes: 1
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203,553 A girl I know had a baby...and the baby kind of looks like a blob fish.... I’m usually a kind person. How could I think something like this?? I feel kind of guilty because I admit it makes me laugh a little. (Obviously I’d never actually say this to anyone...)


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203,552 I have a wonderful job that pays well above the mid six figures, I can work virtually. I have a great family of supportive parents and siblings. I also have a very beautiful home.

I am very grateful for all of this because not too long ago I wanted to die.


likes: 6
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203,551 I'm too polite to telemarketers. I should get a backbone and hang up. But I don't want to offend them so I wait for them to stop talking and then politely explain I cannot buy what they are selling. This can take a few minutes. Sigh.


likes: 0
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203,550 I didn't realize how big my new girlfriend's nose was until she sent me a selfie. I dunno, bad lighting, or the angle of the camera, but that's one big snoz.


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203,549 Jesus. Kids make me so freaking mad. My daughter took my car. She was forced to put gas in it for the first time in the year shes been using it. She calls me from the gas pump 50 miles away and tells me the the car battery died. I had no way to come get her. I told her to talk to the gas station people to see what they could do. For $80 they would jump start the car. I agreed. The car still wouldnt start. The mechanic then noticed the car wasnt in park. It was a still in gear. He put it in park and the car started. The battery wasnt dead after all. My dumdum daughter didnt think to put the car in park when she stopped for gas. I spoke to the mechanic and asked if they still had to charge $80. He its a labor thing, but he was kind enough to drop the price to $50. Still, I'm out $50 because my daughter doesnt know how to put a car in god damn park.


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203,548 My wife went out and forgot her phone. I took the opportunity to read her text messages. No smoking gun there. But among other things, I looked on her maps app. She had recently entered an address which I did not recognize. I googled it. It's a one person law office which specializes in divorce. I'm not sure what to make of that. I'm hoping she looked something up for a friend???


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203,547 The voters approved a change to an ordinance. The change took a certain power away from one group and gave it to another group. A few weeks after the vote, an official went into the official town document and changed the wording to give the power back to the first group. It's subtle. It's buried way deep down in pages and pages of legalese. Of course no one noticed.

Now a question has come up on who has the power. People are looking at the ordinance and concluding the power stays with the first group because that's what the voters must have approved, the official town document says so.

That's how our democracy works. Voters approve one thing, but someone on a mission changes it behind the scenes and there you go, one person undid what the voters decided. Corruption works.


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203,546 I went to Gay Pride this past weekend.  It was the first time I'd ever gone. On the way there I felt almost exactly like I did going into combat.  Maybe worse because I was totally unarmed and didn't even have a helmet on.  I'm glad I went though.  Nothing bad happened, nobody attacked us, and I got to stand on a sunny street with the man I love and watch some floats go by.  We weren't the youngest people there, but we weren't the oldest, either.  Maybe I can do this.


likes: 12
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203,545 Gender dysphoria is a mental disorder.


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203,544 I've never trusted my wife. After reading these secrets, I feel totally justified in doubting her.


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203,543 I'd really like to find a dominant fwb. I'm a white woman who has only been with black men. Lately it's been difficult to find new friends bc of work. I miss the stress relief and feeling wanted. Its been way too long.


likes: 1
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203,542 Underwear should be disposable. They should be made out of a soft paper type material. Wear them once, toss them out. It could probably be done on the cheap. I box of 30 for $10. Then we wouldn't have to wash underwear. We wouldn't run out after a week because we forgot to do laundry. Just reach in the box and pull out another pair of paper panties. It's kind of weird to get a little pee and poop on your cloth undies and then you throw them in the washing machine with your other clothes. Yuck. Disposable paper undies would be a much better solution.


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203,541 I listen to the chatter on the police radio. I can tell how uneducated the cops are. Bad grammar, rude comments, talk about getting drunk. I don't fault them on this. I suppose it takes a certain amount of not being smart to run towards danger, instead of away from it.


likes: 1
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203,540 Every once in a while I look back at my failed marriage and shake my head. I felt unloved. I felt my wife had given up. I noticed she was distant. There were stretches of time where her location was unknown. There were long phone calls she made in her car at the top of our block. There was a new password on her computer and phone.

I tried to talk to her about it many times. She dismissed my concerns. At first she gently said I was silly to be concerned about her love for me. That gave way to her angrily yelling that I was paranoid and I needed to see a therapist about my insecurities. She pounded me with this. I was left feeling depressed and guilty. I was destroying my marriage because I was imagining things in my head. I felt so low for doubting her. She turned the screws on this point and rubbed it in with disdain how my insecurities were leading me to wrong conclusions. She told me she was a good wife and I was a bad husband. She told me she was disgusted with me and wished she never married me. Truth be told, it left me feeling suicidal.

A few months after the turmoil peaked, and I thought things might be getting better, she filed for divorce. Then it came out she had been seeing someone else for the last two years of our marriage. In other words, she lied about her affair and blamed me, saying it was all in my head and I was insecure.

I almost killed myself over her debasing me. But in fact I was right all along. She lied the whole time.

I'm still sort of numb.


likes: 0
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203,539 You know how you can be talking about something, and then you get on your phone and computer, and then there are ads about the thing you were talking about?  Okay, now this is getting weirder.

I read a lot of news articles that link to an Instagram page.  Recently there was one about traveling, and I thought I might want to follow this page, so I created an IG profile.  Over the past few weeks I've enjoyed looking at pictures and watching videos about travel, food, DIY, makeup, art, and other interests.  Thisisn't for socializing for me, it's just for vids and pics.  I haven't looked for or added anyone I know.  My profile picture isn't of me, I don't have a headline or whatever it's called, and I don't use my real name on it.

So yesterday I'm on it, and I see the "friend suggestions."  There's a girl that I'm acquainted with, an old online friend who I've never met in person.  Hmmm, that's weird.  I start thinking about how this connection could have been made.

She and I used to talk on the phone, but that was many years and many phones ago.  I don't have her number in my contacts, so that's not it.  We've emailed before, but the email we used isn't the one I used to sign up, and I don't have that one on my phone anyway.  I only check it once in a while, and only on the computer.  We had each other on LinkedIn, but I haven't used that since 2011.  I know that IG and FB are connected, but that can't be it.  She's on my personal FB page, which I haven't been on in months - I'm logged into my work FB on my phone.

I'm wracking my brain, but can't figure out how IG made this connection.  This is disturbing!


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,538 I live with a hoarder. Fascinating what she does. She thinks if everything is arranged in a stack, then it is not junk. In her head it's highly organized and important keepsakes. Our house is filled with stacks and stacks of stuff. On the rocking chair in the living there is a box of her mother's old clothes. He mother died 30 years ago. On top of that is Risk, the board game. On top of that are a few picture frames. On top of that is a plastic bag filled with phone chargers from devices we threw away 10 years ago. On top of that is box containing our bank statements and bills, also from 10 years ago when we moved into this place. All that stuff has been sitting on that chair for all this time. It was placed there when we moved in and it has never left that seat. To my wife, this is fine. Because everything is stacked, therefore it's not junk, it's organized.


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203,537 I graduated with my Master’s in April. I gained so much from it, but god damn if I’m not still tired from it! The university is now sending me emails about starting my Doctorate. It is ridiculous. A year of my Master’s was hard enough (I have severe ADHD and am not always a great student), and I’m pretty sure 2-3 years of my Doctorate, which I don’t need in my current job, would probably do me in.

You know that part on Forrest Gump where he finally stops running across the country, and he’s all ragged and scraggly looking and he says “I’m tired...I think I’ll go home now”? Next time they email me about it, I’m emailing them a gif image I found of that scene, hahaha.


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203,536 No, I don't have a 'plan' to leave you.  Call it a dream.  A waking dream.


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203,535 People actually have healthy relationships with their fathers? I wonder what that's like.


likes: 3
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203,534 How do people have confidence? Don't you have family members that do nothing but tear you down?


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comments: 5

203,533 What is this "lingering" thing that women do around men?  What does it look like?


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203,532 Yeah if you sit in the aisle seat leaving the window seat open I'm totally accidentally hitting you in the face with my bag and stepping on your toes..


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203,531 I'm wearing my cleanest dirty shirt.


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203,530 My husband and I have great sex. But I want it more often than he does, so I end up getting off a few times a week on my own. I watch exclusively lesbian porn. Women are so hot.
F/33


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comments: 2

203,529 I would rather stay at home drinking beer and smoking pot than hang out with my friends.


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203,528 Terrible that a crane in Dallas collapsed onto an apartment building killing a person.

But I'm left scratching my head. The spokesman for the Dallas Fire and Rescue Department held a press conference and said, "Most of the crane collapses we deal with...."

Hows that? Most of the crane collapse you deal with? Like how many crane collapse have there been in Dallas? Don't ya think that's a bit of a problem if you have more than one crane collapse? What's going on there fella? Maybe it's time for Dallas to look into this a little more...


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comments: 0

203,527 Four of my teeth are loose. WTF?


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,526 I don't trust female friend groups where every person in it is skinny. I also don't trust female friend groups where every person is fat. You only hang out with people with YOUR body type? What are your friendships based on? Medium sized girls aren't allowed to have friends? Is that it? We just won't have any friends? lol. You won't allow someone a little bigger than you or smaller than you in your group?


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,523 I'm gay. Pushing 50. Been in a 20 year monotonous - excuse me, monogamous relationship.  In my entire life I have been with 7 guys.

Every day I drive past these construction workers. All I want to do is ask one to hop in, grab a bottle of Grey Goose, and head to the beach. I'm so fucking bored with my life.


likes: 2
comments: 9

203,522 Why are people so stuck up?



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203,521 I cleaned my car. I do this every few months. I vacuumed and wiped down all the interior.

When I was done I looked in my wife's car. It was a dump as usual. She never cleans her car. I sighed. Then I cleaned her car too. I gathered up all the food wrappers, empty soda cans, receipts, coupons, junk mail, used napkins, and french fries. I put it all in a trash bag. I then wiped down everything with Lysol to make it smell better.

I brought the trash bag into the house to show her the large pile of debris. She got mad. She said those things in her car were important and I had no right to throw them out. I said I looked at every item before putting it in the trash bag. The junk mail included an electric bill from two years ago. The coupons were from stores that went out of business. The receipts also went back months and years. The french fries, well, she could fish them out of the bag and eat them if she wanted to.

She took the trash bag from me. She said she'd go through all the items. I told her she certainly could, but an hour from now I don't want to see this garbage still in the house. Go through it and then toss the junk in the trash.

Of course an hour later the trash bag was still sitting on the kitchen table. Next day, same thing. I reminded her to go through it. I explained how unfair for me to clean her car only to have to look at the resulting garbage on my kitchen table while eating. Get rid of it!

Next day, there it was, still on the table. I took the trash bag out to the garage. I opened her car door, and emptied all the contents back into her car, french fries and all. My kitchen table was cleaner, and her car is just the way she deserves.


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203,520 I will never allow an Alexa in this house.


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203,519 I missed her SO MUCH! she came by Friday, and it was so great. Her juice, her cum, her blood is on me.


likes: 1
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203,518 I don't know what's in Sunny D, but it's delicious!


likes: 1
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203,517 I went to a local meeting on environmental issues and what can be done. Basically everyone there drove up in the SUV and was carrying a plastic water bottle...


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203,516 I had a great orgasm this morning. Ahhh. I'm sad though. Schools let out in a few days for the summer. Then the house won't be empty anymore. No more time alone for the next few months. :(


likes: 0
comments: 2

203,515 I often get those migraine headaches where I see jagged flashes of light in my field of vision. It lasts for about an hour and I can't quite see anything directly, only with my peripheral vision. My secret? I sometimes drive home after work like this. It's spectacularly dangerous. Try driving when you can't see if there is a car in front of you.


likes: 1
comments: 5

203,514 I’m to the point that I shun away from things “made in China” I don’t impulse buy if it has that branded on it. I know is not 100% achievable for me but what really pisses me off is American flags that are made in China. Is nothing sacred anymore?


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,513 I went to a Rachel Platten concert with my sons. They are young teens. Three times during the concert the singer told the audience how she is breast feeding and hormonal. I didn't go to the concert so my sons could get a crash course in female biology. They are young boys and need to know nothing about her mood swings. Women don't get this. Stop talking about your personal health issues in public. Especially if you are on stage in front of thousands of total strangers. We were there for the music, nothing else. I will not go to another one of her concerts.


likes: 0
comments: 11

203,512 I always shower before sex. It's a requirement for me. My wife, not so much. She'll have sex even though she sat on the royal throne an hour earlier. There was one time though I didn't shower. Not my idea. My wife insisted we do the deed without me washing up. I thought alright, we'll do it but I will block her access to the back by keeping my legs tightly shut. Worked for a bit. But then she kept trying to part my legs. I was not comfortable with this at all, and I mean at all 100%, but alright, I gave in. She went to town. She licked my butt for a good 10 minutes. The thought of it still makes me uncomfortable, but it was her choice and she seemed to enjoy it. We've never discussed the event.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,511 Everything got better after I quit drinking alcohol


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203,510 I just had an iui this morning. I want to tell everyone but also want to wait until I find out if it works.


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203,508 Most people have no idea how astrology works , when used properly you might be surprised how accurate it’s and you might use it for your advantage. The sun sign (the sign you get based in the day you are born ) it’s the way people see you but not the real you ( the will be your ascended) which it’s place in your 1 house , the way you know which sign it’s your ascended it’s by knowing the day , hour and place of birth and most of the time will be different from your sign . For example a person might be a Leo ( sun sign) but people that doesn’t know this person personally might see it as a outgoing , flirty, flamboyant at times but it’s the person has for example Virgo as an ascend might actually be the opposite ( since Virgos are practically the opposite of Leo’s , so in reality these person might quiet , shy , anxious at times. We also have other planets like the moon , Mercury , Venus they all represent different aspects and depending on what house they are located it affects your life . A person with a Venus in the 10house it indicates the person might used her looks in the work place or might benefit from working in the beauty industry (Marylin Monroe) had these placing .


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203,507 Aries,
Are the biggest hypocritical, exaggerative, judgmental, liars on planet earth.

Do you want to know the funny part? They think nobody can see right through their bullshit.


likes: 0

203,506 I need advice. I got a random friend request from a man in Pakistan. He looked really odd (to me, a westerner) and I was curious what religion he was as he appeared more Indian than Pakistani, and what public photos available show a daughter without hijab or hair covering. I know nothing about Pakistan aside from the fact that it’s majority Muslim. I accepted to request out of curiosity of culture and to see more of where he leans religiously/politically/etc because the fact that he’s friend requesting a total stranger from across the globe who is female for one and clearly a Westerner is so off to me. I accepted, checked out the photos and then immediately unfriended, probably in the course of 3-4 minutes.
Later I receive a message, “hi mamm, how are you?”
I reply, “I’m well, but I’m sorry I do not know you!”
At 1 am HE CALLS ME.
I wasn’t aware he could call me on my personal cell, not being friends anymore. This has left me jolted and confused because in the 9 years I’ve had Facebook no one I’ve never known has called me before.
I of course declined his call and immediately blocked him on Facebook, but something about this encounter leaves me unsettled.
Is he a terrorist? Is he the US government trying to study me because I’m not anti-Muslim and I’m not 100% pro American government? Or because I’m the daughter of an immigrant with a funny sounding last name?
I’m just a normal person with kids who is a stay at home mom, but this whole thing has jarred me.


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,505 Hotels in England are tacky and dated. They look like they peaked in 1920 and have been going down hill ever since.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,504 You always seem to be mad at me, but it doesn’t even matter because I love you so much.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,503 I'm watching the Tony Awards. They are doing a scene from Oklahoma. I guess it's on Broadway now. There's an actress on stage in a wheelchair. This totally ruins it for me. I don't hear the singing. I don't see the other actors. All I see is a modern wheelchair in a scene that is supposed to depict America 100 years ago. It's political correctness gone too far.  

I'm sorry for people who are in a wheelchair. But it is what it is and it means you can't do everything like the rest of us. That's not my fault nor anyone else's fault. So don't make it be our burden.

Next we're going to see the disabled special interest groups insist a ramp be built up the side of Mount Everest so wheelchair bound people can also reach the summit!


likes: 2
comments: 15

203,502 People like to act like the Puerto Rican day parade is so bad..  yea alcohol plus heat plus lots of people plus hot girls... there will be some problems. But other parades are bad too. St Patrick's day? They get drunk and fight too. Other parades as well, but they just like to talk about the Hispanic ones meanwhile the Irish cause quite the ruckus


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,501 My childhood friend's facebook post said her son got married. So of course I had to look at the wedding photos. I could see my friend. I could see her son. I could see her son's male friends. But I couldn't find the bride. That's when it occurred to me. Oh. Times have changed.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,500 So I do not really like being around you unless I am drinking. There is something in your energy or something about you that bristles me. I can honestly say on here, that I would not be with you if you It were not for a couple of things. 1. I want someone to grow old with and you seem a safe choice. However, after this weekend I can see how unhealthy you are and how unwilling you are to do anything about it. The answer to every slight uncomfortable twinge is not to take a pill. Work out, eat healthier. Right now a future with you seems dreadful because In no time you will be disabled.
2. I don’t want to hurt you or to cause you unhappiness when I leave. My family likes you. You have money and could help me live in a way that eliminates my financial stress. You are very kind a generous with that. Realistically isn’t that all that matters?
Without these two issues, there is NO WAY I would be with you. I don’t want to be with you and I don’t like having sex with you. You are so kind mostly but underneath your kindness I sense a strong desire to control. Every time I’ve ignored that in the past I have regretted it. But all In all, I can’t imagine how crushed you would be if I left.
There is another person I cut off because they didn’t spend time with me but I like them so much more. I love being with that person, I dread being with you. (Well I guess it’s obvious what I should do) but does that really matter. I should be smart and stay with you. It’s more sensible.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,499 Eye grabbing headline:

"Mississippi laundromat attack after spat about washing machines caught on video"

But when you click on the story there is no video of a spat.

Really? You just have to laugh at the poor quality of our media coverage.

See for yourself.

https://www.foxnews.com/us/mississippi-laundromat-customer-attacks-employee-after-spat-about-washing-machines


likes: 0
comments: 0
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203,498 My wife sets me up. In bed at night she'll push her body up against me. I'll take it as a sign and start gentle rubbing my fingers on her leg. Then she blows up at me, saying I've got to be nuts if I think she wants sex. It's a game for her. I think she purposes teases to see if I'll bite. Then she enjoys getting angry. It's been over two years since we've had sex. We are not old. Why do women enjoy denying sex more than actually having sex?


likes: 2
comments: 10

203,497 Sometimes I sneeze and a blob of booger ends up on my laptop screen. I do my best to wipe it off, but if you look closely, there are about a dozen booger smudges on the screen. I should probably wash that off with soap and water, but I haven't ever found the time.


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,496 I've decided I'm going to help him with the euthanasia. I suspect this is illegal. But I'm not going to look it up. I don't want to know. He is my friend. He is asking for my help. I am going to give him my help. If it means I go to jail, well that's crazy, but okay world, feel proud you took a harsh criminal like me off the streets.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,495 Why do you always talk to me with a bitter sneering tone? I can say good morning and you instantly sound angry.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,494 I was going to buy a sailboat and live on it as my new lifestyle, but too often sailors mention how their boats smell like an outhouse. That's basically what boats are I guess. Everyone poops onboard and the holding tank only gets emptied once in a while. Could you imagine living in a confined space with all your poop from the last few weeks? I think I'll be staying on land.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,493 I'm told it's good for me to buy a rainbow color pride scarf, but I'm evil if I buy it from big business. I must buy it from a small mom and pop business.

Oh.


likes: 0
comments: 7

203,492 My boss can't really think that he's doing right by me by paying me such a small wage....right? I made in one year what he makes in 3 weeks. All because of my ideas. He brags that he is doing so well to anyone who'll listen but then tells me how he struggles financially. I wish I could just quit but I can't get hired on anywhere else. I feel so trapped...


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,491 My earliest musical memory is this:

Tommy doesn’t know that pain is. He doesn’t know who Jesus was or what praying is. How can he be saved, from the eternal grave...

See me. Feel me. Touch me. Heal me.


likes: 4
comments: 0

203,490 I hope everyone who was friends with my child molesting father gets raped up their asses until their intestines prolapse.


likes: 7

203,489 I’m definitely a straight female, but I totally enjoy the un-mundane porn videos (straight on straight guy porn) It’s so weird to type it out, but whatever. It’s the truth lol


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,487 The mothers of my generation are really embarrassing. They all look like they’re just trying to find the best lighting in every cafe so they can photoshoot their six-month-old child in lulublabla, and nonobabybooboo poopoo shop inc.

Ugh. Stop procreating, and get some news hobbies.
Basic, boring b*tches.


likes: 3
comments: 3

203,486 I'd like to walk across America. What a journey of foot and mind it would be! I think I can walk 20 miles a day with no trouble. I recently walked 10 miles. It took four and a half hours. So I think 20 miles a day should be doable. It's 3,000 miles across America, so the walk would take 150 days, or 5 months. That's not too bad. Kind of amazing really that you can walk across this big country in just 5 months. If I started now, I'd be in Southern California in late October. Perfect.


likes: 2
comments: 10

203,485 I think my sister did it better than anyone. She was married to a school teacher. She was kind of eh about him. She filed for divorce.

Her best friend was married to a rich investment banker. My sister convinced her best friend it's better being divorced. So the best friend filed for divorce.

Then my sister married the investment banker.

Well played sis.


likes: 2
comments: 5

203,484 For six months we've been planning this trip. Now at the last minute you tell me you aren't coming. Know this, if I have to go alone, I'm not coming back.


likes: 2
comments: 3

203,483 Amazon might move into the empty Sears stores?

Doesn't that defeat the entire purpose of the internet? Wasn't the point that stores are expensive to operate, but the internet is only a computer server and a warehouse?

Weird.


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,482 Throwing up on my boyfriends dick was honestly a mess, especially since it was only our third date. But it’s ok I should probably get over it I’m sure people have done worse things during sex


likes: 1
comments: 7

203,481 A guy drove to the supermarket a few miles from me. His dog was in the car. He lowered all the windows six inches so the breeze could blow through. He went into the store.

A few minutes later a stranger came along. He started screaming there was a dog locked in the car on a hot day. He reached in and unlocked the car. He pulled the dog out. He called the police. He brought the dog into the store where it was given water. The dog's owner was summoned over the intercom. When he came to the counter, he was shamed for leaving his dog in the car.

I think this is very messed up. It would not be hot in the car with all four windows open six inches. I think the stranger over reacted and wanted to be the hero of the day, as evidenced by him posting the entire saga of his heroics on Facebook an hour later.

I think people go too far. They are looking for a problem when there isn't a problem.


likes: 5
comments: 0

203,480 Told my husband about the horrible African American customers I deal with on a daily basis.
I get cussed out, side-eyes, words under the breath - just disrespectful people altogether

I told my husband about today’s journey with those people, and he said,
“I wonder why they can’t figure out why they’re treated like shit”

I may have married a very special person. He gets it.


likes: 14
comments: 7
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203,479 Fuck you, Debbie. Fuck you. I won't be there for you any more. John can handle this crap from now on.



likes: 2
comments: 4

203,478 If you hear a pop pop pop sound and you think it's gunshots so you run away and in so doing you trample other people, well, then maybe you deserve to get shot you selfish asshole.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,477 Life is simple for me because I find it very easy to forget people.

Sorry, whoever you are. I don't even know what you're mad about anymore.


likes: 2

203,476 Cheerios give me digestive problems. How is this possible? Cheerios are like the most plain food out there!


likes: 0
comments: 8

203,474 I want to have my own YouTube channel. But I have nothing interesting going on in my life. It's kind of a problem.


likes: 1
comments: 13

203,472 If a student from here places third in the hurdles at the county meet, it makes the front page on the newspaper.

If a student from here places 2nd in a national academic competition - meaning 2nd in the entire nation - there's no mention in the newspaper.

It's all about sports.



likes: 2
comments: 0

203,471 My 16 year old daughter leaves her birth control pills on the bathroom counter. I get to see it everyday. I was against the idea of putting a young girl on birth control. It was a large bone of contention between me and my wife. If you don't want to get pregnant, don't have sex at such a young age. I lost this battle. Now I think the two of them conspire to leave the pill package out so they can rub it in.


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,470 I hate when someone calls herself an artist. Michelangelo was an artist. You work in a clothing store at the Mall. There's a difference.


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,469 My wife is angry at me because I'm not rich enough for her tastes. I made great money. We have plenty in the bank. So I retired pretty young. This angered her to no end. She thinks I should keep working so she has access to more and more money. She doesn't get it. I hate her attitude. I should continue working 12 hours a day until I die so she can buy herself more jewelry? The more she talks this way the madder I am at myself for not seeing her selfishness sooner.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,468 I always figured I would die at age 82. Ever since I was a kid, I just knew that was the age I would die.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,467 I have a very difficult teenager. If he's not up by 11 on the weekends, I go into his room to make sure he hasn't committed suicide or OD'ed on drugs.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,466 Here's a Yahoo headline today. Does anyone doubt this is #FakeNews? You don't even have to read the story to know the media is distorting what was said.

Our news outlets are a joke. They embarrass themselves everyday.




likes: 1
comments: 8
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203,465 I’m depressed. My life is okay, but when I read what people say to their supposed loved ones, it makes me not want to pair up with anyone. Don’t people know how much it hurts to hear adjectives thrown at them? It doesn’t “make” people do what you want usually - and if it does, you lose them in the long term.

Like he’s losing me. I’m trying to give him a chance, but anytime he assasinates my character because we have different viewpoints and priorities, it makes me hate him. I’m being by words, not fists and I know it...

And when I see how many people talk to others like that, people they claim to love and married... It makes me fearful of ever getting into another relationship.

I’ll only get with a KIND person - if there are any left. People are so nasty these days.


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,464 The love of my life is married and is the exact same age as my father. I don’t want anybody else. He’s the one. Love doesn’t make sense. It has nothing to do with logic and that’s what makes it so wonderful and terrible all at the same time.


likes: 2

203,463 Another missing hiker has been rescued. He was lost for about a week in Arkansas. Here it is on a map. The red circle at Buckeye Trail is where he started. He was found three miles to the east (to the right on the map). There is a town of Big Fork about three miles to the north. There are farm fields about three miles to the south. There are roads every one mile to three miles.

How can you be lost in such a small area for a week? Once he was spotted by helicopter, it took rescue crews an hour to walk to him. Meaning he was an hour away from civilization. Yet he was lost for a week.

I'm not understanding what's going on with all these hikers being lost. It would be like getting lost for a week in New York City's Central Park.




likes: 1
comments: 13

203,462 I’ve gotten to a place where I have no interest in having a relationship. The idea seems more like an intrusion on my privacy than a necessity.  I see guys my age and they don’t have anything to offer that I want. I have a better job and more education than most of them. The ones I’ve met can’t even carry on a decent conversation. They all seem to be looking to fuck as many random girls off of the internet as possible.  They don’t seem to have any real interest in sharing actual intimacy, particularly intellectual and emotional intimacy which are the only types that I do miss at times.  30- and 40-something guys are a joke. And even older men cheat. So why bother?  The internet has destroyed love. It doesn’t exist anymore. Just indiscriminate sex, lies, and pretense..and I certainly don’t need that shit in my life. I’m doing fine on my own.


likes: 7
comments: 4

203,461 I can't go to the gym. I'm afraid I will run for one minute on the treadmill and collapse from a heart attack.


likes: 2
comments: 5

203,460 It's about 8:30am Saturday morning and I'm already on my second can of malt liquor. My life sucks.


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,459 I don't like the girls on porn hub. They are all way too skinny and have small boobs. I think they look too plastic. I am by no means a chubby chaser, but come on. I would like to see curvier girls on pornhub. I like women who are a bit thicker. You have to go to the BBW section to find ANYONE over 100 pounds. Ladies if you weigh 101 pounds, you are obese. A giant whale. Give me a break.


likes: 2
comments: 3

203,457 In this day and age, if you don't look like one of the models on instagram, you're basically undateable. And even they are photoshopped. Nobody is good enough. How can my boyfriend like me when he sees all those pictures? I wonder how he feels about it. I'm in pretty good shape and my face isn't bad. I work out. I think I look good, but I definitely don't look like them. I came close to looking like that when I couldn't afford food, but that's not sustainable now that I can.  Maybe i should start acting super cocky so it doesn't show. I feel better when I dress up, but I don't think it will ever be enough. He has coworkers who are beautiful as well. This relationship is doomed. Yeah, it's probably just my paranoia or my insecurities, but what if I'm right???


likes: 1
comments: 6

203,456 Social media seems to accelerate narcissism and mental illness, as well as Botox and duck lips.

It’s silly and sad.


likes: 4
comments: 7

203,455 My boyfriend is going to a party and I want him to invite me. I'm not going to tell him this. I want him to invite me because he WANTS me there, not because I beg him to. I think that when people are dating, they usually want to go to these things together. But I'm not going to mention it.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,453 I keep my profile public so it can eat you up inside. So you can spend all day thinking of things to say. It consumes you. It controls you. And it all comes back to you. And I laugh.


likes: 2
comments: 1

203,452 I hope they don't think I still care.


likes: 0

203,451 I don't understand why buck's or hen's parties are considered as healthy and normal parts of the process of committing to a life long partner.
Maybe I'm just different to others.


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,450 Life is not exciting for me. Childhood flew by, and I’m stuck still trying to finish college for a career I’m not even interested in.
I don’t want kids, and though I’m married, and love my husband as a person, I’m not in love with him, and I know he wants different things, kids, marriage, everything else in a relationship/life, but I just want to take a nap, and not wake up.

Some people really just aren’t up for all that life is supposed to be.
25-whatever


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,448 People with children are the reason I stay inside. People in general, are the reason I stay inside, but there’s nothing more annoying than a couple and their screaming children that just really makes me want to gauge my eyes out.


likes: 4
comments: 0

203,447 Having kids wasn't worth the trouble.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,446 I live across the street from a restaurant. In the summer they have tables out on the sidewalk. Boy are drunk people loud. I wish they could come by my apartment when not drunk and hear what I hear.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,445 I wrote #414 about having the lazy wife who leaves shit out for months.  We had an argument today about how she rarely cleans up after herself.  It really wasn't an argument because I didn't even raise my voice.  I wasn't in the mood to fight.  

She was giving me a ton of bullshit excuses - "I'm tired," "I do this stuff for the kids," "I'm always doing laundry," whatever.  I told her I'm tired all the time, too, yet I still pick my own shit, AND I pick her shit up, and I'm doing the other shit around the house that needs to be done, too.  

"I just didn't have the time to go through that box!" she said.

"You mean to tell me in 7 months you didn't have 15 minutes to pick the things out of that box that you wanted to throw out?" I responded.

Probably 20 minutes of these excuses.  I told her she was a slob.  She left the room and started crying.

She spent a few hours today cleaning her stuff up.  It would have taken her 10 minutes had she bothered investing a few minutes at a time picking up after herself over the last few years.  The house actually looks somewhat livable now.


likes: 3
comments: 14

203,444 I never imagined my life would end up like this. Friday night. Alone. Sitting in the dark after the latest binge and bulemia episode. I just wanted someone to love me. I just wanted to be happy...


likes: 0
comments: 2

203,443 I can’t help you
I can’t fix you
I can’t love you


likes: 2
comments: 4

203,442 My dad gets mad if I show any independence at all. If I get a job without his help, if I get my driver's license, if I have any friends that aren't him, he gets FURIOUS with me. He has been like this since I was a kid. Before you call me a bratty teenager, you should know that I don't live with him, and I am 29 years old. I got a job and felt like I couldn't tell him. He's still mad at my sister for getting married 5 years ago (she's 33 and married to a very nice man). I have not told him I got back together with my ex. It's been 6 months. He can't know. He once came into my apartment and yelled at him. His excuse was that I wasn't answering my phone and he was worried that someone was attacking me. Bullshit. He was worried that I might be socializing with someone who isn't him. I ignore him now. He blames me for his heart problems. Says the reason he has them is because I don't go to his house every day and cook for him (because that would erase 40 years of smoking and a high stress job he's had for 20 years, and no excercise). My other sister is so fucking brainwashed by him and believes his sob stories every time. He's also mad at her for waiting a whole 2 weeks before telling him she has a boyfriend. They've been together for a year and he refuses to meet him. She has tried to make plans for them to meet many times, but my dad always refuses. He sabotaged a job I had when I was in high school. He never wanted me to move out of the house. When I was a kid and he found out I had learning disabilities, he used them to his full advantage. He convinced me that I would never be able to have a job or move out of the house. And I believed him. He wanted me to be so ashamed of myself that I would never be able to have friends or date. He now says he wants to kill himself because I don't spend enough time with him. But here's the punchline: He used to say the same thing when I used to go to his house every day. FUCK HIM. I am all done.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,441 I find Ted Cruz incredibly sexy with the facial hair


likes: 1

203,440 I know a man. Several months ago he lost his job selling real estate. He has made several mentions online how he is broke.  He's married. He's been posting video clips of his wife. She seems very nervous and shy. I can tell she doesn't want to be filmed. No wonder. Yesterday he posted pictures of her underwear hanging out to dry. Very strange to post pictures of your wife's underwear for all to see. It's not rational.  

Today he posted a new clip with his head shaved. He looks like a psycho lone gunman. In the clip there's a voice-over saying: Man is born. Man lives. Man dies.

I'm starting to get concerned. I think he's losing it. I have a feeling something bad is about to happen.


likes: 0
comments: 7

203,439 My husband made the comment last night that he feels like he ruined me. I told him that was silly and made a joke out of it to lighten the mood.

But he’s right. He ruined me.


likes: 3
comments: 4

203,438 The high school nurse is sooo hot!


likes: 3
comments: 0

203,437 For work reasons my father moved away for the 12 months before I was born. My mother finally joined him and a week later I popped out. My parents hated me for this. I was a constant reminder of her cheating. This left me with a large emotional scar. I was like the step child no one wanted. They made my life very difficult. I was the last one to eat after their "real" children had dinner. I had to sleep on the porch. There was no real bedroom for me. I had to get a job at 12 and contribute the money to the household. They went to Florida once on vacation but left me with a neighbor. Try living like this, being constantly reminded what an unwelcome burden I was to them. Yes, as an adult I'm a bit anti social. Yes, I don't easily make friends. Yes, I can be awkward in conversations. But maybe cut me some slack knowing that my life while growing up was painfully harsh and demeaning. Just think about that next time you see a social introvert. Understand there could be a reason behind it.


likes: 3
comments: 8

203,435 Asian women in America come in two types.

The first type are the Asian women who come from middle class and upper-middle class backgrounds.  These women and their parents are the professionals like doctors, engineers, CPAs, etc.  These Asian women only date white guys.

The second type are the Asian women who come from working class backgrounds.  These women only date black and Latino guys.

At the very least, I've never known a professional Asian woman to ever date anybody else except a white guy.


likes: 0
comments: 2

203,434 Every time I see an attractive woman on Instagram and Facebook who's in her mid-30s, unmarried, and travelling to exotic locales, I assume she has herpes.  I assume she used her beauty to date the big, dumb muscle heads when she was younger, and the muscle heads lied to her and gave her herpes.  That's why now this beautiful woman isn't married.  She's damaged goods.  At least that's the first thing I think of, because I wouldn't go near a woman with that.


likes: 1
comments: 23

203,433 I've never thought of myself as prejudice, but I'm also not stupid. I went to an ATM at about midnight. I needed cash for a trip the next day. I took out $200. As I was counting the money and putting it in my wallet, another car pulled up to the ATM. This is an ATM at a bank. It's an enclosed space where you need a bank card to open the door to get inside. At first I didn't think anything of the other car. But as I was about to open the door and leave the enclosed ATM space, I notice there were four black teenagers in the car staring at me. When they saw me looking they turned on their headlights so I couldn't see them anymore because of the glare. I hesitated. I didn't open the door. I went back towards the cash machine pretending I left something behind. I was really stalling for time. It was obvious they were about to rob me or worse. I looked for a security phone on the wall. There wasn't one. There used to always be a phone on the wall of an ATM. What happened, when did the phones go away? It was probably more profitable for the bank to not have security phones. I didn't have my cell phone on me. It was in my car. I was trapped. What a strange circumstance. If I open the door I get mugged. But if I stay inside, I probably should be okay. I slunked down behind a table where they keep the deposit slips. I was pretty much out of sight. I thought this was good in case they became impatient and decided to shoot at me through the glass? Would a bank have bullet proof glass? Maybe corporate decided it was not profitable. Who cares if a customer dies. I should never have to think about such things. But here I was sitting on the floor of a bank after midnight worrying if I was about to die. A few minutes went by. I tried to reason out if I could dash from the ATM and make it to my car before they could get out of their car and stop me. If I could get into my car there's a button on my key fob that instantly locks all the doors. I looked at the fob to make sure I knew what button it was. That's when I noticed the red button. It was an alarm button. It had an icon showing sound coming out of a speaker? I had never really notice it before. I had certainly never pressed it.  No time like the present. My car alarm started wailing. It's loud. There are homes near this bank and I know for a fact that our police department has one car working through the night. He usually sits at the end of Main Street. He would definitely hear the alarm. The black boys must have had the same thoughts because after the alarm started, they backed up and took off. I quickly got out of the ATM and hopped in my car. Should I give chase? I wanted to. I wanted to catch up to them and ram their car, and ram it again and again until they got out and then I'd run them over smush their fucking skulls into the pavement. I realized I was shaking. I started sobbing. A grown man sobbing. I couldn't stop. I slowly drove down Main Street. This was the opposite direction from where the teens went. I looked for the night cop. His car wasn't there. Figures. I would have been too embarrassed to talk to him anyway while shaking and crying. I drove home. It's only about 5 minutes away. I fell asleep on the couch hating the world, and hating me, and hating this town, and mostly hating black people.


likes: 2
comments: 8

203,432 Yahoo appears to have the new feature. You have to agree to let Yahoo access all the data on your machine, or you can no longer read their content.

Thank goodness! This is exactly the excuse I need to never read Yahoo again with all their incredibly biased reporting.

I wonder what kind of person is willing to give Yahoo full acess to their device? Would you do it?




likes: 0
comments: 0

203,431 My boyfriend flew out to Portland for a week because his mother died. While he was gone I slept with his best friend.


likes: 2
comments: 7

203,430 I’m grossed out by women who go out of their way to be crude and gross under the guise of empowerment. Nobody needs to know about your “vag”. Especially in a work setting or on social media. F/32.


likes: 5

203,429 It is not possible to go anywhere in a car with my wife without her being completely angered during the trip. There's something about being in a car that sets her on edge. She lashes out at anything she can find, and I am very easy to find in a car.

Yesterday we were taking a one hour trip. Simple right? No. We were caught in traffic. I innocently made the comment, "Oh dear, this is disastrous traffic for our plans." I said that because we thought the drive would take one hour. Then we had an hour to eat dinner somewhere. After that we would be going to a show. If the traffic jam slowed us down by an hour, then we wouldn't be able to have dinner before the show.

She exploded at me. "This isn't disastrous! Who do you think you are using that word? This is unfortunate traffic. It's inconvenient traffic. It's not disastrous. You have no right to use the word disastrous. So what if we don't eat dinner." Which is a weird thing for her to say because she is always obsessed about eating.

Anyway, she wouldn't let it go. She more than loudly demanded I apologize for using the word disastrous. I explained it is just a figure of speech. If it rains during a picnic, one might say it's a disaster. Not like the Hiroshimi disaster. But it means the plans were messed up.

She continued to ramble and spit toxic fumes at me. She told me everything that was wrong with me as a person. All because I used the word disastrous. It was like something a mental patient might do, an inappropriate over reaction to a very simple situation. I witnessed this once in college. A mental patient saw a penny on the floor and screamed uncontrollably. This so reminded me of what my wife was doing in our car ride.

We finally arrived at our destination. We were much too late for dinner. But we would make the show. As we were about to go into the theater, my wife turned to me with a belligerent voice and asked, "We're not going to eat dinner first? You expect me to sit in a show for the next two hours without having dinner first? No, I won't do it. You need to get me some food!"

Maybe she does have a mental illness. I think I'll drop a penny on the floor and see how she reacts.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,428 I've been having esophagus spasms for about half a year. I'm exhausted from puking every day and every night and lack of sleep. As soon as I lay down at night I start puking lunch. I would spend the whole night vomiting and getting up every hour. I still need to go to work and my work is stressful.
Did some tests, doctors prescribed meds that don't work and that's it. I'm not sure what else to do. It's taking a huge toll on my life. I don't cook for family anymore; hard to cook when you can't eat. I don't go out to restaurants with friends and family.
Doctors are not helping. I had to push really hard to get an Iron IV as I can't take the pill or hold down even liquid iron. I'm anemic and just a couple of point away from blood transfusion according to lab results.
I've been trying really hard to ask for help from doctors but they do the bare minimum fix without trying to find the cause and provide care.
I don't know what to do next.


likes: 0
comments: 13

203,427 When I was a kid at a memorial mass, we'd light candles and hold them up as a nod to the deceased. It was very touching. I went to a memorial service recently These days kids put their iphones in flashlight mode and wave it around. I'm sorry but waving your phone around is just weird and not at all respectful to the deceased.


likes: 1
comments: 4

203,426 Sometimes when I hear "victims" stories, I feel it's an exaggeration to feel relevant with today's "oppressed" or I feel it's completely false. The thing is, I am a compassionate person, however I have a pretty good BS detector as well. People like feeling "misunderstood" or "different".


likes: 4

203,425 424 I get verbally abused daily because I hate Adulting and want to continue on living as though I am a child.


likes: 0

203,424 Children usually don't move out quickly where I live. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha




likes: 0

203,423 Title: Cameras Everywhere, Even In My Restroom?

Dad tapped on my phone, (I know you do you idiot). detect location, tapped motorcycle, tapped CCTV outside. So you two can look at what I do every day and that put you two at ease because you have a control issue. But especially you, Dad, just can't wait to see you dead just so I finally have some contempt over what you suppose to be.

When I asked them why?
My parents response: It will keep you honest.


likes: 0

203,422 My father is twisted and sick, He decided as a child I was his little barbie doll. He would dress me up. I have always hated dresses and try to make me his pretty little princess. "Don't do that, you're a girl, you might get dirty" I do it anyway and get my dress dirty because hey, I'm a fricken kid! Then I get punished. The older I got, the more I pushed back. He hated me for it. I am and have been what you label a 'girly girl' now. I get my nails done, make-up done, curl my hair, and botox. My mother told me a story once. She told me he never wanted to see me fat. That was the last straw and it made me sick to my core.I went through a few phases, pink, goth, emo. I hated being 'girly'I told him this is just who I am. He never could accept that. Still can't. Not my problem. He tried to push me in my adult life to be 'girly', I hated it. Still do. At least his definition of it was he loved it and that's all that matters. He wanted me in dresses and heels ALL THE DAMN TIME as though I was his suppose trophy wife and not his daughter. Perfect makeup and hair, both had to take forever or it wouldn't count. I tried, I was miserable. He got mad when I stopped. Even in my adult life, he only cares about his picture perfect idea of what I should be for him. I donated all my dresses which is a first step.It felt so good. I finally get to be myself without his sick twisted interference of what a Barbie doll should look like.


likes: 0

203,421 414. I can relate. I still get yelled at for being dirty lazy my room a pig sty. Leaving a dirty dish is a crime where I come from. We can get arrested for using expensive trash bags.

I bought Glad trash bags off Amazon once and was yelled and screamed at by my parents. Whom I'm married to.

In my country where I come from we marry our parents.

I'm moving out in a year and divorcing my parents. Hopefully they will not abuse me over this.


likes: 0

203,420 However, this is because my parents made me feel like a burden when they complained that we have no money.

Now I feel like such a burden when I have no money.

This makes me depressed with my mental disorder.

I might end it all because of this.


likes: 0

203,419 413 Wouldn't have it any other way...


likes: 0

203,417 Women who spit on the sidewalk... um... no thanks, you're not the one for me.


likes: 0
comments: 22

203,416 I went to Disney World alone. Okay, I'll say it. I'm weird.


likes: 0
comments: 9

203,415 Today was D-Day in more ways than one. I wonder if you planned that? We would have made great friends.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,414 My wife is lazy.  She rarely picks up after herself.  Packages will come in the mail and she'll leave them unopened for days on the floor.  

But she always promises she'll get off her ass and do things.  I once asked her to go through a box that sat on the basement floor and keep the stuff that she wanted to keep.  It was the very last box to go through.  7 months later the box was still sitting on the basement floor.  I finally lost my cool and told her I was throwing the whole thing out if she couldn't be bothered with doing what she said she was going to do 7 months beforehand.

Even wrapping the vacuum cleaner power cord back up is too much for her.  She'll leave the vacuum cleaner plugged in and lets the rest of us stumble around it.  The kitchen table is always a mess.

I've had enough.  It's been 15 years of this bullshit.

I told her tonight that we could never move into a larger house, because it's hard enough for me as is to pick up after her in our small house, and there's no way I could ever pick up after her in a bigger house.

She's now picking stuff up off the floor.

Guess a bigger house is motivation for a lazy woman, right?


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,413 Tonight I hope I won’t wake up. I am on my knees begging for mercy. I am just done with everything. I just hope I don’t wake up tomorrow.


likes: 1
comments: 5

203,412 I think I did something illegal. It didn’t even occur to me it was wrong for a week. Guess I’ll see if I get caught. Fingers crossed.


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,410 Dude, you come off as a straight up psycho. It's never going to happen, so you need to stay away from me.


likes: 2

203,409 I bet you half the people going to the straight pride parade are in the closet. I guarantee it! I've seen it a few times. People who are so over the top about how "straight" they are. Then a few years later, I found out they were gay. "No homo" is a joke as well. If you have to say that, then, I have news for you, you DID mean it in a gay way.


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,408 My roommate has this roller device with large steel balls on it for messaging her feet. She keeps it in the refrigerator because she thinks the cold helps. But to me this is gross. This thing touches her sweaty feet and then it's in the refrigerator next to our food. I shouldn't have to deal with this. Why don't people have common sense or an ability to think of others??


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,407 I'm tired of holding in my gut for this past year. I'm going to bite the bullet and buy a larger pants size.  I have to face it, I'm not as skinny as I once was.


likes: 3
comments: 4

203,406 I can't go to a movie or a theater performance. I get nervous and self conscious sitting so close to strangers. I end up sweating alot. I become stinky. Which makes me even self conscious. I've tried super scrubbing in the shower just before an outing. But I still get all sweaty once I'm in the audience. When people ask me to go out, I tell them I can't make it and I stay home.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,405 This is almost exactly what I expected to happen.

I'm glad I figured out the truth even though nobody wanted me to!

You can trick people into revealing their true feelings.

Just be prepared for what they show!


likes: 0

203,404 If l’m miserable, then everyone should be miserable. Because you know, misery loves company.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,403 A few days ago I was cleaning the kitchen after making dinner - as I always do. My wife came home. She made a snide remark about how there were crumbs under the kitchen table and I should vacuum. She's amazing. She does nothing, but she offers up her criticism. There's no dealing with her. I suggested she should could help out and vacuum. She of course blew up. This is her defense mechanism. When I point out she does nothing but go out and have a good time, she starts screaming. I then vacuumed.

But an interesting occurrence this morning. At 6 AM, I was fast asleep, as were our children, when suddenly I hear the vacuum. Hard to miss it. My wife was vacuuming in our bedroom. This was her passive aggressive revenge tactic. To wake all of us with the vacuum. This is who she is. You've never met a more spiteful and immature person as my wife. She vacuumed so she can claim she's done it. But she couldn't missing the chance to be difficult. So she vacuumed while we were sleeping, just to be as annoying as possible. Welcome to my life.


likes: 0
comments: 4

203,402 I want to leave my children nothing in my will.


likes: 1
comments: 10

203,401 A big Hollywood actress revealed she had anal cancer and at the same time her husband had throat cancer. The cancers were tracked to the same virus. They have both recovered and I wish them the best. But as an aside, clearly the actress was having anal sex. That's how the virus got in there. Very sexy to know this big name star was taking it up the ass.


likes: 0
comments: 14

203,400 I care to much about why people don't like me. Especially if it's because they think I'm a slut. Or just plain NUTS because of my struggles with mental illness. Maybe it's a from how I was raised. I'm sad I was raised to think this way.

I wish I was pretty damn excellent.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,394 I have finally written my will.
One step closer.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,392 Some people are such downers. All the can see is the negative. All they can do is complain. They constantly try to put others down. What miserable wretches.  Their punishment is living inside their own head. It must be hell. But I have no pity for them.


likes: 3
comments: 2

203,391 I wish I knew more poor people. I'd buy them things. Like if ever I saw poor kids lurking outside of McDonalds, I get them a bunch of meals. I want to do this. But I live in an all white rich town. The closest we come to poor people is a few golf caddies who drive used sports cars. Not the same as real inner city hungry kids.


likes: 0
comments: 3
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203,390 A new kidney won't even save her... she's just a baby... how is this happening...


likes: 1
comments: 3

203,389 My ex boyfriend is a pile of shit, now that I think about it. He would take whatever I was insecure about and amplify it, highlight it. He did it in subtle ways. He would say things in everyday conversation and then change the subject, leaving me to overthink. When I was younger and inexperienced, I used to think this was an accident. Nope! It was on purpose. What a piece of shit.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,388 I know a young pretty school teacher. She married her BF right out of college. It's been four years and in all that time he has never had a job. They live off her salary. I want to grab her by the shoulders and shake sense into her. He's using her. He always has the next big plan going on. That's why he can't get a job right now. He's a bullshit artist. He goes on and on but ultimately he never starts his big idea, and then he conveniently has another one, so he still can't get a job. The poor girl.  She is setting herself up for a life on misery.


likes: 2
comments: 4

203,387 My two sisters are bitches for always going to concerts without me.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,386 My cat looks like Melania Trump.


likes: 2
comments: 5

203,385 You all are STILL obsessing? Give it a rest already. Quit focusing on my flaws and worry more about fixing your own.


likes: 0

203,384 My daughter is one of those stubborn people who thinks she knows everything and isn't afraid to say so. She constantly lectures me about life, work, people, politics. You name it, she's an expert.

She's never had a boyfriend for more than a few weeks. Gee, I can't imagine what keeps going wrong for her...


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,383 This morning I saw a spider crawl up the wall from behind the couch then turn around and go back down the wall behind the couch again. I didn’t do anything about it. I hope he stays back there.


likes: 2
comments: 1

203,382 Listening to my coworkers talk about their kids and spouses makes me so glad I am single and child free


likes: 11
comments: 0

203,381 I wake up, roust the kids for school, pack their lunches, take the dog for a walk, eat breakfast, take a shower, start laundry and go to work.
I get home switch laundry, drive the kids to their activities, make dinner, take dog out again, check on kids homework, hit the grocery/target/Walmart and then maybe sit down to read for 20 mins before crashing in bed.
My wife sleeps in, goes to work,comes home to dinner on the table, eats and then sits on the sofa to binge watch some TV. She gets mad at me because we never do anything together during the week.
She is beyond selfish and to top it off is always too tired or stressed to have sex.
How did I get here?



likes: 0
comments: 5

203,380 some are pipelines, others are mules. most, i imagine, fit in the latter category, save for some rare moments of lucidity. there is great wisdom and humility in not seeing yourself as a source of creative inspiration but simply a vessel through which it moves so that it may find some expression.


likes: 1
comments: 0

203,379 My dear friend's new haircut makes her look like a boy.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,378 I miss the craigslist personals. It was like a deli case of varieties. One of my cl girls liked to finish  in the butt. Another one preferred being rammed with a big dildo in her vagina. Then there was Tulips. Afterwards, she would say, "Yum, good to the last drop."  Ah yes, the good old days.


likes: 2
comments: 5

203,377 I was asked to be on the parish council. I gleefully accepted. What a honor. Or so I thought. Then I was told it's customary for council members to make a $2,000 yearly donation to the church.

I have no words. I wanted to help the church by organizing breakfasts and finding more people for the choir. The church owns a rental house. I could paint the house. I could find new renters when the house is vacant. As a council member I would happily do all this for my church.

But now I have to pay $2,000 a year? There's no way I can afford this. I'm really quit miffed at the church for strong arming money from me. I don't know what to do. I'm afraid I now have to find a new church.



likes: 1
comments: 8

203,376 When something goes wrong with my order, and I have to call a company's customer service department, I often get asked if I'll take a survey on how it went. I never do the survey. I fear it's a test. If I say anything bad they'll intentionally fuck up my next order.


likes: 0
comments: 5

203,375 Every now and then I'll swallow a pill and instead of it going down my throat, for some reason it ends up rising and getting stuck at the back of my nasal cavity. I can feel it back there. Annoying as hell. I picture the medicine getting absorbed directly into my brain. This aint good. There has to be a better way of swallowing pills.


likes: 0
comments: 12

203,374 I first had to get glasses when I was eleven. Every year after that at my annual optometrist appointment, my eyes were always slightly worse than the year before. When I was in my late thirties, I asked the optometrist if there was anything that could improve eyesight. She said no, but recommended that whenever I was doing anything up close, like reading, to look far away every 20 minutes. So I started doing that. A year later at my appointment, it was the first time my eyes hadn’t changed at all.

Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not.


likes: 3
comments: 6

203,373 I've worked with this cute young woman for two years.  She works in a different part of the company, so I have no reason to talk to her and I don't try to talk to her.  But I see her almost every day.  I guess I have a little crush on her, and like everybody else I'll google her name when I'm bored.  

But it's been two years of occasionally doing this.  I've realized I've found out so much about this young woman.  I've found out about her parents, cousins, boyfriend, hobbies, her boyfriend's parents... just so much from getting bored every so often and googling her name.

I hope I never have a conversation with her.  Something might slip out.


likes: 3
comments: 0

203,372 I purposefully keep my Facebook page public for everyone to see.  I post pictures of my kids, our various outings, dumb jokes, silly stuff, etc.  I keep it all very lighthearted for everybody to see.  

I do this in case I ever have to violently torture and kill someone, so I'll be the last guy who people suspect did it.


likes: 0
comments: 2

203,371 Thought I’d let you men here in on a little secret as I see a recurring theme. Women don’t talk about this much because it’s pretty primal.
Fuck a woman just right and she’ll not let you go.
When I say just right I mean, a throbbing hard dick that lasts longer than 15 minutes. The trust needs to be right too. Before even thrusting, foreplay is a must. It takes a woman a bit longer to warm up, so kissing and stroking and oral is a good way to get her there. At a point, her pussy will be throbbing and you’ll know it because her face will be flushed. That’s a key sign. Women are so conditioned to believe the only goal in sex is to make the man cum, so that’s how faking comes into play. You cannot trust a woman to show her pleasure through moans or words. Trust the flush. If her face and neck/chest area are flushed; she is highly aroused.
At that point thrust. As I said, the thrust itself is important-fast and slow thrusts used interchangeably are amazing.
If you’re able to fuck her really well, she’s hooked.
I’m serious.
F/30


likes: 3
comments: 5

203,370 When my son was about three years old, I bought him a reusable metal water bottle. I let him pick it out. He picked the pink one. My husband was irritated that I bought the three year old a pink bottle. Something about women not wanting to date him when he gets older. He threw it out.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,369 Talking a huge shit is one of my favorite body functions.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,368 Somethings is wrong. I'm losing my grip. I find myself hating everyone and everything. If someone says boo to me I could see stabbing him in the eye. This isn't the normal me.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,367 I try to stalk my ex girlfriend online but she's so fucking boring she never does anything, so there's nothing online about her.


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,366 New York City is a disaster. Go on a wilding spree. Beat the crap out of strangers. Be an accomplice to rape. But hey, you are a minority, so sue the city and get an $8 million pay day. How fucked up.

Hey criminals, you should all flock to New York City. It's a dream come true for you.


likes: 3
comments: 25

203,365 People lie so much. Why do the liars think this is acceptable? Know this, we can tell when you lie. We judge you for it. We judge you harshly.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,364 I hate when people ask for money online with Go Fund Me, Patreon, etc. I see there's a word for it, e-begging. It's cringe worthy. Share things online because it interests you. Not to con people out of cash.


likes: 5
comments: 0

203,362 Never try to impress people by telling them you're smart. Sit back and be quiet. Take it all in. Find out what everyone else knows. Then act on it and make good decisions. As they sit their licking their wounds, they'll realize just how smart you are.


likes: 3
comments: 2

203,361 I still tear up when I think about you. I knew it was going to be hard, but I didn’t know it would be hard for this long.


likes: 3
comments: 2

203,360 I find so many good workout clothes at thrift stores!


likes: 5
comments: 10

203,359 What is it about the name Scott Peterson? One murdered his wife Laci Peterson. The other was the police officer hiding at the Parkland school shooting.

Do us a favor, if your last name is Peterson, don't name your kid Scott. It's not working out for the rest of us.


likes: 3
comments: 2

203,358 My wife is not vulnerable anymore. She is not sad. She is not in need of help or anything. She is woman, she is strong. And I hate it.


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,357 I refuse to go camping because there are no private clean bathrooms.


likes: 1
comments: 15

203,356 Marriage.

My wife will be nasty to me. Just out of nowhere, she'll act all pissy. I'll ask what's wrong. She'll bitterly tell me I'm a bad husband. Her friend is going to Spain this summer, and we're not. Then she'll call me an asshole and storm off.

Can't beat that logic.



likes: 1
comments: 0

203,355 In college I used to go for a run after sex. This was me atoning for my sins.

I became an excellent runner! I had lots of practice! LOL.


likes: 4
comments: 2

203,354 Another 3 month failed relationship? You were horrible to me so that's good for you


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,353 I see this coming. If I file for divorce, my wife will make up lies about me. She'll lie to the judge. She'll lie to our friends. She'll lie to our children. I'll go from the reality of being a nice helpful husband and father, to the false narrative of being a wife beater and child molester.

It makes sense. Her lying so much is why I need to get a divorce. I can't trust anything she says. So it should be no surprise she will lie if I slight her by filing for divorce. I can't win here.


likes: 1
comments: 12

203,352 Last night I told my boyfriend that I drink so little around him because I enjoy his company so much and I don’t want to dull the experience. I went on to tell him that even with a chronic pain issue I have, I would rather feel the pain and be with him fully than have that pain dulled and miss part of our time together.

Then I told him I was embarrassed and I shouldn’t have said anything. He gently brushed my hair out of my face and said, “No, it’s good. That is a very high compliment and it feels good to have someone enjoy my company so much. I wish more people would say things like that out loud.”

He normally doesn’t say, “I love you,” very often but today he said it twice. I haven’t had much good come from being vulnerable with men but I’m glad I am with him.


likes: 4
comments: 1

203,351 I stumble upon an old sepia photograph of a family and think how wonderful. Look at what they are wearing. Look at how proud they are. I wonder what the occasion was. Family at its best!

My husband looks at the same photograph and says, "They're all dead now."

One of us is happy, they other is miserable. Can you guess who is who...


likes: 3
comments: 0

203,350 I still remember being little and my father trying to make a funny quip in front of a large group and no one laughed. It's why I never speak up in public.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,349 What was the point of going to school to get a Masters degree? Hundreds of job applications denied. Dozens of resume rewrites. Job searches all over the state...and still nothing. It's not as if I don't try... Two years later and I'm still stuck in a dead end job working for pennies. No health insurance, a laughable pay and a boss that thinks his praising my hard work somehow pays my bills.  I watch him get wealthier and wealthier because of my ideas. Then I have to hear his sob story about how he is struggling financially. How? You cleared 35k LAST MONTH ALONE...I made less than half of that  ALL of last year.

I feel like such a failure- especially to my child. I have massive student loan debt, barely make it month to month and I feel dead inside. I'd off myself if I wasn't such a coward. All  I wanted was to be successful, make my family proud of me, help others with my degree. I wanted to give my child a beautiful home to live in and make sure college was paid for. On top of it all, I am struggling with clinical depression and I am so insanely lonely. No family support, no boyfriend because somehow I managed to attract users,narcissists and cheaters in my life so I gave up on relationships long ago, no knight in shining armor. No one to go out of their way to help me as I have done for so many others in the past...

What is the point of this life? To watch others prosper? I watch friends and acquaintances on social media buying homes, cars, getting married, going on vacation, getting promotions. I know it's not all for show. I cry myself to sleep at night. What did I do wrong? Why can't I have happiness in my life? I can't do this anymore...


likes: 1
comments: 24

203,348 I crave bending someone beautiful over my knee and spanking their naked ass til it's red.....why is it so hard to find someone to do this with?


likes: 5
comments: 8

203,347 Get lost.


likes: 0
comments: 0

203,346 Never travel to the Dominican Republic. If countries can't keep you safe, and put minimal effort into following up on outrageous crimes, then why go there?


likes: 2
comments: 13

203,345 People decorate their homes with such frou frou crap. I hate it. I hate all of it. Fancy couches with frills. Crystal vases. Wingback chairs with fabric matching the curtains. My God people what happened to you? When you were 10 did you long for chairs to match your curtains? Did that seem important? Kids grow up and lose their way.


likes: 2
comments: 0

203,344 I'm always nice. But if I'm particularly nice, my wife interprets this as me possibly suggesting sex in a little while. So she intentionally acts out and destroys the pleasant mood. Go figure. Being extra nice always becomes a bad thing. I'm a simple guy. If I get burnt by being extra nice, then what lesson do you think I Iearn?


likes: 2
comments: 1

203,343 Our town is having local elections today.  There's only one person running for our party's seat in a particular office.  They ran last year in a neighboring town and lost.

I told my husband I'm not voting.  Years ago, I worked with this person.  They are very shady.  I won't go into the details, but this person got very jealous of me.  They trashed my reputation and told lies about me to the boss, trying to get me fired.  They ended up getting fired themselves because of it.  So they went to the other person we worked with and told lies to them.  That one believed them.  They conspired together behind my back, and ultimately, this person reaped the benefits of one and a half years of my hard work - to the tune of $15,000.  I was a struggling single mom at the time.  I NEEDED that money.

This morning, my husband spent a good 15 minutes talking about our party's success and how it depends on voting from the bottom up.  And how I needed to vote for this person to insure that our party got as many votes as possible.  I reminded him of how this person essentially stole money from me when I needed it the most.  He says, "So you're not going to vote then?"

Add that to the list of things more important to my husband than his wife.


likes: 0
comments: 2

203,341 I always feel like a failure, because it seems like failing is the only thing I’m good at. I don’t want pity, but how do I change it? Like, can I just be a millionaire already. This is bullshit.


likes: 1
comments: 2

203,340 Rallies by gay people really bother me. Could I ever hold a rally for heterosexuals?


likes: 3
comments: 32

203,339 My town is constantly hosting fundraisers for a zillion different causes. I wonder how many of the donated dollars actually make it to the intended target. I mean, I look at the world today. Lying and cheating everywhere. It has to happen where fundraising dollars get "misplaced".  A woman here works in a shoe store. But she hosts a fundraiser every year. It was never clear to me what the fundraiser was for.... now she drives a BMW.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,338 My wife puts no effort into sex. I'll make her "happy". Then she'll give me 1 minute max of a hand job and suddenly stop and say her arm is tired and I need to finish it myself. She'll get up and leave the room.

The next time she wants me to go to a family function weekend with her, I'd like to drive one minute up our block, complain my arm is tired, get out of the car and walk home, while telling her she should take care of the family function weekend by herself.


likes: 2
comments: 8

203,337 My secret is that I’m an empath which means I can sense and sometimes feel the emotions of others and once in a while, their emotions become mine. Especially the Assad ones. The good news is that I can usually read people very well which helps a lot at work. The bad news is that I had to develop a tough exterior because many people try to take advantage of me. Then they think I’m a heartless bitch who doesn’t care about them or anything but really I’m just a raw nerve walking around taking everything personally and feeling lonely. Romantic relationships are extremely difficult and I’m the loneliest person I know.


likes: 4
comments: 2

203,336 I went from a living arrangement where I had my own bathroom, to one where I share a bathroom. I did it to save money. Big mistake. I no longer care how much I save. It's always worth it to have your own bathroom.


likes: 10
comments: 5

203,335 I hate how sometimes thoughts of my ex creep in and I just can't push them out of my mind. He fucked with my emotions so bad. I shouldn't give him one single thought. He isn't worth it. If only I truly believed that.


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,334 Why I married my wife. Because she came across as warm and charming.

Why I want to get divorced. Because she has a secret dark side. She is evil. Oh my god the things she has said to me. Example #999,998: She told me she wants me dead because I didn't park exactly in the spot she wanted. Example #999,999: She threw her dinner plate across the kitchen because she wanted cheese mashed potatoes, not garlic mashed potatoes. She gets in these black moods and I wouldn't put it past her to kill someone, especially me.

Why I haven't gotten divorced. It's complicated. I was recently at a large running event where she was competing. There were many hundreds of competitors. She placed in the top three and won a trophy. This shows how fit she is. But that's not the reason I stay married to her. The reason is what happened during the awards. The MC called up a winner. People politely clapped. He called up another winner. People politely clapped again. He called up my wife. The crowd roared. There was hooting and hollering and applause. Everyone started chanting her name. When the uproar finally died down, the MC said, "Wow, this is obviously the town's favorite resident!" They started chanting her name again. It was insane.

There's the rub. How do I divorce a woman everyone loves. They don't know what's inside her. But still, their adoration of her gives me pause. Maybe it's me. Maybe I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. It twists my thinking. Maybe it's considered normal to throw your plate across the kitchen and have it smash into 100 pieces??? Maybe???


likes: 1
comments: 14

203,333 I'm way on one side of the political fence. My closest friend in the world is way on the other side. We are both very opinionated vocal people. We discuss everything from education to movies to human frailty to money to religion. But we have never once discussed presidential politics. We know not to.


likes: 9
comments: 4
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203,332 The news media totally spoiled the outcome of today's big Jeopardy match. They couldn't help themselves. Do you know why they alerted everyone to the outcome before the showed aired? Because they are assholes.


likes: 3
comments: 1

203,330 Bowed out on a girls weekend to Vegas. The thought of it sounds horrible to me


likes: 1
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203,329 My brother in law bought a new camera. He told me he paid $1,000 for it. A few weeks later he mentioned how his $1,300 new camera takes great pictures. Then he left it in a restaurant and they called for him to come by and pick it, good thing, because he paid $1,700 for his new camera.

I wonder when he'll stop. LOL.


likes: 2
comments: 6

203,328 I rent this condo from a woman. She just mistakenly had a package delivered here instead of to her new address. She's a cunt. I'm not going to text her about the package. I'm going to leave it on the porch and hope it gets stolen.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,327 Gravity remains undefeated.


likes: 1
comments: 7

203,326 My daughter asked me to teach her how to drive a car. I tried. But we were going down a road and I saw small children playing up ahead. I told her she needs to slow down. She refused. She said if a child runs out in front of the car, that's the child's fault, not my daughter's. What kind of response was that? I screamed at her to slow down. But no, she kept right on speeding along. That was the last time I tried to teach her to drive. I'm done. Some young people shouldn't be behind the wheel.


likes: 2
comments: 8

203,325 Real estate listing:

"The interior of the home is ready to be gutted to allow for the new owner's personalized choices and designer tastes."

Translation: The place is a wreck.

Here's my problem though. If the seller is acting shady right out of the gate, then it makes me wonder what else he's trying to cover up. I will not get involved with a seller like this.


likes: 1
comments: 11

203,324 Remember this from last week? News agencies reported that North Korea executed their own negotiators after talks stalled with the US! They are barbarians!



Except here it is a week later and....



Oops. He wasn't executed after all. Our media has done it again. They just make up the news. They will say anything to create drama. It's shameful. Our media outlets should not be trusted. When you read something accusatory and horrific in the news, remember this North Korean story. Fake fake fake.


likes: 2
comments: 13
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203,323 I took the day off for some personal peace and relaxation. I didn't know this is the day all the neighbors get their yards mowed. It's been nothing back the whine of engines. Fuck me.


likes: 0
comments: 3

203,322 By my count, in my whole life 60 women have made me cum.

55 of them were after I got married.

Oops.  I think I have a problem.


likes: 2
comments: 1

203,321 What happened to Yale this year? There was the admissions scandal. Now it is announced the school is being thrown out of a national academic competition for cheating. Jeez, this is not the school I know. What the hell is going on over there? I'm embarrassed.


likes: 1
comments: 1

203,320 I once was in a back room with a stripper.  I took off my pants and she started sucking my dick.  I don't know where it came from in my head, but I told her to suck my balls.  She looked me straight in the eyes and started sucking my balls.

One of the better moments in my life.


likes: 1
comments: 6

203,319 So this is the way it always goes. She sends me a text. "Hey, wanna hang out 2nite?" I reply "Luv2". She comes over and we chat. Before long she will tell me about some expense she's picked up. I offer to help her out and she says "Oh, no! You don't have to do that." I, of course, insist. I give her the money or make the payment, whatever. She tells me I'm sweet and gives a little kiss, which becomes a deeper kiss. Before long we're naked and I fucking the hell out of this cute little 20 yo.

Happens every few weeks. Best relationship I've ever had.


likes: 4
comments: 8

203,318 Yeah, I love her to death. She's a great woman.
Yeah, I know she has feelings for me.
For Christ's sake, she's 250 lbs! I don't even know if I could get it up for her. Just not attracted to her physically.



likes: 0
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203,317 I tried to tell my husband a story last night.

Me: I read a story about a guy. He was a massage therapist and...

Husband: Why would any self-respecting man want to be a massage therapist?

Me: Anyway... so this guy...

Husband: That used to be a job for indentured slaves.

Me: Do you want to hear the story?

Husband: (sarcastically) Yeah I really want to hear it now that you’ve completely disregarded my point.

I never did manage to tell him the story.


likes: 0
comments: 8

203,316 It was never about the money.

I just don't like liars.


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203,314 I love my boyfriend and he turns me on, but sometimes when I’m having “me time”, it’s kinda fun to think of another guy...like one of my coworkers ;)

F/30/teacher


likes: 1
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203,313 I don’t think Zendaya is pretty. At all.




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203,312 When someone kills himself, I hate when people start talking about how his depression was hidden inside and no one knew. Fuck you. I'm not depressed. I doing it because you are all assholes. How about speaking the truth. People commit suicide because those around him are fucking douchebags who torment good people to death. Literally. Take responsibility.


likes: 6
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203,311 I'm glad my kids will ll be in college this September. I've had enough of them for a while. They don't listen. They take all they can from me. I haven't told them yet but I'm selling the house as soon as they leave. Next summer they can't come home and stay with me because there will be no home. I have a friend out West. I'm going to stay with her for a while. my kids will have to get summer jobs and fend for themselves. They are know-it-alls so this should be easy for them. In 5 years maybe we can reconnect, once they are more mature and wiser. Until then, good luck and good bye.


likes: 2
comments: 6

203,310 You are selling makeup to women in third world countries. They can't feed their kids. They have zero medical coverage. But thanks to you they have eye shadow. You must be so proud.


likes: 3
comments: 3

203,308 The uppity brats around here have a new fad. They take selfies on the subway tracks. They hop off the platform, snap a photo of themselves with the train rushing into the station behind them. Then they scurry back up on the platform.

I don't want to see them get hurt.

But at the same time...

I do want to see them get hurt.


likes: 0
comments: 6

203,307 I had so many things I wanted to get done today. Instead, I took a 3 1/2 hour nap and am watching TV. I guess I was tired


likes: 5
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203,306 I was at a wedding once where the people at my table were literally making bets on how long it would be before the couple got divorced.

It wasn’t long.


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203,305 Son of a fucking bitch. My husband and I did lawn work yesterday. I took care of the front while he took care of the back. When we were finished, we walked around our property together. I couldn't believe my eyes. Two big, beautiful azaleas bushes (each about 6 feet high). One of the three lilac trees. A beautiful honeysuckle bush. Most of the flowers in my planter that haven't bloomed yet. All gone. He said they were too big and unruly-looking. So instead of just trimming and pruning, he chopped everything down. No discussion, just gone. Iwwanted to vomit.


likes: 1
comments: 9

203,304 I don't understand how climbers could be missing in the Himalayas or anywhere for that matter. For a few hundred dollars you can buy a satellite locator beacon. Wouldn't the hiking company have one? Wouldn't that make sense? They take a group of people out 50 times a year. The beacon would only cost $5 per trip. $5 bucks to save everyone's life! I think the world is run by idiots.


likes: 1
comments: 6

203,303 My wife has been training for the San Diego marathon for three months. It's been hell. Not for her, but for the rest of us in the house. Everything has been revolving around her and her training. She has treated us poorly.

She is running right now. In another few hours she will be done. She has two choices for this afternoon. She can make amends. Or she can agree to end this marriage.


likes: 1
comments: 6

203,301 So I'm in N.Y. and they started this omny thing where you need a bank card or some online paying system and it charges you like that supposedly. Idk too much about it, other than you can still use metrocards for the next few years but then omny will be mandatory. Wtf? It will be automatically through your bank or credit card. Why do we have to be forced? Plus it's some one touch thing so your touching it to the screen. Look I know you're holding handles on the train and it's not the cleanest but I think tnT adds to it. You have to touch your card on the screen and pick it back up? The other way is a little cleaner. My main problem is being forced to, I don't like anything hooked up to a card where they automatically take money.


likes: 0
comments: 1

203,300 My mom joked with me that when I get a new boyfriend that I should have him watch the movie “Fatal Attraction” with me to scare him into not cheating on me. She was joking, of course, but I may or may not have done this a couple of times without telling them why we were watching it...lol.


likes: 3
comments: 9




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